i dont thnk its that accurate though cos ive seen people who are poroperly manic in hospitals and i am not like that!!
the score is too hgh to be true because im not that bad like the people in hospitals
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
Though the last time you were in hospital you needed to be injected because you couldn't calm down, and it even worried you at one point because you couldn't stop moving.
But don't compare yourself to others, it's not good.
We can all see, here, that you are definitely experiencing a much higher level of mood, restlessness and energy than is 'typical' and over the past few months you have had a few episodes like this which get followed by a deep depression where for a while you do realise that you were manic, but at the time you cannot see it.
Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back, everything is different…
you once called your brain a hard drive, well say hello to the virus.
yeah, that was really horrible !! but they sid i was just overtired and that nurse said i was puting it on! (LOL!) i didnt put it on but maybe I was just overtired?! its a psych hospital, surely if they thought mania the the psyc would hav mentioned it thennext day? but no one ever talked about it apart from the night staf asking me ho i was the next night.
So on a ward full f mh people they thought i was overtired. well, not all of them but most of them!!
its hard not to compare cos whenive seen manic people, in hospital before tey are really ill and im still functioning and stuff!
Even if I wa s hypomanic or manic or whatevr, I feel awesome!!! so why would i want it to stop!?
why woudl anyone want this to stop?!?!
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
Because what goes up must come down. You might be feeling great now but the higher you get the more depressed you'll feel afterwards. And you hate feeling depressed. Which is why it makes sense to try and control this now.
From what I understand pressured speech is where you are talking rapidly, with urgency, words falling over one another like you are trying to cram as many words as possible into a breath. (or at least this describes me when I'm told my speech is pressured).
Remember one of the last times that you did a hypo/mania quiz and you scored highly and you told us you were fine and the quiz was wrong. Then a few days later you thought differently about it?
I understand the dilemma of "I feel awesome, why should I do anything about my mood". For me driving force is regret, I have done many things I'm ashamed of. I've spent stupid amounts of money. Hurt people. Done things that have risked my life, my job, my career. For me it doesn't always stay euphoric, as my mood continues to elevate it starts to turn dysphoric and I get paranoid and agitated and it is horrible. There is also the risk of a massive crash. Prolonged hypomanic/manic episodes aren't good for you physically either. The lack of sleep, moving, speaking, being at a fast speed takes its toll on your body, I can only think this would be more so when you have a physical conditional also.
ugh! health advisor at the clinic aked the doc to look at mhy stitches ebcaus i thought t looked infected ad he said i t loooked alrright but gave me antibiotics just in case and i dont agree with 'just in case' antiobiotics or antibiotics in general because i never take the even whn they say it importnt and thats why ii have sucj an awesoem immune system!!!
but now its started leaking yellow stuff again and its like....wtf is going on??!??!
but its weird cos its leaing in really specific places and only the bottm half of the cut is really hot and the rest is fine!!!
wht the hell!?!?
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
From what I understand pressured speech is where you are talking rapidly, with urgency, words falling over one another like you are trying to cram as many words as possible into a breath. (or at least this describes me when I'm told my speech is pressured).
Remember one of the last times that you did a hypo/mania quiz and you scored highly and you told us you were fine and the quiz was wrong. Then a few days later you thought differently about it?
I understand the dilemma of "I feel awesome, why should I do anything about my mood". For me driving force is regret, I have done many things I'm ashamed of. I've spent stupid amounts of money. Hurt people. Done things that have risked my life, my job, my career. For me it doesn't always stay euphoric, as my mood continues to elevate it starts to turn dysphoric and I get paranoid and agitated and it is horrible. There is also the risk of a massive crash. Prolonged hypomanic/manic episodes aren't good for you physically either. The lack of sleep, moving, speaking, being at a fast speed takes its toll on your body, I can only think this would be more so when you have a physical conditional also.
people have been fingding me hard to undersatn but its just like everyone is all sluggish and everything and just dont 'get it' and they arent really paying attention to what im saying and thats why!
i scored 66 and apparenyyl thats severe mania theere is no way in hell this is severe mania!!!
i dont know what a doctor could do though?! theyd only realy be able to give me sleeping pills!!!
and ill just get a lectue about epielpsy and sleep and stuff, like i could sleep if i tried!! LOL!!!
but yeah...its like, I feel awesome right now and what could a dcotr do if they believed i was hypomanic??!
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
It wasn't so much the score that I thought would be of use but if you took it along to the GP they could see some of the symptoms you were/are displaying and see the connection also the quizzes sometimes highlight things you don't necessarily notice.
Did you ever get a letter from the private pysch you saw who recommended you taking an additional mood stabiliser?
thats a good idea i'll try and print something out or i make note s sometimes of all the idea s and inventions and thing s i have to do os i could take those?!
i dont know.
i dont want it to stop! i love feeling so happy and everthing is so bright and clear and i can actually think properly for once!
she said she'd send a email so il ask my regular gp when shes back if she has it
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
I read a book by the leading psychiatrist Dr Kay Redfield Jamison who also has bipolar disorder. It's a really interesting book, and she makes an important point- each episode of mania a person has damages the brain and makes it more likely for another manic episode to occur. It's why it's incredibly important to seek treatment for mania and hypomania.
I understand that you feel really good, but it won't last and the higher you go the further you'll fall into depression.
Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back, everything is different…
you once called your brain a hard drive, well say hello to the virus.
