Graphic - The love of my life left me and may never come back..

nickcloward · 06-03-2013, 08:44 AM

My name is Nick I am turning 17 in April and I had been with my girl friend (Kristin) for nearly 8 months. She has dumped me twice before for things I had never actually done but she has always come back to me. But about a week ago she dumped me and told me I would never have a chance ever again. I have been so depressed and it only got worse. Two days after she dumped me I went through her messages on facebook and she was sending naked pictures to some guy and telling him she wanted to have rough sex with him. I was so crushed. I told her that it wasn't right that she was doing that right after we had just broken up and that she should stop but she did the exact opposite and went and flirted and sexted more guys. I was so broken at this point, but I thought well if shes going to do it then I cant talk to who ever I want. I started talking to my past ex Brooke and Brooke started sending me naked pictures. I immediately stopped talking to her because I knew it was wrong. I later got the chance to hang out with Kristin and she told me she still loves me and that we could possibly get back together, I was so happy. But she then went through my phone and found the pictures, she got really mad at me and I wasn't sure what to do and I ended up lying to her face and told her that I had no clue where they were from. She later found out that I was lying and told me that she never wants to get back with me ever. I was so broken I cannot live without her. She kept flirting with guys and some were my friends and they would tell me how she says she wants to have sex with them. I knew there was no hope and I cut up my wrist, I carved "10-2-12 K+N" and "No One Cares" into my wrist. I went to her house later that day showed her my scars and told her goodbye forever and that I was going home to kill myself and I wasn't surprised that she didn't care and didn't believe me. So I drove home crying my eyes out and once I got home I tied a rope around my neck and to the balcony above the stairs going to the basement and I jumped. At first it tugs on me hard and it felt as if my eyes were going to pop out, my whole face filled with blood and my vision began to blur. But then the rope loosened and I fell to the floor very much alive. At that moment I didn't know what to think. No one knows that I tried killing myself until now. I need help I need to get Kristin back, I have tried everything I can't live without her and I can definitely not move on. Please help me!

PassedExpectations · 07-03-2013, 08:45 PM

i don't have time to reply to this now, but i just wanted to let you know that i read and care

sevn · 07-03-2013, 09:05 PM

You dont deserve to be treated like that! That is horrible what she is doing! We are here to support you :)

Patent Pending · 08-03-2013, 01:45 AM

Hi there.

Sorry you feel so lost right now.

What she was doing by breaking up with you and getting back with you because she knew how you felt about her wasn't right. People can't just turn relationships on and off.

Unfortunately, when people break up neither have the right to tell someone how to act afterwards. We all react to things in different ways; while I do think it's unfair to be like that with guys straight after you broke up, it's her decision and there's not an awful lot you can do about it. If you don't feel right doing it then it's obviously wrong for you.

I'm sorry you felt like you had to turn to suicide having lost her; but I think it's important that you see a way to go on without her. It might seem like you can't at the moment but I guarantee you will feel stronger and the hurt will lessen. I thought the same as you after a break-up but here I am, stronger and better being out of the relationship.

She didn't have a right to have a go at you for receiving those pictures; like I said neither of you has a say over the other, and it was highly hypocritical of her. You were simply doing what she'd done. In my opinion, what she's doing shows a lack of respect for your relationship and that would drive me into getting over her to be honest.

The fact of it is, you can live without her, and if you need to you will. There is no physical reason why you depend on her...even if right now it feels like you do. You're your own person and you deserve a happy and healthy life. You need to work on becoming your own person again.

Take care.

x x x

Snow White. · 09-03-2013, 09:20 AM

Hi Nick,

I'm really sorry to hear how much you're struggling right now, it sounds like a series of terrible events have triggered you into such a terrible state right now. It sounds like you need some support right now and your suicide attempt is really serious, I'm wondering if you can reach out to someone in your life and tell them how much you are struggling.

As difficult as things are now you can get through this and things can get better. Please reach out for some support and don't go through this alone. I suggest seeing a doctor as soon as possible, maybe to ensure no injuries also. The doctor can refer you to some professional support.

If you feel in danger of hurting yourself you can also go to the emergency room.

I think the best thing you can do right now is try to ensure your safety, and from there we can discuss the issue which have prompted this.

Let us know how you're doing x