Just to smash a bit of "sexism" or set people off...
If you ever want a professional kitchen cleaned get a guy to do it. All that ****ing around with grease traps, oil cages & other assorted heavy lifting, no, no, no. Get a guy to do it & supervise instead.
Being boss is fun.
Much easier.
Vi Veri Veniversum Vivus Vici.
By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe.
^ following on from that theme, if you want a nice dinner cooked, get a man to do it! Jamie Oliver anyone? Hugh Fearnley Whittingstall? (Not Gordon Ramsay though cos he is a prick.) Rick Stein? The guy who does the crazy cool stuff with dry ice etc whose name I can't remember at this second...
Even as the stone of the fruit must break
that its heart may stand in the sun,
so must you know pain.
There are only two ways in which one can live their life. One is as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is.
Well, The One Who, (I've tried twice to respond today but lost the messages each time - aargh!) I nevertheless have this old-fashioned belief that men have a positive duty to support and care for their wife and children. Of course roles can be reversed and women can have a career of their own, but the children have to be nurtured, nourished and loved by at least one of the partners concerned - and preferably both. But in almost most cases it is the man who has to go out and do the hunter/gatherer bit and the woman does the domestic stuff. It's in no way compulsory and of course it's something to be worked out within a partnership.
In my own marriage we accepted that I would earn the bread and my wife would stay and happily run the home and nurture the kids. It wasn't ideal, since I became a weekend commuter to London, but at least both of them had a full-time mother while I was away. And children have to have serious care ...
I greatly deny that I'm sexist. Instead (while very far from being a saint), I like to think that I know where my duty lies!
^what do you suggest happens in a lesbian relationship Tony? Should we just sit at home looking after our cats and cleaning, waiting for a knight in shining armour to dash in to become our breadwinner?
I hardly dare think what happens in a lesbian relationship, Narcissi - I'm only a man! But, if there are children involved, the same balancing of who goes out to earn and who does the nurturing applies (and, I'm tempted to ask, if there are children involved, where the hell did they come from?)
Well who looks after the children, The One Who? Or are we reaching a stage when no-one can afford to have them? I actually think that despite the present austerity (caused by government's previous bribing of the electorate) most people are better off than ever today, although they may be squirming at fuel bills and petrol costs.
I looked in at two pubs yesterday at lunchtime, looking for a friend, and both were packed with people eating and drinking as if there was no tomorrow.
Totally want to stay at home and look after children whilst baking. My inner feminist hates me :3
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
Well who looks after the children, The One Who? Or are we reaching a stage when no-one can afford to have them? I actually think that despite the present austerity (caused by government's previous bribing of the electorate) most people are better off than ever today, although they may be squirming at fuel bills and petrol costs.
The grandparents? Nurseries (provided by the state or privately run)? Child-minders? Friends More and more families are requiring two incomes to survive.
Quote:
I looked in at two pubs yesterday at lunchtime, looking for a friend, and both were packed with people eating and drinking as if there was no tomorrow.
Well, it is coming up to Christmas... There is also the fact that pub grub can be decent quality and at a decent price, so can be more economical than going to a fast food joint. Or maybe it was just that after facing the shops these people felt like they needed a drink!
Well who looks after the children, The One Who? Or are we reaching a stage when no-one can afford to have them? I actually think that despite the present austerity (caused by government's previous bribing of the electorate) most people are better off than ever today, although they may be squirming at fuel bills and petrol costs.
I looked in at two pubs yesterday at lunchtime, looking for a friend, and both were packed with people eating and drinking as if there was no tomorrow.
Tony.
Where I live, the couple has a really hard time until the child is two. Then it's off to day care and the stay at home parent goes back to work. People save up a LOT of money in order to stay at home and the working parent may pick up an extra job in order to help keep afloat. What usually happens is the parents rely on an older kid or a relative of some sort to take care of the kid while the parents are at work. It is prohibitively expensive to have a child in day care before the age of two. And, unless the mother is very ill, the couple usually decides who will stay home based on who has the worse paying job and who has a better chance of rehire after a few years out of the job market.
Mothers don't usually get maternity leave beyond a few weeks and it's extremely rare that it's paid. For instance, while emergency family leave is provided for at my job (By LAW), maternity leave is not. They wouldn't HAVE to allow you to take time off for a kid. What would happen is you would be fired. And replaced. The end.
We've seen it first hand, either both parents claim benefits in oorder to make ends meet or both parents go to work and get child care vouchers to enable child care. We found with one adult in work even with the benefit topups we couldn't afford to live on one wage. Now i'm a single parent, I have a housemate to share bills to keep us in luxuries, I could do it alone but this way I can buy nice clothes for the kids, indulge in baking/crafty activities and have the heating on whenever i'm cold, instead of only when the kids are awake/around. Plus housemate = adult company
Mand, South Wales, Full-time working, single mother to 2 scarily independent girls.
I AM A PROUD PLUMERIA SISTER
Totally want to stay at home and look after children whilst baking. My inner feminist hates me :3
I hate that people think you can't be a feminist and want this! Feminism is about the freedom to make choices and if your choice is to be a mother first then more power to you. :)
I hate that people think you can't be a feminist and want this! Feminism is about the freedom to make choices and if your choice is to be a mother first then more power to you. :)
I hate that people think you can't be a feminist and want this! Feminism is about the freedom to make choices and if your choice is to be a mother first then more power to you. :)
Ah its only because all of my feminist friends are aghast whenever I say it!x
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
Tony I think you're living in the past to be honest. Much as I'm sure most people would love to have a little nuclear family where dad goes to his lovely secure 9-5 job and mum staus home with her 2.5 children and bakes cakes, it just doesn't happen that way.
Look at the divorce rates for a start - I believe it used to be 30% in the UK? I'ts now 50% in New Zealand. Look at single parents, people who are losing jobs through no fault of their own, same sex couples, parents with disabilities, and the more and more common - two working parents. This is the reality. Couples are having children later and later - 20 years ago a 30 year old having her first baby was regarded as an "elderly primp", nowadays 30 is young and 40 is the new age to start having babies. When they do have children, they rely on grandparents sometimes but usually childcare centres and then have to organise it so that they don't end up paying more for childcare than they would to stay home and only have one income.
Even as the stone of the fruit must break
that its heart may stand in the sun,
so must you know pain.
There are only two ways in which one can live their life. One is as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is.
^what do you suggest happens in a lesbian relationship Tony? Should we just sit at home looking after our cats and cleaning, waiting for a knight in shining armour to dash in to become our breadwinner?
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