Forgiving Oneself

[Cleril]

Hello there, let's say you did something wrong, or otherwise something that isn't the norm. Let's say that telling someone of this exploit, while possible, would change things with the relationship of your family (if only for a short period). And so comes to the part where you forgive yourself.

I think I'm having trouble with this part. How can you tell when you've forgiven yourself for something you did? I've said it aloud to myself, comforted myself, and yet I still feel anxiety about what I did.

Telling my parents, while entirely possible, would be something I'd like to avoid. Let's just focus on the forgiveness party because as I said, I don't know if I've even forgiven myself. And I'd like to.

How does one forgive themselves and how does one know that they've forgiven themselves?

And if you can't forgive yourself, how do you go about fixing that?

Thanks for reading.

[Fleeting Angel]

I have struggled with forgiving myself a lot in the past couple years. I am very hard on myself and need constant reminders that I don't need to be. Life is easier if you can accept mistakes and forgive yourself. Needless to say, I haven't been very good at this.

I haven't told my parents about any of my struggles. At one point in time this really bothered me because I felt like they don't really know who I am. Then I decided they do not need to know everything. They know who I am and accept me for that. I know they still would if I told them everything so it doesn't matter if I do or not.

Depending on the event it can take me a long time to forgive myself. It's hard to exactly define when I've completely forgiven myself and have moved on. It takes time even long after you've last thought about it.
I work on loving myself and not harming myself. My harm in the past has been a result of not forgiving myself. So when I am not harming myself in anyway (no matter how small). I'd say that I've been able to forgive myself. I might not be completely there yet and it's hard when I make another mistake. but I'm no longer letting it affect me so much on a daily basis.

I found that hearing other people tell me it was not my fault was extremely helpful. It was hard to talk about it because I am a private person but in a couple instances it's been worth it.

not sure if i've made any sense. but i do have a lot of experience learning to forgive myself. to accept mistakes. to let go of the experience and move on