Ended up binging tonight *___* I'm so nervous about the doctors, too! Had some really shocking news today which I'm finding it hard to get my head around. I don't really know what to do with myself at the moment... I just feel like purging.
Yeah. Mum is a wreck, Nan is just like :| & I'm all wtf?
Nan said I am being very compassionate & kind when Mum has treated me so badly in the past. I don't think I am. I feel sorry for her & I feel angry because I've tried to hold things together for so many years &. I don't really know what to do.
I know it's big news and a lot to get your head around.
But right now. You just try and concentrate on you. Your health is what is important right now, if you are not well, then what? you feel worse in yourself. Thats never good.
Please take it easy, take a step back and look at what is best for YOU
GP diagnosed me with Bulimia - I have a month to try & learn about it, work on things like having something small for breakfast to try & keep down (like yoghurt or milk), stuff like that. The waiting list for the ED unit/services are quite long, & she hopes that we can get control of this before it gets to that point.
Care co. said I don't have an eating disorder, I'm fine, GP doesn't know what she's talking about & ignore her.
Tempted to listen to care co. & just carry on with how I am. So much is happening & I don't know how to deal with it.
Firstly I'd say to listen to your GP and try and work on what she's suggested. How are things going?
You do have a problem and you deserve to get better so much. There's no need to be sorry for posting
What's going on at the moment?
I've only just read this and the way the nurse spoke to you is awful, I hope you made a complaint, if not for yourself then to stop her speaking to anyone else that way.
It sounds like you have a good GP there, could you get them to speak to your care co.? How's the suggestion of breakfast going?
ah. i don't even know what's wrong. i'm just scared & getting angry & negative with myself & blah. i can't see this ever ending. it doesn't help that i talk to people who may not exactly be helping my recovery but i feel so guilty if i don't help them... :\
I really do appreciate all your support guys, please don't feel I'm being ungrateful by not replying quickly. I just, have no words. Tried to rant, couldn't even work that out.
I'm really scared of being triggering too o.O Sorry. How are you all?
You aren't triggering and you are ill and you need support. Pm me at any point, I know I'm not at my best right now but I have been through spells of bulimia recovery so might be able to help a little.
'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'
['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']
'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell. Oscar Wilde
Its hard to dance with the devil on your back. Sydney Carter
not sure what to say. never heard of care co. is there a reason they would disagree with a medical opinion. even if, big IF, the doctor was wrong there is clearly somehitng that warrnts them saying it.
Chels.
I love you & I'm here for you whenever.
I know this isn't a great reply but I wanted to tell you to keep fighting girly, we all believe in you.
<3
