hiding my cuts or reasuring a friend i am not suicidal.

[BelleRaven]

okay so I am deciding to go back to my marital art training despite my cuts and scars. I have three close friends there and one of them is my SI support(phil). I recently talked to him about one of our friends and him finding out I SI. because his gf recently hung herself in his room and phil said it might be worrying for that friend if he saw my cuts at training.

I am worried that,that friend will worry alot because of his gf recent suicide. and ontop of that he is only 20. too young to deal with this suicide and SI (im 19 and phil is 23 my third buddy is 35).

if he were to guess somehow what these cuts are how can I reassure him I am okay. all I can think of is he will stop worrying when my cuts go away but even then he might assume I am suicidal like his gf was and worry.

[Fry]

I don't think that you should lie and say that you are 'fine' but talk to him and reassure him that you aren't suicidal. That's assuming that you aren't? Even if you are it still might be an idea to talk to him about your feelings. It may be that he doesn't even notice the cuts etc and if he does he may not want to discuss it at all!
I know you say that he is 'only 20' so wouldn't be able to cope with it, I have to say I disagree with that. You're a year younger and you're dealing with the feelings that bring you to hurting yourself. He's a grown man so I'm pretty sure he could hack it.

xx

[~hunni~]

I can see that it could be a difficult situation, but you can't always protect people or stop them worrying about you. He might jump to conclusions, but if you're open with him and explain what it is that you're going through, he will probably understand. It might not be an easy thing for him to deal with; it's not easy too watch someone you care about hurt themselves and his girlfriends suicide might make it harder for him. But I think you have to remember that it's difficult for you too, and I don't really think it's fair on you to not go to your training if this is the only thing you're worried about.
Take care
xxx

[Gone.]

I agree that you cannot always protect people from what they are going to feel. I don't think being twenty years old means he is too young to deal with anything like this, he has no choice because of his girlfriend and you are dealing with issues whilst being a year younger. Whatever the reasons were that she hung herself, they weren't anything to do with you. I think that you should attend martial arts training again if it is something that you enjoy.

You appear to be quite close to Phil. Do you think that you could talk to him about this? Don't deny everything and say that you are fine when you aren't. Just keep yourself safe and let the other guy know that you do care about him, but want to continue martial arts training. You could even try talking to the other guy?

Take care xx

[still hurting]

just tell him you're a cutter and not suicidal, flat out honest communicstion can be akward and uncomfortable but really will make things better for everyone

[BelleRaven]

thanks y'all for your comments! I think I will just got to training and if my friend asks I will see how things go.