*sighs* I relapsed...it's been a while

ebec11 · 27-03-2012, 08:02 AM

I have a hard time with quantifying time, but it's been a few years, with the occasional one time relapse here and there. But now I'm obsessing about it, thinking about it all the time...I've only relapsed twice so far, and it's not bad, but I know it'll get worse. I have a boyfriend now, and I'm super happy with him, but once he goes away, the depression just comes back. I'm sad, and I lack any kind of motivation. I need to get a job, as I'm finished high school and not ready for college. But the thought just makes me more depressed and stressed.
*sighs* I feel like I'm whinging, I just liked being SI-free. I was proud, and now I feel lost.

Getting_There_Monkey · 27-03-2012, 12:00 PM

Hey, I don't really have much advice, but maybe you need to find that motivation from somewhere :) And get yourself a job and things as I felt low but then as soon as I got a job it helped my self esteem as I felt like I was worth something as I was doing something which then also took my feeling of being depressed out of the way a little bit. Maybe find a small part time job which then can get you into work and then move up to a full time job?
Sorry not so great with advice at the moment. You can always pm if you need a chat
Take care x

FabulousMike · 27-03-2012, 07:26 PM

I think it's normal for them feelings to come back every so often so try not to beat yourself up too much about it, it happens to the best of us.
My best advice that i can give you is maybe going to talk to you GP/doctor about this, they might be able to point you in the right way so you can get some help before it gets too bad.
Please try to stay strong and positive!

PassedExpectations · 28-03-2012, 12:41 AM

what Monkey said about the job is often true. it is what happened for me. i always tend to procrastinate on things cause i'm anxious that they will be stressful, but once i actually do them, i'm fine, and i often even feel better.

do you need help filling out applications or setting up interviews? maybe you could have a parent or friend help you with some of it so that it isn't as intimidating