yep. i guess the main thing to focus on is the millions of women that have gone through this prior and know it is what the body is designed for.
i had my 20 week scan today everything she could check was all good. yipee. BUT bubs was shy and didn't want to show his/her bits. Thankfully (s)he was so shy (s)he didn't want to show his/her face either meaning i've to go back for another scan next week (YAY) so they can try checking the face for any abnormalities again and they said they'll check for a winkle or lack of winkle again too. It was funny booking my next appointments I've had two scans and i was booking a scan for next week and a scan for the 20th of december too to check the growth because i'm a fatty bumbum. muahhaaha. four scans baby!
but it is funny the dr was like "so your scan showed everything was normal, and your blood pressure is good even though there is a history of high blood pressure in your family, and your urine is clear, when did you start feeling baby move? oh.. ok.. um, and stomach aches? no? oh. how about any bleeding? no? oh. he sounded somewhat disappointed that i wasn't more exciting or rubbish at carrying this baby because i'm big. I was like. no problems, i walk to and from work and then stand for 8 hours+ per shift and i've been doing 50+ hours a week. the sonographers keep saying how it's a very active baby and everything is good. and my morning sickness has finally stopped. other than sounding disappointed that everything was going fine he was a nice man. I'm sure he was just trying to be thorough. The last dr didn't ask me anything just gave me a sheet on gestational diabetes pretty much.
And i accidentally touched a midwife's boob when she was taking the blood pressure cuff off. lol.
i had an epidural in so i didnt feel the crowning, but i did eventually take over from the midwife in terms of pushing. she had been telling me when, but then i started telling her when it was time accurately so she let me get on with it.
i pushed for 40 mins pain free. i could feel a lot of pressure, that was it. at one stage she mentioned an episiotomy and i apparently shouted at her DO NOT CUT ME. i dont remember shouting, but i was knackered after a long labour so im not surprised.
anyway, i saw her head in a mirror, a felt her coming out and even though she was my first i escaped with no tearing or episiotomy, i think because i took my time with the pushing as i wasnt in pain, i just followed the midwifes instructions. came out with just some grazing, which incidentally is really freakin sore because they dont stitch that so its left open. they kept me topped up with pain relief til i left, then at home i had to learn the shower trick as i was too sore to pee without. it was such a relief, i thought how am i going to pee when its this sore and went to bed dying for a pee the first night cos i just couldnt go, but turning the shower onto cold and directing the stream made it entirely possible and it wasnt really painful anymore. i did that until the grazing was healed enough to pee without pain.
id love another baby, but we have decided to get married first. maybe when freyja is in school i will try again.
"When I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you" - Dr Samuel Loomis
ah so many choices of what to do :s my friend had bad tearing... she said she basically had one hole. she also said she had 60 stitches... she is a bit of a bullshitter though so i don't know, i tend not to listen too much to her. she still puts herself and any boy before her kid too which drives me mad, but it's her life and her choice.
marriage is exciting! do you know what kind of wedding you want?
ah i think we all know one of those kinds of people! they gotta top everyone.
i had a friend who had a really fast labour, and her baby flew out before the midwife arrived. she tore badly because of how quick her son came, but she didnt dwell on it at all in fact shes trying for another and her son is younger than my wee girl.
i am getting a bit stressed about the wedding already tbh! i dont have lots of cash and was going to invite just family (parents, siblings and plus ones) to the ceremony and have a bigger reception. but apparently that is wrong and rude! i have family members i dont really care about inviting but i have to invite if i invite others, so its getting a bit irritating.
been engaged for 5 years though, think its about time. went to the doctors today and giving up smoking in anticipation of it (im not smoking in my wedding dress!! seriously though, for freyjas sake). i also managed to get a referral to the plastic surgeons about the scarring on my arms. im really worried about it spoiling the way i look on my wedding day.
"When I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you" - Dr Samuel Loomis
your wedding day is for you and your future hubby. but i have italian family so COMPLETELY understand the "why didn't you invite your 3rd cousin 22 times removed who lives in naples and can't speak a word of english?!" "brute figore!!!" just don't let people force it to be something you don't want.
Stopping smoking is great! my baby's dad has just quit... he's stopped for one week now. but no doubt he'll start again and it'll be my fault again :/ the other thing that's good if you quit smoking is that your recovery from any surgery you do have will be much easier and quicker :) bloody supply blah blah blah. :)
and i don't think i'll be trying for another one any time soon. i'm not with the baby's dad now and i don't want 5 kids with 5 different dads... and to be honest i am that sick of being let down i'm staying away hopefully for good.
yesterday i got "if i was there for you again like i was before will you not move away?" today i asked if i could see him for a little bit because i was feeling really down and lonely and i got told that he couldn't because he was gonna have dinner at his mates (where he'd been all day) and then he was going to a beer festival, when yesterday he didn't even have bus fare. Yup I feel SOOO supported and reassured that you're going to be there and not put alcohol first. *sigh* it wouldn't be so bad but the only days i'm allowed to contact him are tuesday, wednesday and thursday as it is and we talked about the fact that i feel isolated and alone and i hadn't seen him for 6 weeks other than a midwife and a hospital appointment and that's why i'm moving... to get the support i'm going to need when the baby comes because i can't rely on him to be there. It's all bullshit.
aww brilliant! that makes life easier. my niece has been hit by the jealousy of having a little sister. Brother said she had the BIGGEST tantrum ever because her sister got picked up and she didn't. to be fair though, 3 adults and two kids... haha, i'm a pushover i cuddle her ALL the time when i get to see her and anything she wants she gets. muahaha spoiler! Jayden is a cute name though. we're still battling with names! and one i've got is SO pretty if i don't use it my friend says she's gonna steal it :(
:) no problem. I am the link master. lol. but i found a few articles on there interesting, one potentially triggering if you suffer from an ED so be careful ok?
aww brilliant! that makes life easier. my niece has been hit by the jealousy of having a little sister. Brother said she had the BIGGEST tantrum ever because her sister got picked up and she didn't. to be fair though, 3 adults and two kids... haha, i'm a pushover i cuddle her ALL the time when i get to see her and anything she wants she gets. muahaha spoiler! Jayden is a cute name though. we're still battling with names! and one i've got is SO pretty if i don't use it my friend says she's gonna steal it :(
aww she will get used to it im sure, its a huge change for them. when I had my third child, my second daughter cried every time I picked him up. This time she couldnt care less! What names do you have?
Differences...are nothing at all if our aims are identical and our hearts are open. GOF
Albus Dumbledore
oh i'm sure she will too. and soon enough there will be a baby at mummy's house and at daddy's house. I'll still be spoiling her though. heehee.
if it's a girl i really want to call her Ava Rose. I could be underhand, knowing the dad won't be there when I register him or her, and name him or her whatever I like but I don't want to do that. Although after having him standing over me and screaming at me today I would like to hit him with something hard!
so how many sons and daughters do you have now, how old are they?
I was really scared I'd be unable to do anything but I've had more chances to look after my niece now and if my mum trusts me alone with her in the tub when she doesn't trust my brother (her dad) I must be doing ok.
I know looking after someone else's child for a few days is vastly different from having your own but i was scared I wouldn't know how to change a nappy or know how warm to have the bath or how to get her out of the bath or know what she wants or anything at all. Go low self esteem go! Now I've just got to wait for this little one to kick it's way out. Seriously! everything I read seems to say first time mums often don't feel anything until week 22. Week 16 I thought i felt things. Week 17 I knew! Now nearing the end of week 20 and the little monster has been wriggling and kicking since week 18. haha clever naughty baby.
fran that's normal!!
most hospitals show oyu how to change a nappy and how to bathe a baby, also they will help with feeding and go through sterilisation stuff incase you want to use bottles or express milk.
also, you can buy some little things to help, a bath thermometer - we got one for 99p at morrisons, iun the shape of a duck, it floats and has a green and a red patch, green is ok red is too hot - its a traditional 'expanding fluid' thermometer, but as well as numbers on the side its coloured green and red.
all i would say is at bathtime, have a large towel for yourself and 2 for baby, one to wrap in and one to lie them on, the big towel to protect yourself from getting soaked.
you can use an adult bath-tub (there are safety tips available) if you want or what i did with both kids, i bought a cheap washing up bowl they only have to sit in it as you wash their hair whilst holding them wrapped in a towel under oyur arm. at 8 weeks or so they outgrow their bowl and graduate to family bath-time!
Mand, South Wales, Full-time working, single mother to 2 scarily independent girls.
I AM A PROUD PLUMERIA SISTER
well i'll be moving back to my parents at 7 months and they have lots of the stuff already for when my niece stays (she's nearly 15 months) such as baths changing table etc. obviously i'll be getting a "new" cot and brand new mattress.
We laid her towel out on the bed and then i laid her towel against my front, picked her up and cuddled her to me and wrapped it all up to keep her snug. I managed to not get wet at all. and when she sneezed with a mouthful of food she was looking at my mum so she got the full spray. haha. So I only got wet when she peed on me (her daddy put on the nappy).
I've seen those ducks and was relieved when I saw them!
I had my first "I LOVE this baby and I want them here now in my arms for a big cuddle" yesterday when I was walking to work. It was completely unprompted and unexpected. And I was SO relieved. All my feelings around this pregnancy have been confused and it's been very stressful from my parents more or less disowning me to them coming round and the dad leaving me to go back to his ex (twice) and him swapping from "my baby my baby" to "i don't even know if it's mine". And because he's been at his girlfriend's all weekend he won't answer his phone and just said contact me after the weekend so I don't even know if he'll be at today's scan or if I'll be going alone. Although I know it'll be alone. :/ oh well. everyone's always nice there and i don't have to wait an hour to see the consultant this time it's just the follow up scan. I'll just bring a magazine.
I hope everyone's little ones are doing well and not causing too much havoc. and those with children in school, I bet you're glad half term is over!
Hey Girls,
Sorry I've not been on here in a couple of months properly - I've had a really stressful time & had to move just under a week ago! I'm now 28 weeks & 5 days - Time seems to be flying! How are you all?
I'm doing alright, settling into the new place, much nicer here thats for sure! I'm struggling abit with SPD, does anyone have any ideas on what I can do to help myself whilst I wait for pyshio to come through? (It seems to be taking forever.)
I'm getting a 4D scan done on friday, that my mums paying for - very excited to see little one again!
glad you're in a nicer place. I don't know anything to help with SPD i'm afraid. Sorry. That's great you're getting a 4D scan, I thought you had to be at least 32 weeks to get good results with that. I'm sure it'll be brilliant either way. I've just had my follow up scan and can now say everything is fine. and I know the gender. had to go alone though and waiting for the dad to get in touch before i tell anyone (other than my mum of course!)
I'm glad you can now safely say that everything is fine! Sorry to hear you had to go to the scan alone. The 4D scan cut off point for the place I'm going to is 32 weeks, and they say to do it between 26-32 weeks, so i think I should be okay at 29 weeks lol - at least I hope so!
It's just gonna be nice to be able to show my mum a dvd of the little man moving as she's disabled and terminally ill and hasnt been able to see any of my other scans being done. xx
