Generally people who tell people to stop rule breaking/tell people to move rooms etc. I guess its a problem because they dont have any authority/basis to tell people to move/behave.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
^ See, part of me wonders why someone should need an 'authority' to do it. Of course no one likes to be 'told off' by another normal member, but in some cases it's just common courtesy. But then of course, there is no stopping some of the regulars from doing what they want to do.
I guess they have the right though to kind of say 'hey, this is making the space unsafe and unpleasant for the rest of us - could you do this please?' If there is no mod available I don't know why people should have to feel upset and not say anything about it.
Lol I didnt say people dont have the right.I dont have a problem with it personally,other members of chat do though.Ive seen it many many times.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
I also didnt ever say people cant say when they are distressed by something, I feel like what I've said is being edited a little.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
No, you misunderstood. I didn't mean it from a mod point of view (although I'm sure I've seen some who would prefer members not to say anything with regards to moving rooms or anything...), I mean it from a member-to-member view. There can be an attitude of "you're not a mod therefore I can still do what I want".
It's not a response so much to what you said. I know you were explaining the reasons why some people might have a problem with it - I was simply challenging those people's idea.
Lol crossed wires aplenty! I didnt see your reply so that wasnt aimed at you!
yeh that is the attitude a lot of the time.x
Quote:
Originally Posted by The One Who
No, you misunderstood. I didn't mean it from a mod point of view (although I'm sure I've seen some who would prefer members not to say anything with regards to moving rooms or anything...), I mean it from a member-to-member view. There can be an attitude of "you're not a mod therefore I can still do what I want".
I've only seen this a few times though.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
Got it :) Sorry...Im a bit sensitive about chat heh ^_^ x
Quote:
Originally Posted by disappear
It's not a response so much to what you said. I know you were explaining the reasons why some people might have a problem with it - I was simply challenging those people's idea.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
Haha, sorry Liv. I know you are pretty protective of Chat.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
I think this is a ridiculous thread. What on earth is it going to solve, people will just continue where they left the moment its back on. If you dont like chat, you can always stop coming there. Dont ruin it for the people who can cope with the drama etc. that is connected to chat and who are capable of getting something positive out of it, in spite of that.
For whoever wanting it closed for a week.. just stop coming there for a week. No one is putting a gun to your head, forcing you to log onto chat. Take responsibility for yourself and stay away if thats what you need, but dont ruin it for the rest of us.
Den fuldkomne kærlighed,
Kan ikke eksistere blandt ufuldkomne
I think this is a ridiculous thread. What on earth is it going to solve, people will just continue where they left the moment its back on. If you dont like chat, you can always stop coming there. Dont ruin it for the people who can cope with the drama etc. that is connected to chat and who are capable of getting something positive out of it, in spite of that.
For whoever wanting it closed for a week.. just stop coming there for a week. No one is putting a gun to your head, forcing you to log onto chat. Take responsibility for yourself and stay away if thats what you need, but dont ruin it for the rest of us.
dont normally agree with u, but completely 110% agree with this.
I agree it seems to be filled with attention-seeking drama queens who seem to revel in causing arguments and tension amongst chat members. So instead of closing chat, send logs in about the people who are causing the arguments and hopefully we can get rid of those who cause drama as opposed to getting rid of Chat altogether.
I have also suggested to other members when someone starts 'playing up', instead of rising to it, leave Chat or the room for ten minutes, because if everyone did this, King/Queen of Drama would soon get the hint that their antics would not receive the attention they usually seem to want. I say usually because I know this is not the same for everyone, however if someone needed support but started acting out instead then blaming it on being 'triggered' or whatever, members going into another room or leaving Chat when it starts up may cause them to realise if they'd like support, they should ask for it the conventional, calm way and stop, well, being a dick about it.
I apologise if this doesn't make sense, I am very tired :P Basically if someone starts drama, if you feel like arguing back, leave. Or just leave anyways. They'll get the hint. Hopefully. (I understand this is the same as disciplining a child - reward/punishment etc. etc. - however, people who cause drama tend to be acting ridiculously childish anyways, so why not?)
I'm gonna tap him like a maple tree. I'm gonna search him for some syrups. I'm gonna be having sex with him.
I agree that people are probably just going to pick up where they left off, but I don't think it's ridiculous for people to have an opportunity to talk about it. People cope with the drama differently. If they question it and say it makes them feel uncomfortable when rulebreaks are going on, then that's not not coping with it, that's coping with it differently.
Yes, take responsibility and avoid chat if it's too difficult for you, but likewise, the people breaking rules need to take responsibility for those natural consequences, too.
I apologise if this doesn't make sense, I am very tired :P Basically if someone starts drama, if you feel like arguing back, leave. Or just leave anyways. They'll get the hint.
I agree that people are probably just going to pick up where they left off, but I don't think it's ridiculous for people to have an opportunity to talk about it. People cope with the drama differently. If they question it and say it makes them feel uncomfortable when rulebreaks are going on, then that's not not coping with it, that's coping with it differently.
Yes, take responsibility and avoid chat if it's too difficult for you, but likewise, the people breaking rules need to take responsibility for those natural consequences, too.
But, that is not gonna happen by closing chat. People need to report it so the mods know, who is causing problems and can deal with them appropriately. I am not saying discussing is ridiculous, i am saying the suggestion of closing chat is. Or at least, thats what i meant by what i said. I genuinely just dont see how closing anything for a week is going to solve anything.
My biggest issue with this thread is, that instead of encouraging people to take responsibility for their own well being, it is encouraging this site to do something that you as an individual, should be able to do yourself. you cant make other people form this world into a world that suits YOU best. You need to find ways to adapt to it and if a situation upsets you, you remove yourself from it. This thread is like saying "I am scared of dolls, so none of the other kids can play with dolls". Which is completely unfair and I dont think any mature person would suggest that. Is it then not better to report rule breaking, get the people punished who deserve it, take responsibility for yourself and remove yourself from upsetting conversations when they happen, so that the rest can get something positive out of it?
I am not saying we dont have a problem with chat, but it will not be solved simply by removing the oppertunity to meet in chat, temporarily.
Den fuldkomne kærlighed,
Kan ikke eksistere blandt ufuldkomne
I totally agree that closing chat would not be helpful. I am with you there, entirely.
I guess, on a more general level, and not as a thought that is 'aimed' at you, I was just pondering on whether taking responsibility always means removing yourself from an uncomfortable situation (which, sometimes it does) or whether people who are feeling more emotionally robust can challenge the situation. I suppose I was thinking about the issue that people 'can't' question the arguments in chat at the time, and suggesting that arguments don't affect just the two-or-so individuals but impact on the whole community. That's also not to say that it's not natural that arguments go on - with a mix of personalities, it's understandable and totally a part of normal life. In my 'ideal' world, individuals would go away every now and then and reflect on their interactions with others, because the way we interact with others can say a lot about our own personal struggles.
