help please

tinamarie · 12-05-2011, 01:55 AM

i been cutting myself alot, my mom thinks i stopped and is even paying for a tattoo to celebrate, i feel terribal but cant tell her i havnt stopped, i should be doing well as i have a new puppy, but with recent illness i cant stand it anymore i wanbt to cut and even want to die, i cant keep haveing 3 or mor seizurs a day so i cut. anyway what can i do about everyone celebrating i feel so guilty

beets · 12-05-2011, 02:02 AM

It sounds like you've got a lot of pressure on your to not cut. Could you maybe talk to your Mom and tell her that all this pressure is hard? Maybe you could just tell your Mom that you've had a relapse (which, unfortunately, often happens in recovery) but that you want to work to stop again. Just telling her that you've had a little slip up but want her support in getting back to a "healthy" state (assuming this is true).

You also mentioned that you want to die - have you gone to see a counsellor about this? I'm very sorry you're feeling this way - I hope you can work everything out soon. Please PM me if you ever need to talk.

Take care and stay strong.

surviver15 · 12-05-2011, 02:05 AM

I agree with Beets. You should really be honest.
Best of luck. <3

PassedExpectations · 13-05-2011, 02:17 AM

well, for one thing.... telling yourself that you "should" be happy because of something doesn't usually help. blaming yourself because you aren't happy is most likely going to make you feel worse. better to focus on ways to help you feel better, and that isn't necessarily more things. its doing things that you enjoy, being in the moment when you're doing them, so you aren't worrying about something else when you're doing something thats fun or relaxing. you could find somethings that you really enjoy doing with your puppy for example. just having a puppy doesn't necesarily make you happier, but having a pet can definately be an asset when they help you feel loved and take your mind off the troubles.

i'd tell your mom that you're struggling though. whatever you're comfortable with her knowing. and you could say that you want to wait on the tattoo for a bit, so that you can get farther. or you could say that you haven't picked a design for certain or something, and need some time to think about it more?

tinamarie · 19-05-2011, 03:04 AM

i tried to go to hospital today but they said there were more urgent people nd i couldnt go idk what to do

beets · 25-05-2011, 04:34 AM

Hey - I know it's been a bit since your last post, but how are you doing? I am very sorry as for how the hospital treated you...that is disgusting that they would not help you. Could you go to your family doctor maybe instead to get some help/advice? Or a walk-in clinic. Maybe you'd get better treatment in a place like that?

Hope you are doing well. Take care.

fragile as glass · 25-05-2011, 01:33 PM

Do not lie to your mum.

Do not get that tattoo because it will have been ''earned'' under false pretences and if your mother finds out she will be devastated. Plus the tattoo will take on a different meaning and instead of having a tattoo which holds good feelings and makes you feel proud, you will look at it with guilt.

Your mum will have more respect for you if you are honest and then get your tattoo when you really have turned a corner.