I'd like to ask a question about the Say Here thread if I may. I agree with Liv in principle, because let's face it, the point of the Say Here thread is not to have full-blown conversations, and I admit I'm guilty of doing that many times. And I know that technically we're not supposed to talk about RYLers on that thread. However, the point of the thread is to say to someone what you can't actually say to them. Presumably this refers to real-life people that we feel we can't talk to in person. But where do you draw the line when it comes to addressing RYLers on that thread? Because many of us do know each other in real life, and sometimes we need to say things to each other and can't.
If only everyone could be as rational as that Jenna, the world would be lovely.
Personally I can't remember anything that was said because that meet was a long freaking time ago, but I distinctly remembering doing a lap of the table to say hi to you & everyone else because of you guys being new and looking a bit lost, and we had a discussion about people lying about a mental health problems. See, I can rememeber that in clarity but I can't remember who else was there :P
That is all I have right now, I forget what words are.
Just to add on to this. I attended that meet and I distinctly recall someone on the other table from myself, calling themselves the 'cool table' which to overly-sensitive slightly insane people means: 'OMG THEY HATE ME AND THEY DON'T WANT TO BE ASSOCIATED WITH ME AND THEY THINK THEY ARE COOL, OMG IM NOT COOL' (you get the picture)
Anyway.... moving on! :p
I think this kind of open and frank discussion is very helpful as I (who considers myself a QK'er) do not always jump into threads to support my QK friends unless it is proper out of line as I am quite good at stepping back and going errrrr maybe a little bit of paranoia here! ALSO, I think that QKtype people are very accepting of newcomers- I know at the above meet for example, Laurawr came and we didn't know her but made friends with her and in fact I know that if someone looks scared or lonely at a meet or is apprehensive about travelling, we are some of the first people to jump on them (not literally) and try and make them feel welcome (perhaps not what Jenna did to Rob though) through random conversation or silly games.
ANYWAY, enough from me, because there have probably been 400 more replies since I started this.
I'm just going to butt in with my two cents,
Basically, I agree with Tiff. Completely. This is basically because I have been on the end of it. A little while ago, everyone thought that a comment I made was directly attacking Jenna purely because of a disagreement that we had had before that. This ended with me getting 12 points. I'm not saying that I didn't deserve them for what I said, I'm not saying that I particularly care getting them. What I care about is people thinking that because Jenna and I had one disagreement that any comment that I make that is a bit mean is about her. It's not. I believe that I get on rather well with Jenna.
This entire situation has meant that RYL has started to piss me off a bit because I'm always scared that if I make a remark that people don't agree with, I will get peanalised for it.
I'm not saying this to prove a point or attack anyone or anything. What has happened has happened and I have got over it. I just hate the fact that people who don't even know me see me as this horrible person who is always being malicious to Jenna when I'm actually a pretty nice person who dosen't hold grudges unless people have done something particularly horrible to myself or my friends. I hate that no one will give me a chance because they automatically assume that if I say one thing that goes against something, I am being malicious about it when I'm really really not.
We had the gays, RYL has moved on, things like that will happen. We just have to not assume the worst of each other all of the time. We have to get together and make it work for the community as a whole because at the end of the day, there will always be the newbies and the oldies. People have to get over themselves.
The world is just illusion always trying to change me.
You will find wonder wherever you can, and spread joy whenever you are able.
I felt emotions of gentleness and pleasure, that had long appeared dead, divide within me. - Frankenstein.
I'd like to ask a question about the Say Here thread if I may. I agree with Liv in principle, because let's face it, the point of the Say Here thread is not to have full-blown conversations, and I admit I'm guilty of doing that many times. And I know that technically we're not supposed to talk about RYLers on that thread. However, the point of the thread is to say to someone what you can't actually say to them. Presumably this refers to real-life people that we feel we can't talk to in person. But where do you draw the line when it comes to addressing RYLers on that thread? Because many of us do know each other in real life, and sometimes we need to say things to each other and can't.
I personally think that it should be in RV if thats the case, simply because (and I have seen this happen) someone will say something and then the person its aimed at quotes and replies, then the other person quotes and replies back an really thats not the point of the thread. If it were my choice then it wouldnt be allowed to talk about/to anyone on RYL because it defeats the object of the thread,although were pretty lenient with the talking about other members on that thread.
I know its not entirely fair to make people take it to a ranting and venting thread but I think that would be the best solution.x
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
What I care about is people thinking that because Jenna and I had one disagreement that any comment that I make that is a bit mean is about her. It's not. I believe that I get on rather well with Jenna.
This entire situation has meant that RYL has started to piss me off a bit because I'm always scared that if I make a remark that people don't agree with, I will get peanalised for it.
I'm not saying this to prove a point or attack anyone or anything. What has happened has happened and I have got over it. I just hate the fact that people who don't even know me see me as this horrible person who is always being malicious to Jenna when I'm actually a pretty nice person who dosen't hold grudges unless people have done something particularly horrible to myself or my friends. I hate that no one will give me a chance because they automatically assume that if I say one thing that goes against something, I am being malicious about it when I'm really really not.
I have been in this boat too! Having my rants reported because people assume its about a person I have had a disagreement with and so on. Im a pretty non grudge holding person, I tend to say what Im feeling and then move on but its difficult when other people assume youre having a vendetta or something.x
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
Exactly Liv. It's when people drag things way out of context and proportion that the sh*t hits the fan. It sucks but what can you do apart from trust people not to go mental about something.
The world is just illusion always trying to change me.
You will find wonder wherever you can, and spread joy whenever you are able.
I felt emotions of gentleness and pleasure, that had long appeared dead, divide within me. - Frankenstein.
Exactly Liv. It's when people drag things way out of context and proportion that the sh*t hits the fan. It sucks but what can you do apart from trust people not to go mental about something.
Indeed! Its especially hard when its your friend who has been flamed or whatever too,but I think in those cases its best to let the two people deal with it and move on in whatever capacity that is.x
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
Probably not constructive but most of the time when i feel rubbish,i like the fact there are spammy threads in gc,I've always felt ok randomly jumping in and out of them as there isn't the feeling of committing to replying-whereas in specific support threads,i feel bad if i just randomly stop.
I find it comforting to know that even though i hardly ever post anymore,i can join in with a bit of banter and no one goes "who the hell are you???".
Maybe its just me though. Or possibly Im more comfortable with that sort of thing having come a long way from the person i used to be....
i would like to say, that whenever i post something on RYL, or when i was moderating if ever i had to intervene in a QK thread.. and indeed in my replies on this thread just now.. i imagine that you all talk about what everyone is saying and pick apart what people have written because i have heard rumours (as, i think, have most people) of a facebook group that you all have and it is to talk about people here.
thusly, it makes me paranoid about my activity here. I dont like the thought of being ripped to pieces behind my back.
(i dont think thusly is a word but ive thought about it so much that it sounds ridiculous anyway so im not sure at all)
i would like to say, that whenever i post something on RYL, or when i was moderating if ever i had to intervene in a QK thread.. and indeed in my replies on this thread just now.. i imagine that you all talk about what everyone is saying and pick apart what people have written because i have heard rumours (as, i think, have most people) of a facebook group that you all have and it is to talk about people here.
thusly, it makes me paranoid about my activity here. I dont like the thought of being ripped to pieces behind my back.
(i dont think thusly is a word but ive thought about it so much that it sounds ridiculous anyway so im not sure at all)
I have heard this too (and seen evidence) of it and it makes me sad and paranoid too.x
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
i would like to say, that whenever i post something on RYL, or when i was moderating if ever i had to intervene in a QK thread.. and indeed in my replies on this thread just now.. i imagine that you all talk about what everyone is saying and pick apart what people have written because i have heard rumours (as, i think, have most people) of a facebook group that you all have and it is to talk about people here.
thusly, it makes me paranoid about my activity here. I dont like the thought of being ripped to pieces behind my back.
(i dont think thusly is a word but ive thought about it so much that it sounds ridiculous anyway so im not sure at all)
Quote:
Originally Posted by griddlebone
I have heard this too (and seen evidence) of it and it makes me sad and paranoid too.x
OK soooo...
Yes some people are part of a Facebook group, yes those people may all be members of this site but it is not there for us to talk about people here on. YES, it happens. But this is a private entity away from RYL. I may talk about someone here, I may talk about someone from (god forbid) my 'real life'..... as these both affect me. Its like am friends with lots of random people at uni but I have a specific group for those I (used to) spend most time with.
I also know and have seen evidence of other members and a mod having inappropriate RYL-related conversations on FB (neither Liv or Charlie I hasten to add). People forget how visible FB can be.
Don't be sad and paranoid Liv or Charlie..... I do believe the general consensus is that you are both pretty cool! :p
Yes some people are part of a Facebook group, yes those people may all be members of this site but it is not there for us to talk about people here on. YES, it happens. But this is a private entity away from RYL. I may talk about someone here, I may talk about someone from (god forbid) my 'real life'..... as these both affect me. Its like am friends with lots of random people at uni but I have a specific group for those I (used to) spend most time with.
I also know and have seen evidence of other members and a mod having inappropriate RYL-related conversations on FB (neither Liv or Charlie I hasten to add). People forget how visible FB can be.
Don't be sad and paranoid Liv or Charlie..... I do believe the general consensus is that you are both pretty cool! :p
Yeah...see we know its away from RYL and therefore nothing to do with us, but I think anyone would feel the same way really....its like, in a perfect internet world what happens on RYL should stay here,I dont like feeling paranoid about it but I know it has been in the backs of our minds when handing out points etc. I guess its never nice to feel like people might be talking about you behind your back.....even though you know it happens all the time, when its being brought to your attention it kind of sucks.x
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
I think the main function of said FB group is to make it easier for more than two people at a time to have a conversation. And most of the time people use it to post about personal issues they don't want on a public forum. It is definitely not about talking behind people's back.
its like, in a perfect internet world what happens on RYL should stay here,I dont like feeling paranoid about it but I know it has been in the backs of our minds when handing out points etc. I guess its never nice to feel like people might be talking about you behind your back.....
Saying that though, in a perfect world, should everything that happens at uni stay at uni and everything that happens in my family stay in there? No of course it shouldn't because I would explode. I get paranoid about what is being said in mod and community team threads and I am guessing that being as you have seen evidence (god knows what or how) you talk about us. This place is paranoia central.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alpha Bitch
I think the main function of said FB group is to make it easier for more than two people at a time to have a conversation. And most of the time people use it to post about personal issues they don't want on a public forum. It is definitely not about talking behind people's back.
What Lana said! Also, I feel more comfortable on FB in public places and therefore can get support there when I don't feel comfortable being on RYL- ie at uni, when with family....
In other news, there is heavy precipitation where I am!
In other news, there is heavy precipitation where I am!
Know that feel, whoever said living on the coast was awesome lied! It's lovely in summer but in winter it's like ****ING HELL GUYS, WHO EMPTIED THE RIVER UP THERE.
Saying that though, in a perfect world, should everything that happens at uni stay at uni and everything that happens in my family stay in there? No of course it shouldn't because I would explode. I get paranoid about what is being said in mod and community team threads and I am guessing that being as you have seen evidence (god knows what or how) you talk about us. This place is paranoia central.
What Lana said! Also, I feel more comfortable on FB in public places and therefore can get support there when I don't feel comfortable being on RYL- ie at uni, when with family....
In other news, there is heavy precipitation where I am!
Thats why Im saying in a perfect world :P
Nope infact I was randomly PMd one day when I hadnt even spoken to anyone about anything like that!Honestly unless there is a mod issue to do with someone I dont tend to discuss members and what they do, I try and keep my worlds seperate! x
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
i know i had a paranoid attack about one of your rants liv and reported you and pm'd you like 'why are you talking about me behind my back? why cant you talk to my faceeeee?'
