RYL Forums


Forum Jump
Post New Thread  Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 13-09-2012, 05:32 PM   #1
katie836
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Oxford
Boyfriend freaked...

My boyfriend and I have been going out about a month and I wanted to become intimate with him but I was terrified of him seeing my scars (mine are all on my thigh). I sat him down the other evening and told him all about my SHing and how I was abused by my step-dad when I was younger. This was the first time I'd every really told anyone the whole truth so it was a massive step for me, but instead of being supportive as I hoped he'd be, he walked out without saying anything. This was three days ago... I tried ringing him but I got no answer, just a text a few hours after saying he didn't want to talk. Has anyone got any advice? I just don't know what to do now and wondered if anyone else had problems telling their boyfriends/girlfriends about it...

katie836 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 13-09-2012, 06:01 PM   #2
Wonderland.
 
Wonderland.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007

I'm so sorry he has reacted like that but well done for being honest and telling him. When people hear that someone they care about is self harming it is bound to be a huge shock, I think maybe he needs some time and space to get his head around what you have told him. I hope he supports you through this.

Take care.
Amy x



'Cause I'll always remember you the same.
Oh eyes like wild flowers within demons of change ♥


Wonderland. is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 14-09-2012, 12:36 AM   #3
Celticroots
 
Celticroots's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: United States
I am currently:

I am sorry he reacted the way he did. I am sure that must have felt horrible and it's understandable why you're upset.

I think your boyfriend reacted the way he did because he doesn't understand. People who don't self-harm wouldn't understand how someone can hurt themselves on purpose.

I hope my answer helped.

Celticroots is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 14-09-2012, 02:37 AM   #4
csu.claire
aspiring social worker
 
csu.claire's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: sydney or wagga wagga
I am currently:

when my boyfriend discovered i started cutting we had already been going out for a year and a half so for me it was different and i have known him 10 years before we started dating

but he too completely freaked out and started crying and begin me to stop and now when ever i am home from uni he watches my body extremely carefully to see if i have new cuts and if i do he flips out and he watches me even more carefully when im in the kitchen using a knife

he was abused as a child and had depression so from his point of view i have no reason to cut and i was on medication for depression and at m=one stage he called me weak for being on it



Some infinities are bigger than other infinities.

You don't get to choose if you get hurt in this world, old man, but you do have some say in who hurts you.

I am running the show. Everyone is waiting for me. I decide. I know this now.


Dying is easy. Living is hard

csu.claire is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 17-09-2012, 10:55 AM   #5
pixiedust_11
 
pixiedust_11's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
I am currently:

Hey there, I'm sorry he reacted this way. The truth is, is a lot of people do care dearly for their loved ones, but when they hear something like this, it is bound to come as a huge shock for them. I see that you posted this a few days a go now. Has he managed to get back in contact with you? If he is still giving you the silent treatment, maybe you could send him a fairly neutral message of some kind suggesting that you'd understand why he would freak out in the way that he has but you didn't intend on that information getting in the way of your relationship. I hope he manages to calm down a bit.



Do not be dismayed by the brokenness of the world. All things can be mended. Not with time, as they say, but with intention. So go. Love intentionally, extravagantly, unconditionally. The broken world awaits in darkness for the light that is you.

pixiedust_11 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Members Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Censor is ON
Forum Jump


Sea Pink Aroma
All times are GMT +1. The time now is 01:34 AM.