Finding the middle ground

[The Stolen One]

Hey guys

I feel like I shouldn't be posting here as I never come this board or post support or anything. The only reason I don't is just because it kicks up old thoughts and yeah.
Anyway.

At the moment I'm at a point where I would like to loose some weight - I'm 'normal' but can definitely afford to loose some. I have to be really really careful because I have M.E which is really affected by food at times. I've put more on to try and help me get through uni with lectures and so on, I was told to eat for energy and so on. I've hated it, but I've done it. I'd rather eat more and go to uni than the opposite!
My problem is that I'm very much a 'all or nothing'. I don't really know how you know what's 'normal' food wise. Does anyone have any ideas as to.. I don't know, find out what's 'normal'

As much as I would really really like to go down the 'nothing' route I know that it would be so bad with my M.E
But I just don't know how to loose a bit without totally restricting. I spoke to a counsellor I was seeing about it.. she didn't really have much help other than the warnings not to get back like I was.

I don't really know, this sounds all stupid! Is it okay to eat breakfast, have a piece of fruit for lunch then a proper dinner?
I just don't know what's the right thing! what's healthy dieting and what's abnormal, I don't think I've known in years, I know 'all' from other people eating and nothing because it's obvious and I've done it before!

I'm just trying to stay healthy and in control! I'm not self harming at the moment (not sure how!) but I've had it before when I've stopped for a length of time and then that's when my eating goes haywire, I just don't want that at the moment.

[[SundayGirl]]

Hey,
I'm abit of an all or nothing person myself so I get how you feel. What you said though isn't a healthy amount. You'd need to add something to go with the fruit..a sandwich or even a good salad.
It's about eating enough do your not hungry but eating the right stuff.
Can you ask for a dietician?

[The Stolen One]

I don't need one really need one, I just need to be careful I think. I'm aware that I can go either way and I know I don't think about it in a 'normal' way - I hadn't for years just generally I can head over heart now I need as much energy as I can get!
It's just confusing trying to eat carefully

[Wonderland.]

How are things for you now?

[The Stolen One]

Literally the same.
I'm packing up my uni room to go home so eating more to try and keep my energy up
But things back to normal when I'm home and recovered. Still trying to loose what I can over summer.. just not sure how really!

[IdleButDeadly]

I use to have trouble eating, and now I seem to have gone the other direction and could lose some weight too! Like you, it's not like I'm overly obese or anything, but could lose some weight to be healthier!

It's a tough balancing act, I totally get what you're saying. For me I think what's been most helpful (even though I have a lot of trouble sticking to it) is to eat healthy, whole foods (not processed crap), with a good, healthy amount of exercise and SLEEP! Sleep is very important too!

I started taking coconut oil. It helps regulate your metabolism too! I recommend looking into it, it has lots of really awesome health benefits!

[The Stolen One]

It's actually really good to hear someone's the same! I have started to be more careful to cook when I'm well enough but it's not hugely possible at the moment - it'll help when I'm home from uni and someone can give me a hand

My problem is that I can't exercise for any length of time, and my body is really messed up so I'm not sure I could take coconut oil but I might ask my doctor next time I go to see what he thinks

Again, sleep isn't much help to me - I have chronic fatigue sydrome/ M.E which screws me over sleep wise. I definitely sleep much more than healthy people so I guess maybe that's a start?! Although feels counter productive because it's this that's been a push to gaining some weight.

[TimesLikeThese]

Caz <3

Not sure how useful this will be but I just wanted to share my thoughts with you!

The bottom line is you need to eat so that you have some energy, which I know is something that the M.E takes away from you. But I appreciate that shopping, preparing and cooking decent meals will feel like a mammoth task for you, and also exercising to balance out what you're putting in is also really difficult for you (darn chronic fatigue!). So I think the main thing you can change is what it is you are eating.

You need energy and so that will come in the form of carbohydrates such as potatoes, rice, bread, sugary foods etc (I know you know all this already but I'm saying it anyway!). Making sure you have carbohydrates that release energy slowly regularly throughout the day will be a lot better for you that topping up with high energy high sugar/fat snacks in between meals. There are healthier options within that too.. So instead of having white bread/rice, change to wholemeal, that sort of thing.

Also make sure you eat things that are high in iron as this may also help with the tiredness! Foods such as red meats, green vegetables and fortified cereals can give you that :) Drink plenty of water too.

I think the main message I'm trying to say is try to make healthier, high energy foods part of your diet. Eat regularly (I know what you're like!) to maintain your energy levels. Maybe you could keep a bit of a food diary for a few days then look back at it and see where you could improve your diet/habits? I'd be happy to support you with that if you needed :)

Also, what happened to the graded exercise therapy idea? Is that something you could ask your GP about? Could you maybe go swimming with a friend? *questions, questions*

I love you <3

EDIT: Also, do you eat breakfast!?

[The Stolen One]

Thank you <3 it's really helpful.

1. Yes, I do eat breakfast (normally). It's actually the one meal I try to always have as I can tell me energy levels change when I don't.. It's really bizarre that it's so big a change!!

2. The food diary is a good idea, I've been using a phone ap which is mainly a calorie counter but it's really good to see the things you have eaten - I just have to be careful not to turn it into a 'what day can I eat less' competition!

3. I'm trying to do the GET but it's hard because I can only do a really small amount. Doctor was saying like walk half way up your road everyday, then up it to 3/4 or the full road the next week and so on.
I however have bought a cross trainer because I was going for walks and getting stranded if my energy had died before I was back! I'm hoping to do it better now I'm home for summer and not having essays etc to write


The carbs are a good thought, maybe I should try and eat a bit more so might meal I need to snack (for energy) less?

For iron I take multi-vits with iron as I'm slightly anaemic, but I do try and eat foods high in iron if I'm feeling worse than usual and I can't think of a reason!

Thank you <3

[TimesLikeThese]

What do you usually have a breakfast? It's great that you make a special effort to have it - it's the most important meal of the day (apparently!).

Calorie counter app, nah uh, not a good idea. Like you said it could turn into a 'what day can I eat less' competition and the number of calories isn't that important, or at least it shouldn't influence your food choices for the day, so I would delete it if you can!

The food diary I was thinking of would be a simple what you ate at what time. Then you could look back and see if there is any room for making healthier choices. So for example if you wrote down..

Quote:

Breakfast (08.00): Two slices of white toast with butter and jam, with a cup of tea, white (whole milk) with two sugars

You could look at that and think 'what could I change to make this a healthier choice?' so next time you could have...

Quote:

Breakfast (08.00): Two slices of wholemeal toast with low fat spread and jam, with a cup of tea, white (semi-skimmed milk) with no sugar

It's not reducing what you eat, it's just changing small things to form a healthier diet. No calorie counting needed!

Or if you discovered from keeping the diary that you eat at all sorts of random times of day, or if you have X amount of time between meals you're more likely to snack on something sugary (let's be honest, it's convenient and tasty!) you can look at it and then come up with an action plan to change that! :)

Aye, the cross trainer at home would be good to try, but don't get carried away. Could you go for a walk/exercise gently with a friend? Then they can help you to get home if your energy disappears. We can do that when I come to visit!

Yes, eat regular meals then it will reduce the need to snack! That's what I think anyway :)

<3

[The Stolen One]

I use lactofree products which makes it harder to go healthier as there's so little choice as there is! But I've been trying to have the 50/50 bread et
I think my go ahead is just to ban crisps/ biscuits/ sweets unless I really really need them energy wise.

The app is a good idea! I do see what you mean but some days it's actually how's like 'wow, nowhere near enough... To the bananas!' Or whatever :-P

I legit cannot get carried away! Can't do more than about 7 minutes behave I get too dizzy to stand or whatever. I'm doing 5 mins a day at the moment and will only up it by a minute at a time - even I can recognise doing it til I collapse is counter productive :P
At uni I do go for walks with people but harder at home. Only person to go with is brothers but they won't let me walk at my (slow) pace - they race ahead and I just can't walk faster when energyless

Thankyou <3