Scars affecting my social life

[Retrosimplicity]

So I don't really cut much anymore, but when I was younger I made the mistake of cutting in hard to hide places, like my forearms and thighs. The scars were deep, so I have white, puffy scars that you can't miss. In these days I completely avoided people and dated a guy for a year 1/2 that I wasn't attracted to because I was afraid no one else would accept me with such ugly scars all over my body.

I'm older now, and very lonely. I want to start meeting new people, but I'm afraid no one will want to date me or be my friend because of what I've done to my body. I no longer wear long sleeves anymore, so I'm afraid people will think I'm a psycho or attention seeker and not want to be my friend. I'm sick of spending my friday nights alone when I'd rather be having fun at a party. Has anyone had experience with people rejecting them, boys not wanting to date them, people avoiding them because of their scars? Is it possible I'm more bothered by my scars than other people? Any tips on how to meet new friends when I'm afraid they'll avoid me because of my scars is appreciated.

[castaway]

I have to agree with Auror here, I've never once had someone reject me because of my scars. Sure I may have had a few looks from strangers, but my friends have always been understanding. I haven't dated much, but it's never been a problem, I've had people who have seen my scars, and even known the story behind them still be interested in me.
I've never been called an attention seeker for wearing short-sleeves either. Most people realise they are from a long time ago, and surely shouldn't expect us to hide them forever?
The attitude I try to have is "Those that matter don't mind, and those that mind don't matter." It can be hard at times, because I have my insecurities about them too. But the vast majority of people are accepting and understanding.
My advice would be try not to let it hold you back, even if you are unfortunate enough to have a couple of bad reactions, the positive people and new friends you could meet will be worth it.

[Lone Star]

I'm in the US as well and it's been the complete opposite of what has been posted for me. I actually lost the girl that helped me and gave me the motivation to stop cutting because of the damn scars and I always got looks because of them. Long sleeve shirts have become my only friend. Nobody where I live now knows about my scars and neither does my current social circle. Those that knew ran away like I had the plague or something. Screw em I guess right?

Anyways, I'm not posting this to deter you from being comfortable with your scars. I guess it's more of a "Expect things from both worlds" type of thing. If you were in my state and saw you with scars I personally would talk to you and try to be your friend, but you and I have something in common so idk if that would hold any weight.


I used to care so much about my scars that I even debated whether or not to buy a convertible car because I thought I wouldn't be able to enjoy it but turns out long sleeves don't ruin the experience. I recently stopped caring though and I do drive with the top down, windows down and scars showing. No one turns back to look at em in traffic or stop lights and I purposely try to get sunlight on them after 2 years of hiding. I still keep long sleeve shirts in the car for when I go into a store or whatever but still...

Sometimes you just gotta let all care out the window and be you. The scars are part of us and whomever can't accept us with them doesn't deserve to be around us. Just make yourself look gorgeous and all will fall into place. Be confident in yourself!

Good luck.

[KelcieLe]

Hey, that's nothing to worry. You don't have to feel bad about your scars. If somebody notices it and makes fun of it, that person is not worth being a friend. So, just don't bother. Go ahead, meet new people, hang out with them and enjoy your life.