How to cope?

[Pikachu]

Wow. Haven't been on here for a while.
Life was looking good.. stopped self harming.. I thought something was actually going right for once.

Until this morning when my boyfriend of nine months dumped me. With barely any reason. He now won't talk to me or anything. I just don't know what to do. I've been crying for the last three hours.

How do I cope with this???

[WinterSparkles]

Hey Pikachu (love the username btw),

It's really difficult after breakups, especially when the other half won't keep in touch with you (I've been the one who does that most of the time). Maybe give him a bit of time before you try to speak to him, he's probably feeling just as upset as you are.

In the meantime, it's easier said than done but you need to distract yourself - keep your mind off him. Maybe you could go out with some other friends? Try something new, watch a comedy, etc, anything to make you laugh/smile and remember that life does go on (even if it doesn't feel like it).

I can't just tell you what to do, really, because everyone deals with it differently, but you need to try your best to stay strong and distract yourself with other, happier things
xx

[crazykat]

Break-ups are always hard to deal with. It is important to remember that you won't always feel this bad though, these feelings will pass in time. As time goes by it will get easier to deal with. The important thing is to talk about how your feeling with those around you, don't isolate yourself from your friends. Also it might help to keep a journal for a little while to get all your feelings out so they aren't all staying inside. Try and distract yourself too if you can because dwelling on it is only going to upset you more. Take care
Kat xxx

[Pikachu]

Sorry, I never replied to this thread and I feel bad about it.
Two months on and I still have no idea at all why I was dumped, even though he said we were "okay" (friends) and that we would talk about it. Pretty sure he has a new girl now anyway.
Fortunatly, I have really good friends at work, including my bosses, and have been able to talk freely about the situation and they have supported me fully and i've actually become closer to a lot of people due to it, which I suppose is an upside.
I've also been able to go out more and spend a lot more time with my best friend which I wasn't able to before (his jealousy)

Anyway, i'm still feeling down a lot of the time, especially when i'm alone, but so far i've only harmed once. Although I have a feeling it won't stay at just once :( The past couple of days i've been extremly close.. and drinking on my own tonight probably isn't going to do me any good..

[a_seething_one]

I don't know....but for me writing out shit I wish I could have the opportunity to say to this person has been helpful. Sometimes it's also been more distressing, but usually I feel better having things off of my mind, and on the paper.

[Pikachu]

Quote:

Originally Posted by apomixis

I don't know....but for me writing out shit I wish I could have the opportunity to say to this person has been helpful. Sometimes it's also been more distressing, but usually I feel better having things off of my mind, and on the paper.

I try not to think about what I would/want to say to him.. because i'm worried i'd actually end up saying it to him. Thanks though, I might try it sometime