I barely made it. I should have done it, should have done it. It would make things so much easier for him, and everyone else.
We want it, we want, we want a reason to live. We need it, we need, we need more than this. Going through this life, looking for angels. People passing by, looking for angels. Walking down the streets, looking for angels. Everyone I meet, looking for angels.
You guys, I feel like crap. I'm so fucking tired. I feel hollow, like there's nothing left inside of me. I'm broken
We want it, we want, we want a reason to live. We need it, we need, we need more than this. Going through this life, looking for angels. People passing by, looking for angels. Walking down the streets, looking for angels. Everyone I meet, looking for angels.
Thank you all so much for your support.... I know I don't deserve it.
Today has been a little bit rough because it's wednesday, and I have church in a few hours. I don't like seeing the people there, because most of the youth group knows what's going on (like, five of them know inlcuding the youth minister and his wife) The looks they give me; so concerned and worried. I hate that because again, I feel it's a waste. Ugh . I don't know what to do or feel right now.
We want it, we want, we want a reason to live. We need it, we need, we need more than this. Going through this life, looking for angels. People passing by, looking for angels. Walking down the streets, looking for angels. Everyone I meet, looking for angels.
It stresses me out sooo much. My parents are watching me every five seconds at church and I can't talk to anyone. I was talking to one of my guy friends last week and we skipped our little class to talk about things, and my dad flipped out like he was going to hurt me or something. No, he won't because we're good friends, and even though he wishes he was something more. I'm just so confused and lost right now. I really don't want to go tonight, but I know I don't have a choice.
We want it, we want, we want a reason to live. We need it, we need, we need more than this. Going through this life, looking for angels. People passing by, looking for angels. Walking down the streets, looking for angels. Everyone I meet, looking for angels.
Ahahahaha XD No, that's definitley not the case! I meant to say the boy at church! My apologiesXD
We want it, we want, we want a reason to live. We need it, we need, we need more than this. Going through this life, looking for angels. People passing by, looking for angels. Walking down the streets, looking for angels. Everyone I meet, looking for angels.
You support a lot of people here, why should you not be deserving of that same care and kindness? You're hurting and all of us are here to read your words and offer our support, just as you have done.
I hope you are ok after going to church?
I truly wish there was something I could say to show you how worthwhile you are.
Is there anyone you trust, at church or school that you could chat to when things seem really bleak? Not necessarily to tell them everything, but someone who could be there and listen until you feel safe again?
Stay strong hun, you can get through this. xx
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step - Confucious
Courage doesn't always roar. Sometime courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying 'I will try again tomorrow.' - Mary Anne Radmacher
Q used to sit with me at the park, but I don't think he would anymore. That and the fact that I'm basically under house-arrest by my parents.
Church was alright. Dad didn't go cause he had to finish a bunch of work. That coy Caleb was like, really close to me the whole time. I know he likes me at least a little but I really can't deal with that right now. I don't even really feel the same way.
I really wish Q and I could function how we used to. Somewhere in between friends and more, at least for me. It's a tragedy, really.
And so is my life
We want it, we want, we want a reason to live. We need it, we need, we need more than this. Going through this life, looking for angels. People passing by, looking for angels. Walking down the streets, looking for angels. Everyone I meet, looking for angels.
I agree you deserve support to and it is okay to ask for it and accept it. We all need a little support sometimes and that is okay. How are you doing today?
"Recovery is something that you have to work
on every single day and it's
something that doesn't
get a day off."
Today was an alright day. I'm still struggling with my choice. I have the option to either die or not, and I don't see how living is the right one.
I'm so dissapointed in myself. I feel dirty, and unwanted. I don't want to feel like this. I feel unimportant. Ugh.
I feel like shit
We want it, we want, we want a reason to live. We need it, we need, we need more than this. Going through this life, looking for angels. People passing by, looking for angels. Walking down the streets, looking for angels. Everyone I meet, looking for angels.
The discouragement throughout the day is such a heavy weight on my shoulders. I kind of feel like a fifteen year old should not have to bear this much sorrow and pain.
That is so selfish. See? I can't even handle how hideous I can be most of the time. Does anyone else just feel disgusted with themselves? I want to feel happy and lighthearted, at least some of the time.
I feel bogged down. Like I'm trying to swim to the top and breathe, but the seaweed is just dragging me back down. The seaweed being school and relationships and cutting and bla bla bla
We want it, we want, we want a reason to live. We need it, we need, we need more than this. Going through this life, looking for angels. People passing by, looking for angels. Walking down the streets, looking for angels. Everyone I meet, looking for angels.
It sounds like you have so much resting on your shoulders at the moment and it's understandable to be struggling. Unfortunately, age doesn't seem to matter when it comes to MH/emotional issues - but things can get better and they won't always be this way.
You are a strong person, that comes through from your posts. It might not feel like you are right now, but we can all see you are.
You aren't selfish. We're not selfish for wanting to feel better. It's part of the human condition to want to change things when we're in pain/upset. I know how it feels to hate yourself and be disgusted when you look in the mirror, but we don't have a true image of ourselves when we're suffering, and that's why sometimes we need others to tell us what we're like.
You can get through this, I believe in you. We're all here, and you're not going through this alone. We have been where you are and we know how it feels.
x x x
♥It's the ups and downs of living life this way. Promise me you'll never go away. Just stay with me through one more night because it's always darkest before the light and now I promise you I'll never turn away. I won't let you give us one less heart to break...♥
We want it, we want, we want a reason to live. We need it, we need, we need more than this. Going through this life, looking for angels. People passing by, looking for angels. Walking down the streets, looking for angels. Everyone I meet, looking for angels.
I feel so drained, I can never recover my energy. I don't feel good, emotionally.
Ew. This is all so stupid. I just want to be done. Normal, that is.
Normal would be easy I feel
We want it, we want, we want a reason to live. We need it, we need, we need more than this. Going through this life, looking for angels. People passing by, looking for angels. Walking down the streets, looking for angels. Everyone I meet, looking for angels.
