The CMHT hate me

[Arienette]

Quote:

I can't quite concentrate on reading all of your replies, but I just wanted to say my heart absolutely goes out to you. The system is rubbish and unfair and inconsistent. It makes me so angry to see people like you ignored and being made to suffer and not have the quality of life you deserve, whilst others are given all the support they could ask for, bounce in and out of hospital using up the precious resources of a stretched service, do nothing to actually help themselves and all the while are loving the drama and attention.

I couldn't agree with this any more: it's SO true!

It's annoying and upsetting.

[in_BPD_hell]

I hear what you are saying and I'm not surprised cmht are rubbish. They are rude, inconsiderate and darn right dangerous! They make already poorly people even more distressed. They display no duty of care to their patients. I sympathise and understand where you are at x

[Epicene]

Quote:

Originally Posted by earthbound_misfit

It wasn't me who stopped the CAT - it was them. They actually presented it to me as "an extended assessment to see which kind of therapy would be suitable", but all the worksheets were CAT ones and afterwards they admitted she was a CAT therapist (but still felt she could say I was unsuitable for all therapies). Thus they would not take me back - the therapist even said my GP shouldn't refer me again.

Anyway... I am very interested that you find CAT helpful for trauma. I had heard this before so was keen to get on with it, but the process seemed utterly unsuitable. I wonder if the therapist wasn't very good? (Although she seemed like a nice person.)
The thing I found difficult is that it seems to be about looking at why you behave a certain way and the thought processess and historic events that lie behind it. So for example certain things might trigger bad feelings so you respond by self-harming. So you need to work out where those feelings are really coming from and adjust your response. Thing is, I have spent years doing this myself. So I am pretty good at saying "I am feeling this cos of x,y,and z," and as more memories and insights happen I piece it together. I don't respond by doing anything, apart from self-comfort eg. making tea, and telling myself the feelings will pass (this is very hard when in the middle of it as I'm sure you know!)
However, it doesn't stop the feelings being crippling. Sure, I'm not being dragged to A&E or self-harming, but being curled in a duvet drinking tea is also not compatible with living and causes genuine problems that feed depression - eg. missing out on things I'd like to do, or friends finding it hard to be around me when I am 'shaky' (the ones that don't mind are truly awesome), or being unable to hold down a job. One of my friends described me as "the most pro-active depressed person I know" and another pointed out I am actually very good at 'talking myself up', I just have this mass of pain from the past I need to go through with support.
I felt like I needed to address (and still identify a lot) of the feelings, sort of deal with them and lay them to rest. But CAT seemed to be about addressing behavoirs that follow the feelings. It's like they don't care how dreadful you feel or how crippling that is as long as you don't bother anybody. I don't do anything crazy, I just hurt alone and cope as best I can, but would like not to hurt so much.

ETA: As mentioned in earlier post, the CAT therapist actually said "I just can't understand what you're doing now that makes you feel so bad". She just didn't seem to understand that the feelings pop up as if from nowhere (esp. in nightmares and first thing in the morning) not related to any conscious action of mine.

How does this compare to your experience? (If you don't mind me asking, sorry I know it's very personal).

I've literally only just started CAT but will do my best to answer your question! Firstly, it sounds like the assessment process nor the therapist were that brilliant in terms of explaining what the assessments were for or how it can help. The fact that the therapist was so focused on your behaviour as opposed to experiences such as nightmares seems pretty at odds with the way CAT works.

It's supposed to be a time-limited therapy that integrates various other forms of psychotherapy; it doesn't just look at your current thoughts and behaviour, but explores life events (and thus trauma) and how these have contributed to things you struggle with now. A lot of it focuses on your experiences within relationships; both with yourself and others. So it's not so much about saying 'you avoid your emotions, so use mindfulness skills to process emotions more effectively', but rather 'you avoid your emotions because of XYZ experiences, but avoiding those emotions is leading to XYZ problems now'. In essence, it's about getting people to a place of understanding and acceptance, and builds the foundations for people to use coping skills but with a greater understanding of their life experiences.

For me it seems appropriate because I did DBT so know appropriate coping skills, but psychodynamic therapy or EMDR would be too triggering and unsafe because they require in-depth discussion of traumatic events that I haven't fully accepted or processed yet. In a sense, CAT bridges the gap between 'here and now' skills and exploring the past in a way that is not so intense. I hope that helps!

[yoyogirl]

But surly you not turning up for appointments could also ring alarm bells and for them to either say she needs help urgently or not taking recovery seriously, its a close call to make.

[earthbound_misfit]

@skinnylove911 - I think as I called in great distress to say my friend who was going with me had cancelled, it was pretty obvious I needed help. I can explain to them until I run out of breath; it doesn't make them actually listen.

To everyone, thank you for your replies and understanding. Having a particularly hard/lonely time atm and it's really touching that you bothered to reply.

@ Epicene - I just found it weird that there was no way to discuss or even really uncover traumatic things. I could have told you things that I thought were the main triggers but stuff coming up in *mysterious in-depth therapy* that I do now is stuff I'd not have considered - because I'd pushed it our my mind so much.
Also, the things I struggle with are all symptoms! Eg. I struggle with nightmares/feeling sleepy, dissociation, feeling like hurting myself etc. These are the things that cause problems in my life cos they stop me from holding down a job, interfere with relationships etc. So the bad feelings impact on everything else and I need to get to the root of them. As oppose to having problems in relationships or at work that then cause the bad feelings.
Actually keeping everything inside and trying to please and being frightened is the central theme, so CAT kind of exacerbated that for me.

Also, fascinated by the comments about people using up MH resources and not helping themselves! Surely people who did that would be straight on the "ignore the attention-seeker" list? When I used to get carted off to A&E all the time (almost a decade ago now) I was ignored and actually verbally abused by MH staff. In fact they still see me as an attention seeker :(

[Arienette]

Sometimes staff might not see it as they only see what is presented to them.

With the person I know they have a different diagnosis so are taken more seriously. Staff don't see what they're not told for example. Certain labels attract more quick assumptions than others.

Hence they're not in the attention seeking and ignore an treat like **** lists.

[Morpheus]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Utopia

Sometimes staff might not see it as they only see what is presented to them.

With the person I know they have a different diagnosis so are taken more seriously. Staff don't see what they're not told for example. Certain labels attract more quick assumptions than others.

Hence they're not in the attention seeking and ignore an treat like **** lists.

To be quite honest, i dont see how you can actually say this. Or how it is helpful in any way.

What makes you think you know more than professionals educated in this? Are you sure you are not just makigb assumptions without knowing the situation? And are you judging this by a single person you know?

I have what is considered a "serious diagnosis" and know many people who has and we all struggle to get help.

What makes you think you know enough about these people to make this judgement call? And how is it helpful for the op other than just making him/her more frustrated and feeling like they are being unfair?

How is it helpful for anyone on this site who actually do get help, to possibly start thinking that they are attention seeking and not helping themselves or dont deserve help or any of that crap. I am pretty sure that if they get help or end up in hospital, there is a bloody reason for it. They dont give help out for fun and they dont have people in hospital, without a reason. So maybe you dont know the whole story in these situations and is too quick to judge. Maybe you shouldnt judge and say some people are just attention seeking when you are not a mental health professional. You dont want to be judged as attention seeking,mso why are you judging others by it? And if you need to do extreme things to get attention, you actually are sick.that in itself is a part of being mentally ill.

I advice you to be more careful in your judgement, assumptions and what you actually see on here.

I have been in and out of hospital for years and i have been completely unable to work with them because i was too psychotic and every one was an enemy. Even the people i loved. I have never once been in hospital without needing it and it has saved my life and possibly others, several times. and i have always struggled to get the help i did get. In spite of it maybe not looking like it to others. My family has fought and fought for it to happen. It didnt come by itself and i went through tons of **** to get it but people dont see the fight my family has had. You just see my many hospitalisations right? And my lack of cooperation was not me not wanting to but me being too ill and psychotic to do so. I did not love the drama and attention, i actually wanted to be left alone more than anything hence why i have been sectioned often. I hate hospital more than anything and stay out as long as i possibly can. But there is nothing wrong with getting the help when you need it so dont make it sound like there is just because you cant get it.

Have you ever considered there is more to each story than what you see and the reason they do get help is the fact that mental health professional see this?

Dont blame other mentally ill for your lack of support. Just because you didnt get the support you needed doesnt mean others didnt need the support they got. And maybe they did need help more than you did. I cant judge that but neither can you. We are not mental health professionals and we cant judge who needs help more than the other.

I find these comments disgusting and i find it even more disgusting that people agree and share the same judgemental opinion. Especially on a forum for people who are vulnerable who may end up feeling guity for the help they do get, may not seek help because of these comments or feel that others may think this about them.

[Arienette]

I don't have the energy to respond properly right now. I have my reasons for saying what I said and I'm struggling to understand why you took it so personally because it wasn't about you or anyone you know, and the judgement wasn't about you - an it's a pretty informed observation of some people I know very well. What you have to understand is not everyone is sincere. There is a term for it. Malingering. I will explain later yeah?

I'll get back to you in a few weeks when I'm a bit better, bc right now my head is pretty fuzzed up and bouncy.

I'm not copping out of explaining my point, as I feel you have heavily misinterpreted my post and think I ought to explain it at some point when I'm better. I will. Just not now. Now is not a good time for this. Now is too fragile an My memory is too unreliable to string events together because I can barely remember waking up today even. I will make a note in my calender to respond if that makes you feel better, else I will forget.

I'll pm you. I'll make a not in my calender if that helps to respond to you so I don't forget. It's just now is not a good timing at all for conflict or heavy questioning.

In a few weeks I'll pm you. Yeah?