Triggering (Sexual Abuse) - I'm being manipulated again
I'm too nice & too scared to say I don't want to meet up with him again.
I'm actually terrified. My ex,, raped me etc... && now hes contacted me & won't leave me alone, he keeps calling even though its been a year & a half since I last saw him. He says he'll be where were meant to meet anyway so "I'll feel guilty if I don't go" & he wants to pick me up && drive me.. somewhere
I can't say no, I feel so scared, he lives near me so I can't exactly make him angry... I don't know what to do. I keep putting it off to "next weekend" but this time its not working & he said he knows I'm in town on Wednesday (for a job interview) so he's going to be there...
I feel so stupid, I can't say one simple word; NO. Maybe I want it,, eugh
*Offers you hugs* I'm so sorry you are in this situation, you sound truly terrified and I wish I could say/do something that would help you. I really hope you don't go to meet him or feel you have to because he doesn't sound like a nice person at all, especially after what he did and now he can't even respect that you've said no and he's told you he'll turn up anyway, just to make you feel guilty.
Have you got anyone that can come with you to the job interview so that you will feel safer or so that if you do see this boy, there will be someone with you? Maybe that would help because then it won't just be you saying no?
You sound very afraid of what he may do if you say no and I hear that, but I'm also really concerned about if you do go. I don't mean that to scare you. Is there anyone you can trust to tell them what is happening and that you are scared to say no? It's so understandable why you are scared to say no, I wish I had magical powers that meant it would be easy just to say no.
I understand why you feel you can't say it, don't worry. He's obviously scared you so much in the past that you're scared of what'll happen if you say no. But I urge you not to go. If he's hurt you before, there's nothing to stop him doing it again.
How would you feel about telling the police? I know that sounds really scary, but if they are aware of the situation, it can be properly sorted out. Until then (if you do decide to do it), try to stay out of his way. Always be with someone when you're out of the house.
**Holds you**
Take deep breaths hunny.
Don't meet up with him. In the morning, text him, just say that you cant meet him now/you can't make it? You dont have to give a reason, he doesnt deserve a reason. Could you invite a friend over/ make sure you out/distracted at the time he said he's coming round? Put a cd/mp3 on full blast?
Dont go hun. Even if he still comes by, you dont have to do anythign you dont want to, dont answer the door, dont get in the car ect. Don't worry about making him angry ect.
**cuddles**
Stay safe babes ly
xx
I'm too nice & too scared to say I don't want to meet up with him again.
