Ever find yourself flirting with a guy/girl and then have the "oh, f*ck" moment when you realise the first time they see you naked they're going to get one hell of a shock?
No?
Just me?
I've used every scar reduction product on the market and I'm still left with thick, white lines all over my arms, stomach, and the tops of my thighs. Yeah, they're flat. Yeah, they're white, old, healed. They're still visible and I doubt they'll ever go away. I wish they would.
i tend to push ppl away before it even gets near a relationship.
my friend tho who used to sh, has major scarrage and she jhas a lovely bf, as do loads of peeps on this webite so try not let it affect anything :) if he/she is a good person then it shouldnt matter xx
this pic is so i can always remember jen who was my l'il sock monkey friend who has left ryl and i miss her!!!
i used to avoid letting people see for as long as possible, and i have experienced crap, from 'friends' and one girlfriend, about my cutting.
i think that nobody deserves to be that close to me because of my emotional state, and the self harm, and the suicidal urges. i don't think thats me being down on myself; i think its a realistic assessment of how much work and potential pain i would put them through.
i'd like to think though, that when my scars are old and healed ('scars' rather than 'wounds'), that i will still be able to find a partner who will love and accept me in spite of everything. do i deserve that?
I only have a problem with my scars in relationships if the other person has no experience or understanding of SH.
One guy I was with had a fascination with my arm SH scars, bizarre having someone with such a different view to them as me..
It's all interesting.
for me it would depend on the person really.
someone that doesnt know anything about SI i would be hesitant to let them see, but i might not be as worried with someone that is more familiar with SI.
but in general id probably be hesitant to let anyone see.
My fiance knows of my problems past and present. She knows I have used SH as a way of coping. she understands and is not judgemental and does not look on it as stupid or anything.
Work dont know. they dont need to. I dont hide scars from anyone but I wont explain them to some people. They just dont need to know.
hush little baby, don't say a word, and never mind that noise you heard
it's just the beast under your bed, in your closet, in your head
I think if you get the right perosn i does not matter.
I think i would be really nice to have a BF how had experience of self-harmed or did them self would really be able to understand is that strange
Don't walk behine me I might got you lost!
Don't walk in front of me I may not follow you!
Don't walk beside me the path is to small!
All we can do is walk our own paths,remember your not alone because we are all walking our own paths together!
It really depends on the person. I haven't had experience with boyfriends, so I wouldn't know if they cared or not that I cut.
Something I've noticed though, is that they seem interested in the scars. This one girl in my class told everyone she used to cut, and all of the guys around her grabbed her arm to look at the scars. It was really weird. =/
Mine doesn't get upset about my scars. We talk about them and he knows the stuff that's happened. He just gets upset about fresh cuts/scabs and the fact that I still cut.
I still refuse to let him see my body, just because I can't bear to look at it either because the scars remind me of bad things and I just think they're horrible to look at and make me look like some kind of Frankenstein's monster.
AMY.
You're not as messed up as you think you are,
Your self-absorption makes you messier.
Just settle down and you could feel a whole lot better,
Deep down, you're just like everybody else.
I have depended on the person just because of the mere fact it never bothered my ex he always knew of my self harm but i think it helped he had done it before
i think it wud be totally different if they hadnt had any experience of it before i dnt know i cant even tell some mates yet so you dont know i guess
To be honest, the only people I hide my scars from are family and healthcare professionals.
I've never had a bad reaction from scars in a relationship. My partner also self harms and whilst neither likes the fact that the other feels that bad that they want to cut, but the act and the scars don't bother us. I like it like that, we're both open and honest with each other.
This is always one of my biggest worries going into relationships. The only person i was ever prepared to show my body too, voiced his negative opinion on self harm just in time for me to realise that showing him scars would have been the worst thing in the world.
I'm hoping one day i will find someone who accepts my scars as part of me, but first of all i have to be comfortable with them, before i can expect another to be.
"I'll lean on you and you lean on me and we'll be okay"
Well mine are kinda hard to miss as they're on my arms! the ones on my stomach are from ops, not si. So when I met my current partner (now fiance) he asked what they were from so I just told him everything there and then, thinking that it could get serious and if he knows and can't handle it then he can **** off... that was two years ago and we're getting married in december!
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
I dunno, it depends on the person. I'm pretty open when it comes to talking about my scars, but it takes a bit for me to show them off or call attention to them. Mine are mostly on my legs, so they're easy to hide since I wear jeans all the time. I've never had a bad reaction to them, as all of my partners tell me that they don't notice them really. =] They're too preoccupied looking at other things.
I tend to end up with/ attracted to guys and girls that are a bit...eccentric, haha. So I worry less.
As it is I'm reluctant to reveal my body to anyone I don't trust completely anyway, so there would be no shock, anyone seeing me naked would be informed of the what they're getting before they get it, if they run away then so be it, I wouldn't blame 'em.
I panicked when my fiance and I started getting in to an actual relationship...instead of just the friends thing. It turned out to be okay. He didn't ask me or push about it. He just waited until I was ready to tell him even though he had noticed long before I told him.
If he/she loves you then they will understand. You'll find someone.
It's always depended on the person with me. Some people react better than others. I've told one or two people to stick their head somewhere dark and close to home because of how they've been. But by and large the people I've been with have been supportive, and amazingly understanding.
If this is all a dream and you're not quite what you seem then I'll sleep in vain
this pic is so i can always remember jen who was my l'il sock monkey friend who has left ryl and i miss her!!! 
