I don't feel like I'll ever recover

[Doikers]

I've been officially Mentally Ill for over 21 years .
There is no permanent Psych here.
I have met 8 Locums in 9 visits and they all change my meds to their own vision.
I have next to no support from the CMHT as they are so understaffed and under funded.

I am feeling very insecure and anxious. And VERY VERY Sad indeed.

I cannot make better words.

[Diesel]

I'm kinda feeling something similar at the minute Mark, it's horrible to feel trapped by your own malfunctioning brain, struggling to see a way out.

[iliketea416]

I really don't know what to say other than that I'm thinking of you. It's unthinkably horrible to feel as though your mental illness is trapping and defining you.

[Isoverity]

Its my opinion that a lot of the "experts" don't really know what they are doing. Maybe the protocols, advice etc you've been following don't work for you. It sounds like people seeing you throw things against the wall to see what sticks (if anything) and that's typical. "Mental illness" is often created by emotional damage that pulls the mind down into its own machinery. Finding yourself again takes a special kind of contact with inner realities. A lot of "treatment" involves either burying those realities or dredging them up the wrong way. People have to get fixed from the inside out and not vice versa. You're not hopeless. Maybe the ways you've been going are.

[HildaOgden]

I'm sorry you've had such patchy support from your cmht and psych team
I really do hope you don't give up hope
you have the dbt assessment - there''s hope in that
hang in there Mark
x