If you are feeling suicidal, post here...

[out of ashes]

squishes everyone.
ha i love it when people judge me. in real life, without knowing the facts.
bloody icing on the cake today.

[Heaven Knows]

*hugs Taylor*
Sorry you got judged <3
x Katie x

[DollyPOP]

I've had enough. I woke up so well, and was doing quite good but i've been entirely out of it today.

an ABC team or social worker or someone phones for me yesterday but i missed it and aparently she asked me to phone her. I don't want to, I don't deserve their support and i dont want it anymroe, and I have NO faith in my CMHT, everytime i've asked for help i've been sent to opposite direction...

and my best friend is giving up on me, and everytime i'm down just shouts at me, and now i hate her and want to move into another house, agh stress.

I just want it to be over. I know that sometimes though i feel hope, but at the minute it's just despair. I just want them to let me go.

I think my best friend is selfish for not leaving me on my own to ill myself but bollocking me everytime i'm down or whatever, like, youre making this even MORE hell than it needs to be.

It's like that thing, if you're gonna do it, do it and stop going on about it.

So I'll shut up now and stop goign on about it. Like I dont moan about my CMHT anymore, i need to stop taling about death and if i'm going to do it i will, liek instead of just going on and on and on about it.

I wish i could just drop dead, out of no where, just bam gone!

:(

i feel like my problems are too mountaineous and complicated and secret for them to sort out, i have too many secret thoughts again..... fail.

sorry to moan. Sorry.

[Mum24]

I have lots of secret thoughts DollyPOP. If you want to stop going on about it I understand but how about choosing life instead of death. Pick one trusted counsellor or therapist or doctor and only go on about it to them. Glad your friend is stopping you and cares. We care too. Please don't do this. Reconsider

[out of ashes]

thanks honey, yeah wasn't the best of day's today. bloody managers driving me crazy, could have got shed loads done today, if he had done,one simple thing.but no he has to act like a dick. but the bloody icing on the cake today, was been called something nasty behind my back, and saying it loud enough that i would hear it. fucking hate that, when people only judge people on what they see on the outside, not thinking that maybe there is a reason behind it. ugh. sorry just pissed off

[Mum24]

I leave in 25 mins for my appt. I'm freaked out. Don't think I'll open my mouth. :(

[Mum24]

Hugs out of ashes.

[Heaven Knows]

DollyPOP and Taylor - I have no words. Hopefully I can post more later. *hugs for both*

Rachel - Please? *holds hand* together yeah? I'm with you all the way.

[DollyPOP]

Quote:

Pick one trusted counsellor or therapist or doctor and only go on about it to them.

I don't have any I can talk to. no-one. My GP is busy, my CMHT are no use, i've tried them - and i always lie anyway. I'm not helping myself because i can't be botered anymore, thanks for you rkind words although i dont deserve them.

I don't have a life left.

[Heaven Knows]

I don't think I can do this anymore. I don't even have the energy to reply to my support thread or messages.
Can I just sit here and let everything shut down now?

[Mum24]

Katie... Holding your hand and holding you up as best I can. Don't give up. Maybe need a rest? In it together. Together!

[out of ashes]

hmm feeling really suicidal, very damn triggered. sorry guys

[Heaven Knows]

Rachel - No rest. Mind if moving mile minute. Mhm. Together. Not feel togeter.

Taylor - wish had words but can empthis as feel same. *hugs*

[out of ashes]

squishes gently. thank you honey. please stay safe.

[Anonymous2012]

I honestly feel like a ghost to everyone around me. I have literally no friends that I can rely on or talk to. No shoulder to lean on when I get these negative thoughts in my head. I'm going to be real blunt about my issue. I feel worthless, to myself and to everyone else. I see myself as a failure. It's obvious I'm not happy, but no one seems to take notice. They're all caught up in their own little worlds.. I understand that everyone has problems they've got to deal with.. I just wish someone would take notice of mine for once.

[givemethismoment]

for the first time ever -- EVER, I feel like some people would be better off without me here. Not because they've made me feel that way, but because it's probably true. Once they got over it everything would be so much easier for them. This is horrible.

[StuckInReverse]

I give up. i just want to die. nothing more i want. Please and thank you.. :'(

[Mum24]

My pdoc increased the abilify from 4mg to 10mg. He doesn't think that's why I'm not sleeping. He says it's for bipolar and depression and psychosis although he doesn't think I'm bipolar but he said the other pdoc that I saw in the hospital thought I was so,..
I don't know if I can follow these directions. He said to take my gabapentin at night and that should help with sleep. And he prescribed a side effect pill incase I get jitteriness from the abilify.*
I can't do this. I'm not psychotic. My thoughts are real.

[Heaven Knows]

I've already given up...but that's okay now.

[getting_by]

*Holds Katie tightly*
Not ok hun. Cant give up. Please.
Not ok at all.
*Holds on tight, not letting you go*