it bothers me that I'm not bothered by it

[blind at heart]

~first off I see no point in labeling this as triggering for SI seeing as were in the self injury forum

it's a little unsettling that I find self mutilation normal. I feel like I should feel disgusted or afraid or some negative emotion towards it but I don't. y doesn't it bother me? it's just another thing tht happens. just another occurence. it's obviously not normal though. it's wretched. but it doesn't bother me. alright I'm done my statements are one big circle now. but does anyone understand what I'm trying to say?

[Stellata]

It doesn't bother even a small part of you that you're hurting your body to feel better emotionally?
Sounds like it's become a deeply ingrained habit for you. How long have you been self harming?

[forged]

If you're not bothered by it, why do you feel bothered because of it? That's my first question.

Now, that's how I felt when I first started (and for a few months following) - It's because it's the ONLY way you feel you are able to cope with your emotions etc. It's entirely normal.

Now, I don't think saying you should stop and such will help. It's blatant it won't. Why? You feel it's normal to be doing what you're doing.

But I will say this; Self-Harming will end up destroying your social life, and as an effect; destroy your self-esteem, your motivation for doing things and possibly more. It's not a good thing to do, but it's a release.

Tell me if this doesn't make sense xD
(It doesn't even make sense to me, but i'm posting it anyway!)

[blind at heart]

I know tht it should bother me. it doesn't tho.
like 2-3 years

[blind at heart]

I'll let it slide because ur picture is epic O_o.
I feel like I should be bothered about it. it's wrong. it's like (alright this is gonna be the shittiest analogy ever lol) a ****in cheat code to life. we are made with emotions so that we can better ourselves by dealing with and overcoming our feelings. and to hav something that just takes away everything is unnatural. but I understand all this I get it. but it still doesn't bother me. I don't feel guilty. idk. is this makin sense

[Stellata]

What things about life and in your life DO bother you?

[Katiee]

I understand what you're trying to say, yes.
I feel the same. You feel like you should hate it and everything, but you don't because it helps you cope when nothing else can.

[blind at heart]

katiee I think I was tryin to say that I just couldn't get it out
stell I hav a huge problem. the biggest **** just went down in my life. and the only thing that doesn't change or doesn't judge me and stays with me regardless of the circumstances is cutting.
the story is way to long. it in my thread on serious discussion and advice