Doesn't bother me either.
I mean I see people do it in public all the time & couples on Facebook too.
I don't see it as a big issue, but I know other people feel differently.
Quote:
Originally Posted by control freak
I don't want to see tongue. Nor do I want to see licking or anything like it. Kissing is fine if it's just a kiss but not if it looks like two people are trying to eat each other.
I dont have a problem with kissing but I don't really want to see it plastered everywhere. It's annoying.
Quote:
Originally Posted by The One Who
So it seems that the general consensus is that closed-mouth kissing is fine, but anything more than that including groping and licking should perhaps remain private.
DILLIGAF
"it’s when you’re acting selflessly, that you are at your bravest"
- Four.
♥
I don't mind the kissing photos, but seeing ones of people licking or tongue kissing is kind of gross and i think if they are licking or tongue kissing photos that people should hide them in my opinion.
For me, the problem isn't that there is a lot of people tounging eachother.
The problem is that it is one particular couple (and only this couple, as far as i have seen) who actually post the pictures that cause all the complaints about inappropriate types of photo.
The suggestion that "this sort of thing is to be expected" is true BUT only because of who is posting in the thread - correct me if i'm wrong but in the brief period between relationship#1 & relationship#2 there was no drama/upset/disgust at any of the content in "the you and your significant other thread" .
I know that it's all part of the "**** the haters, i love you babygirl" campaign but i really do think that, at least to some extent, the "haters" are being encouraged and wound up on purpose. It's all bullshit.
If people have such a problem with me and Zar, then put us on ignore, if we're the only ones people have such a problem with.
We posted one kissing photo, we didn't post any of us licking each others tongues or sticking our tongues down each others throats, all I posted was me licking her nose, and tbh, I find that cute, as does my girl, I've seen a lot of photos like that even between friends, let alone couples, if it was me posting what everyone is on about with Zar, then we would either hide future photos of such things, or we wouldn't post them anyway, so I don't see the problem, neither does a lot of people aside from people who already had a problem with us.
And we're the ones being wound up, expect some **** back we're not just gonna sit here and take the crap.
I really don't think people should expect anything involving groping, licking or tongues in general in that thread. Just because it has pictures of couples, there is nothing to suggest that sort of thing. Also, putting on ignore really isn't a solution. And calling people pathetic, or homophobic or any other personal comments that have been thrown around here and in that thread really aren't that helpful either.
As an aside, I don't actually think pictures of people kissing shows 'how much in love they are'. How much in lust they are, or that they are in the sort of honeymoon period maybe, but I don't see the association between photos of kissing and how much in love the are. Maybe I'm missing something.
"You can't imagine the immensity of the **** I'm not giving."
Don't care at all. If I did, I wouldn't seek out the photos, and if I did accidentally see it, well I'd probably move on. And if the signature bothered me so much, I'd either report it to the moderators or put the member on ignore.
I love it. Someone complains about being triggered by words or such and they're laughed at, or told to harden the **** up, we should expose people, teach them to deal with it, ryl is/isn't/is real life etc etc bullshit moan that is always around somewhere. But you can't post a photo that might have a kiss, or a tongue in it.
^ Yes but Aimee you are always saying that RYL isn't real life and if something upsets enough people then maybe it should be looked at. Kissing doesn't seem to bother anyone, it is the more graphic (occasionally borderline pornographic) ones that do.
I'm not really wanting these banned or anything, there are already a hell of a lot of restrictions on what photos people can post, eg the What Are You Wearing Today thread. I was just posting to see what other people thought and as a way to get the discussion out of that thread and into a more dedicated one.
I very rarely see people groping or licking or eating each other in the street, but I do see people's scars in the street. Yet we warn people (on a forum about self-harm of all things) that some photos may have scars visible.
Why would we *not* warn people when there are scars visible? Scars are some of the most triggering things for self harmers who are in recovery, and as this website is about recovery, it only makes sense to alert people who are triggered by scars that, inside this thread are scars.
Yes, I have said that in the context of things like scars, very triggering ed-related photos, because we come to this site to deal with those issues. I don't think this is a prolific enough problem it needs to be looked at in a thread like this; maybe it just needs to be reported. It's happening by (let's face it) a minority of people. If the mods had as many reports as they did replies to this thread they'd be inclined to act on it.
In the same way I don't make a thread based on one persons rule breaking comment, so we can all discuss it, I feel this is unnecessary. Quite simply; report button.
Generally, I think people should be more respectful of other people's opinions and feelings. I'd rather not be told by a moderator to take it down, but be respectful and take it down myself.
The thing is a lot of people on here are raped, and can trigger them off because there is kissing. Same thing for self-harm and the such. I know we should expose people to this, and lessen the effect, but people are more vulnerable than others, and don't need the extra triggers. And exactly this is a recovery site, so why trigger people that are being/have been abused?
"Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self esteem, first make sure you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes." - W. Gibson.
The thing is a lot of people on here are raped, and can trigger them off because there is kissing. Same thing for self-harm and the such. I know we should expose people to this, and lessen the effect, but people are more vulnerable than others, and don't need the extra triggers. And exactly this is a recovery site, so why trigger people that are being/have been abused?
I have been wanting to mention this, but was to afraid to voice my opinion. Because I was abused and raped. and although I do not mind kissing pictures in general, groping, tongues and licking, just triggers the **** out of my thoughts!
^ See, now (Jo, Sammi) that is legitimate reasoning.
I am sure that if I put a picture up of me kissing my partner (...I am sure if I had one to kiss and then put it up) but was explained it was triggering someone due to a past history of abuse; I would take it down that instant with an apology.
Why would we *not* warn people when there are scars visible? Scars are some of the most triggering things for self harmers who are in recovery, and as this website is about recovery, it only makes sense to alert people who are triggered by scars that, inside this thread are scars.
In the same way I don't make a thread based on one persons rule breaking comment, so we can all discuss it, I feel this is unnecessary. Quite simply; report button.
Scars have never bothered me, everyone has scars (self-harmer or not) and so getting upset by them has never really made sense to me. Having to label threads and pictures so as not to upset someone doesn't really make sense to me when this site is meant to be a place where people can be open about their self-harm. There's very little that people can do about their scars and accepting them is a part of recovery.
I made this thread because the significant other one was getting derailed with people discussing the photos, like it has been before in similar cases. I felt to make a dedicated thread in order to discuss the issue in a calm and mature manner (without the name-calling that was happening) might be more beneficial. That way we can know what people think of these things.
^ See, now (Jo, Sammi) that is legitimate reasoning.
Thats harsh, that was my first response in this thread - because I was to afraid to voice why groping, licking and tongues down each others throats pisses me off, I thought I would let someone else bring it up, which they did. and you take the piss with my reply!
I do not mind kissing, kissing is fine. Its sweet and romantic. But licking, groping, tongues down each others throats, is just, NO!
...and Im not looking for attention. And neither me or Jo created this thread.
I understand that. I just think that, we already know what they think, it went for three pages in the other thread. At any point I feel the more appropriate response would have been to encourage post reports; let the mods know how you feel about it (as they can take action), and then to have got the thread moving.
Instead we have another, three page drama about the same set of photos.
I appreciate your response about scars, but fact is they do trigger many people and not everyone is at a stage where they can work on accepting it.
Sammi I was saying you had a really good reason. As in... It's a good reason for the pictures to not be there.. it wasn't a go at you.
It was supporting you.
Oh, oh I see now. The arrow up was pointing at your reply sammi - not chels - we just posted at the same time.
It should read ("See now, Sammi, Jo, what you said was legitimate reasoning").
I'm all for a more open RYL, as I'm sure you know by now. This thread is giving more people the opportunity to voice their opinion on the subject, when they many not have felt comfortable posting it in that thread and further derailing it. Having a thread like this gives everyone the opportunity to have a say, including the mods, who have said that the more graphic ones are too much.
