Why is it so complicated??

[Slip]

why can’t fixing my broken be simple...

[small light]

I wish it was.. *hugs*

[Slip]

I hate that I find dealing with my life so hard....it shouldn't be hard just to have a life rather than an existence...
People keep telling me that I've done nothing wrong...why does it feel like I'm constantly being punished for something then?

[crazykat]

I wish there was an easy solution. Did you want to talk through anything? We are here for support if you need it. Take care

[Waylander]

^same.
I'm not saying your problems aren't a big deal, but you aren't the first person to feel that way.
If you can be clearer on what is wrong, perhaps you can be given support or just be listened to.
Support is always available on ryl. stay safe.

[Slip]

what's wrong? Nothing more or less than the normal...I simply find living hard...& I find that hard....all I'm looking at ahead of me is 40 more years of anger & hatred & hurting myself...there is nothing else....when there is it's never enough to be more than this raging hatred I feel.....

[crazykat]

It's hard when you feel stuck in a place of inner turmoil, don't give up though things can get better. Are you recieving any support at the moment?

[Slip]

what would support do for me.....no support...nothing...no...

[crazykat]

Support can mean that we don't have to go it alone. That someone can be there to share some of the burden heaped upon us. Would it be something you would consider? If it is you could start off by seeing your GP to see what support they could offer you.

[Slip]

I have done all of that - I saw my GP & I take the meds & I speak to a therapist....but at the end of it all I feel totally alone.
they all say that I did nothing wrong, but they can't answer when I ask them why I feel I am being punished.
They say that the impact my childhood had on me has imprinted on my behaviour & I need to change it, but no one will tell me how I do that...

[teachit]

I am feeling the same way. I currently go to a group therapy that I think helps. Today we were talking about recognizing how we are thinking. They had this list of disordered thinking and also a list of feelings. They said that recognizing the disordered thinking and the feelings it brings up is the first step. Then we need to try to counter the disordered thinking with evidence that it is disordered and try to increase our psoitive thoughts and focus on them. They said it takes a long time but eventually it becomes automatic. I don't know if it works but that is how they told me to do it.

[Slip]

thanks Hun, it does make sense...