You are like an abusive boyfriend to me. I try to break up with you because I can't take this stupid bullshit, the trauma and abuse you cause me. It's such a love hate relationship and I don't know what I ever saw in you. So when I break up with you, you come back. You taunt me, you make me feel like dying, you keep stalking me and threating me until I take you back.
I keep breaking myself over you, and I'm sick of it. I tell you this all the time. But this time there is no such thing is "I can't promise I'll protect myself but I'll try" because **** YOU. I hate you. I'm sick of the scars from your physical abuse. I'm sick of you lowering my self esteem and insulting me each time we're together. You're done. I'm sick of feeling like a piece of **** because I could feel so much better if you were gone. You can go now, because stalk me all you want and you can't break a new found faith in myself. (:
WHY do I miss you so much all of a sudden? I thought you were out of my life for good.
Please hold off until after my holiday? I need you to go away until I can hide! Just wait a few months!
Also, I still hate you.
We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shaddow that never leaves. - Buddha
sometimes youre the only f'ing escape i have. others hate you but .. i know you help.. only temporarily but you help at the moment its needed. i just wish you didnt leave such bad scars for me to have to try to hide.
You're my comfort and a safe place and I know you leave these scars but you comfort my heart and with broken thoughts filled with an empty void I embraced you. You have taken from me but have been my best friend I know all you do is rip and cut but I need you. And one day I'll see all that you are for what you are. One day I'll win the war inside me.
Lotus Flower: grows out of the mud and blossoms into a beautiful flower
He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along-Psalms 40:2
I miss you...I wish it was safe for us to get together again, but too many people are around. I don't want to have to wait for classes to start in Jan...I want you now...
"It's not a dream anymore. It's worth fighting for."
"Well, if it's not real you can't hold it in your hands
You can't feel it with your heart
And I won't believe it.
But if it's true
You can see it with your eyes
Oh, even in the dark
And that's where I want to be, yeah" - Paramore
Why can't you leave me alone? I'm finally away from everything that makes me miss you. Can't you just leave me alone, I don't want anyone to find out your still going round my mind. And I really don't want my new friends to realize I've ever relied on you, I've already pushed that!
You're better than this. Breathe in. Breathe out. It'll be okay. I promise. Just don't forget to smile :)
The funny thing is,
nobody really ever knows how much
anybody is hurting.
We could be standing next to somebody,
who is completely broken,
and we wouldn't even know.
Even though i don't harm anymore the wounds are still there and the scars remind me of what i have done. Self-harm i hope to never go back to you and i'll do my best to avoid your temptations it's just not worth it anymore.
Take Care, Stay Safe, Shout if you need anything
