okay so i made a post in my journal last week called "Too much Drama!!" and well i thought that was bad but things just seem to be getting worse and worse!
you might want to read the journal first so you have a jist of whats going on (
http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum...hp?userid=3536 ) but please be careful because it can be very triggering!!
anyway yeah the added **** thats gone on this week is that my friend who used to self harm (wrist bang) has just started doing it again,, well cutting not banging,, and on thursday after we had been out to a club she came into my bedroom with blood dripping down her arm and asked me to bandage her up!! well i did it because she was bleeding everywhere and i thought okay shes done it now,, me helping isnt going to make me feel even more triggered or shitty than i already do now... so yeah i bandaged her up,, grabbed my razors and locked myself in the bathroom and started self harming.. they were pretty bad and i nicked a vein so i was like,, **** i need to go to A&E... when i get there it was kinda busy,, u know drunken injuries and so on but i was seen right away.. i was stitced up,, bandaged and then allowed home (i didnt have to see someone from DPM cuz i had only been there on monday,, 3 days before) when i came out i got 5 missed calls and like 15 text messages from my flatmates as they'd obviously seen my car was gone and that i hadnt come back in from the cigarette i told them i was going for...
anyway since then things have been so awquard between my and the girl who came into my bedroom.. i really cant stand the sight of her right now and i dont know if thats BPD talking u know the extremes between feelings and so on but i really just wonna knock the bitch out... urgh i just cant believe that after everything that happened the week before,, and after me telling her that it triggers me so much to see her cuts,, she comes into my bedroom like that =S and she makes someone like me and you who's reading this look like a ****,, i mean we struggle with self harm on a daily basis and it is a major issue for us and she just does it as a whim and them goes and seeks attention for it?!?!
im just so angry right now...
is it just me who feels sickened by what my friend did or would anyone be the same in this situation???
