feel like crap

guiltyinnocence · 03-03-2009, 11:23 PM

i just feel like crap

my sleepings all screwed up meaning im constantly shattered but still struggling to get sleep

i just want to give up, but my dads birthdays in 2 weeks so i know iv got to try and keep myself afloat for that long

im seeing my gp tomorrow but deep down i think i know i wont tell him how bad things are getting...mainly cus iv no idea what to say

it feels asthough im lost in my own little world and i cant connect to anyone outside. its like im not living in the world everyone else is and because of that i cant connect at all or explain myself.

and then theres all the thoughts and the paranoia and all that stuff

and uni, which im behind in, and still not done my courseowork and still struggling to attend lectures/seminars

i just want a hug, or anything...i just dont want to feel so alone and lost in this world iv created

littleone · 03-03-2009, 11:44 PM

could you write down how you are feeling an show it to your gp if you feel like you won't be able to talk about how bad you are feeling?
do any of your lecturers/teachers at uni know about your feelings?
you are not alone in any of this and you shouldn't feel that you are.

i'm sorry i couldn't be much help
but i am here if you need to talk
x

fuzzy_sweets · 04-03-2009, 12:14 AM

guiltyinnocence: I'm sorry to hear that your struggling so badly. I can sympathise with being behind at Uni - but have you tried talking to you tutors/lecturers about your work? I managed to get an extention the
other week due to illness (depression). If you let them know that your struggling they can be very understanding.

As little on said perhaps you could write a note to your GP explaining how you are feeling?

Let us know how it goes x x

guiltyinnocence · 04-03-2009, 12:27 AM

thanks for your replies

i got an extension on a piece at the beginning of the term and a presentation. but i dont want to ask for anymore..i feel bad i suppose and i just really dont want to. and i know i should tell my personal tutor, but i suppose i just dont want to admit or accept that this is interferring with my uni work. silly, i know

knowing what to say is the problem though and thats still the problem even with a note. iv seen him every 2 weeks for a few months now, but things have just gotten worse. and i dont know what to say cus i said its like im in a different world. and i cant grasp hold of whats going on in my head

Katiee · 04-03-2009, 12:54 AM

Heyya,
Sorry you're feeling like this. Try your best to tell your GP what you've just told us. He'll be the best person to help you and give you the support you need. If your behind in coursework and stuff maybe you could get extra time to catch up on it, talk to your teachers if your really struggling, sweet. Take care. xx

guiltyinnocence · 04-03-2009, 01:59 AM

theres nothing more my gp can really do, im awaiting counselling and im on meds. and what iv said here doesnt make any sense, and i dont see how i can tell him something that makes no sense to me. and i also dont see a point in telling him as theres not really anything he can do.

like i said i dont want to ask for anymore extensions, im behind and its my fault and i just need to get my ass into gear and sort it. i dont want to admit to them that im struggling

fuzzy_sweets · 04-03-2009, 04:31 PM

guiltyinnocence: Your are only making things worse by not admitting you have a prob to your tutors. How can they help you if they dont know that you have a problem? At the end of the day it's up to you. But seriously I'm sure you Uni will not mind, people ask for extentions ALL the time...you aint the only one. Why add more stress to yourself by not getting an extention and rushing your work?? Also if you have more time to write your assignments they will be of a greater quality!

You say there isnt much your GP can do, but you wont kno sweetie unless you let him kno what your strugglin with. Is there a particular reason why you feel you cannot communicate with him/her?? They may be able to offer more imeddiate emotional support to you.

Also have you tried your Uni's counselling service? I know that mine offers a drop-in counselling service and perhaps yours offers a similar thing.

There are lets of avenues available if you look for them, but also you have to actually 'want' help. And I'm not saying that you do not want help,..i just question whether your afraid to seek it...correct me if I am wrong.

Hope this helps x x.

guiltyinnocence · 04-03-2009, 11:38 PM

i do want help, i really do. and i know that in the end the only person that can sort me out is me, other people can help me but in the end it is all down to me. i know that and i understand that. but right now i am going through a really shit time

i do need to talk to my personal tutor and i know that, but its hard. i think i am going to email him tonight and explain a few things. extension wise, im still not keen on asking for one, it feels wrong, makes me feel bad and pathetic. so im just gonna have to deal with having a few late submissions and only being able to get 40%

there isnt any other immediate support he can offer, iv been seeing him for months and all he can do is see me, give me meds and refer me. unfortunately i missed my appoinment today but im going to try and get one on friday and just tell him things are getting worse

as for uni counselling, iv written down the number and have the intention of ringing tomorrow or friday depending on how im doing

the probelm is no matter how much i want help when my head goes to that place just getting myself out of bed is an acheivement

im sorry, this has turned into such a rant

fuzzy_sweets · 05-03-2009, 01:09 AM

guiltyinnocence: it's great that you got the phone number for your Uni's counseling! And I hope that you find them useful.

As far as extentions go - if you get a sick notes off of your Dr on Fri,...you shouldn't loose any marks. I seriously think that it's worth a try!

Also don't worry about 'ranting' we are here to support you and sometimes it helps to explore how you are feeling.

Let us kno how it goes.

x x