Hey I'm just wondering, how do talkative people find so much to talk about? I'm not being smart, I'm genuinely wondering. Like my 3 year old nephew never shuts up, and here I am 32 and I can barely hold a conversation. I'd like to be more talkative, but I just can't think of anything to say, and even if I do I usually think it's wrong/stupid so don't say it anyway. And also, how do people manage to start conversations with strangers? I barely know what to say to people I know, never mend people I don't know. Is anyone else like me, or am I just useless?
Well there's talkative and there's too talkative. Talkative people just wing it and don't worry how everything will sound etc. They have a stream of consciousness thing going on and that's ok. Excessively talkative people usually just like being center of attention and mug you with their chat chat chatter. Excessively quiet people often tend to be very judgmental and fear being judged as harshly as they are judging others so they get locked up inside.
I used to be shy and wouldn't speak a word, then my sense of humour/wittiness came into play and now I could make a conversation from anything, pretty much. Doesn't make you useless that you're not a talkative person, lovey! All people are different, and that's what makes us spesh! (':
I'm quite talkative I have made friends with many strangers over the years. I think part of it is not allowing yourself to worry what people think of you whilst being aware of their social cues eg someone enthusiastically responding I would carry on with the conversation if they were unresponsive I would take the hint and shut up.
I don't know whether my life is particularly exciting but I can usually come up with some anecdote/funny story to break an awkward silence. I find humour is key.
'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'
['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']
'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell. Oscar Wilde
Its hard to dance with the devil on your back. Sydney Carter
I good at talking to strangers because i feel like its ok to make an idiot of myself since i dont know them, normally what shuts me up is all awkwardness and stuff.
He was no longer jean valjean but no. 24601 -les miserable
Some of life's mysteries will never be solved, such as why, after spending an entire evening listenong to Bach, do I find myself humming "the birdie song".......
I am reaching, but i fall, and the stars are black and cold, as i stare into the void of a world that cannot hold- les miserables
Thanks guys, yes humour is always good and a good ice breaker. People have said before that I am funny. The weird thing is, when I get going you can't shut me up! I go from either dead quiet to dead chatty. I'm so weird!
I think I'm sort of an ambivert in this respect, sometimes I can't shut up and other times I can't think of anything at all! Guess it depends on who I'm with, some people just bring out the chatterbox in me.
I find a good way to keep a conversation going is to ask the other person (appropriate) questions about themselves or whatever. Helps them feel involved and gives you both more to talk about.
Thanks guys, yes humour is always good and a good ice breaker. People have said before that I am funny. The weird thing is, when I get going you can't shut me up! I go from either dead quiet to dead chatty. I'm so weird!
I think if you're like this then it'll come in time, you clearly are able to but it's learning the right things to say, like you'll subconsviously pick up 'successful' things to say and take in how others are doing it.
It's harder if you're really quiet and shy full stop because you don't have the chance to see how people react to you when you talk a lot to learn the better things to say!
I'm fairly sure none of that makes sense, I can't think of the right way to say what I mean!
There will always be a happy ending. If its not happy then its not yet the end.
^^thanks, usually people just look at me funny when I get too chatty lol. I'm also like Celtic heart in that some people bring out the chatterbox in me. Some people I just get hyper around.
I'm exactly the same, in that I am sooo talkative around people I know, still I get conscious about what they're thinking of what I'm saying, am I being annoying, etc. etc. so tend not to talk much. I feel like I'm being an idiot too if I just say what I am thinking because people don't get my sense of humour much. Including myself sometimes:P
The weather is the best talking point ever! I work on a till and if it gets awkward I throw in a sarcastic 'Ooooh isn't the weather lovely?'
For you to be here now trillions of drifting atoms had somehow to assemble in an intricate and intriguingly obliging manner to create you. It's an arrangement so specialized and particular that it has never been tried before and will only exist this once. That is of course the miracle of life.
-Bill Bryson
Don't ever frown because you never know who's falling in love with your smile.
