*hugs*
Sorry you're finding this so hard, and I'm sorry that they're still being so horrible. Did you speak to someone about it today? I do understand that it seems like hurting yourself would help, but I also think that you do see the point in trying not to - since you're posting here, and you're trying so hard. You're doing brilliantly, and it will get easier. Keep trying to find other ways of coping. If you do cut, please take care of them, but either way, just be safe, look after yourself. You know where I am, 'kay? xxx
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