I'm really sorry as I haven't been around much, I kinda lurk around and read posts but never reply because Im scared of being wrong. However Im really struggling at the moment and I dont feel I can talk to anyone in real life.
I came back to uni yesterday and Im so homesick its ridiculous, I've felt constantly sick since Ive got here becuase Im so nervous around people, Ive got exams which I know Im going to fail as due to a stressful xmas I had very little time to revise and Im awful in exams anyway and argh.
Over xmas I seemed to eat loads, gained a small amount of weight which the folks were pleased with because apprently I need fattening up, then I hit new year and suddenly I could see all the fat again and stopped eating.
Im not sure what else to say I feel lonely, Im scared now that Im alone at uni that Im not going to eat but most of all Im scared of failing or having to drop out because I can't cope.
That's OK - you can post when you feel like it or lurk when you feel like it, there's no need to be sorry.
Have you talked to anyone at Uni - a counsellor or your tutor for example? They may be able to help and support you. It's a stressful time, so I'm not suprised you find it hard, but perhaps with some help it will get better?
I dont want a reputation at uni, I only got in because I got special consideration because during my exams my dad nearly died. I just feel like a failure.
I haven't managed to eat yet today and I need to revise cause I have an exam tomorrow yet I can't concentrate at all.
specia consideration is exactly what it says - a way of seeing past the grades to see your potential, which isn't reflected in your grades because of special circumstances. If your Dad nearly died of course it would affect your grades, so they were right to give you a place.
And that's pretty stressful in itself, let alone starting Uni and probably moving away from home. So please don't put yourself down for being stressed, anyone would be in those circumstances.
I don't think asking for help would give you a bad reputation, actually probably more a sign of maturity & responsibility. And that's why Unis have tutors, counselling services etc.
But, at the end of it all, you're unhappy. And you deserve better - please believe that and do what you need to in order to feel better, which right now might be to get some support. Then you have the chance to enjoy your time at Uni instead of just surviving it, and then you can leave behind the crap and take the good stuff with you when you leave.
I have a personal tutor whos awful and really mean, which is making me more stressed cause I think I failed my exams today and its him I have to go to get my results so Im going to stress until then. Im just gonna try and get more than 70% on my next 2 exams.
I just feel like I dont deserve help, and I'm scared to ask for it because Im scared what they'll say.
try to revise in short sessions, you'll be surprised what you take in, but don't panic, if you feel like you're beginning to panic take a deep breath and then another one if you need to. Believe me you can do this. Also you can change tutors, I did, I had one that didn't even know who I was and changed tutors and she was fantastic, it might be worth looking into? If you can't concentrate tonight, try going to bed and getting up slightly earlier in the morning, it might work rather than getting yourself stressed tonight, I may be too late this time, but if it happens again. Also I'm no good on the food front, am having difficulty myself at the moment, but try nibbling, eating tiny bits every now and then. You can do this, keep fighting and good luck with those exams, lots of hugs, Hannah
"I am me and me is good enough if I would only be it openly"
Post whenever you want and/or need, it isn;t about right and wrong here.
That feeling of lonliness is so hard (I remember feeling the same way ay uni) and in my case it just took time and lots of visits home, are you able to go home (I was 50 miles from home - went every other weekend for the whole first and second years). Rahter than making friends with the people I lived with (who I didn;t get to choose) I made friends with people on my course who at least had the same interests - you are on the same course after all.
I really feel for you so much, not being a drinker does not rule you out, if you do go out have one or two and the rest as soft drinks (nobody can tell when it is in a glass anyway).
I know food is giving you trouble but please try as your brain needs it, even if it is dry crackers or ryvita (which will make you thirsty which is good as it will force you to get the essential water you need too). perhaps keep some next to you whilst you stidy and nibble as you read.
My thoughts and best wishes are with you, all the luck in the world to you in your exams, you can only do what you can do.
In exams I always try to focus on one question at a time, don;t read ahead and panic that you do not know the next one. Look at each question as it comes, do your best on it and move on. If you have not a clue don;t sit and panic over it, move on to the next one and come back to any you have missed at the end if you have time left (this of course depends on what you are studying but this system has really helped me who gets really panicky during exams)
I am a real panicer in exams anyway which doesn't help. Ive managed to revise a fair amount today and the next exam is the one im the most confident on so Im hoping I wont be so bad. Am thinking of getting some form of help to deal with the anxiety around exams because I have panic attacks that are getting silly.
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