A couple of weeks ago i finally built up the courage to get help for everything. And then today i got the letter from camhs telling me to call them to book an appointment and if they don’t hear from me theyll assume i don’t need their help anymore. But one of the main reasons im going is because of anxiety and i cant use the phone so its completely stupid. That is enough i think to stop me going but i really want the help but i cant if i have to ring some random person to do it.
I now feel really stupid and pathetic for making something so simple into such a big deal. And its taken me so long to get this far that i am willing to get help and i cant just throw it all away. Please help? I don’t know what to do about it.
Well done for making this post. You are not stupid and you are not pathetic. I have problems with anxiety and using the phone too, so it is really hard for me to ring anybody. When I need to make an appointment or ring somebody, I usually do some deep breathing exercises to calm down and then I am able to ring. If I don't feel that I've calmed down enough, then I will get one of my friends to ring for me.
x
"How can I be a gynecologist? I can barely look a woman in the eye!"
♥
I wrote out a long reply earlier but then it didn't load! Sorry.
You aren't pathetic at all, many people find it hard to use the phone and I think it's actually very common in young people regardless of mental health problems.
What I was writing was how about asking someone else to ring on your behalf if neccessary? It's really worth it to keep this appointment and it's ok to ask someone for help to ring them up. CAMHS will understand.
If you do decide you want to ring, I would say do it as soon as possible because the longer you leave it the more your mind has time to wind you up about it and play tricks on you. The sooner you do it, the sooner the worry will be over! I have found in my experience that it's not as bad as I originally thought, not pleasant but copeable. It may help you to write down a few things that you want to say in your phone call so you know it's there in front of you should you forget or need a prompt.
Hope you manage to do it!
xxx
heya hun, your not pathetic, i was also scared of using the phone so your not alone but you know what, it's a fear you can get past. Can you prehaps get a friend to make the call if you feel you can't manage it? or somebody you live with?
One of the things i'm sure they'll tell you at CAMHS is you have to face to fear to get over it so, i'd say give it a try to ring them yourself first..but if you can't manage it, don't worry.
Good luck with it all, Stay Safe and Take Care and well done in making the first step in getting help.
Love Leighxxx
Life can be beautiful if you let it.
Step back, breathe and take it in
i doubt anyone i know in rl would take me seriously about not wanting to use the phone so i dont really want to ask them.
another question - will they want me to involve my parents? will they want a family meet thing and if they do will i be able to say no? because there is no way i will ever do that and if i have to let them be involved then i wont go and ill wait until im 18 and dont have to anymore. if thats the case then the whole phone thing wont be a problem because i wont need to make an appointment.
thanks sooo much for all the replies.
It would be entirely up to you if your parents were involved or not, however I think if it came down to matters of life or death (ie, you said you were going to commit suicide) they could then contact your parents.
I have a friend who's parents aren't involved with her care under CAMHS.
xxx
I went to CAMHS. In my own personal opinion, I didn't like it. My counsellor at CAMHS involved my parents but only because she put me on medication before I was 16 and legally responsible for myself. She did ask me numerous times if I wanted to have family therapy and on each occassion I said no and that was that.
As for not being able to use the phone, I can't do that either. Is there a teacher at school you can trust? Because I have a teacher at school who I can trust and who understands and makes all phone calls for me.
Hope this helps.
did they say yyou have a time to ring by? you might be able to send a letter in that time, explaining that your anxiety is too bad for phones and that is one of the reasons you need help. of course, because they said to phone i wouldnt count on the letter but if you send it first, if you have while before the deadline, you could see if you get a response and if not then phone before the deadfline.
Actually i think there are too many things to complicate it and i don’t think it will happen. Again because of the anxiety, that will cause a lot of problems going anyway and i will really freak – it sounds way too scary and there are many practical problems also, like how to get there and getting out of school to go – especially as i don’t want to involve my parents.
I am sooo mad with myself for wanting to pull out and i know i will punish myself lots for being so stupid but i just don’t think i can go. The help can go to someone else who needs it more (thats a way of justifying it – sort of).
You cant know how much i hate myself for this.
Please don't throw away your chance of help. Is there anybody in school you can trust? It sounds like it may be help to speak to somebody about you going to CAMHS, someone from school would be able to sort out the problems of missing school and so on. Actually, CAMHS do have after-school appointments (albeit only 4 a week) but you may not even have to miss lessons and sometimes CAMHS will come to school if it's easier, which would solve the worry of you having to get there.
I really encourage you not to give up on this help just yet. Even if you just go for that first appointment and THEN decide it's too much hassle, at least you will know that you tried and it didn't work out for you.
What is making you so afraid of your parents finding out? I'm not sure of your situation so it may be different for you but often parents can surprise us.
Is there a family friend or a member of your family that you trust? Maybe talk to them about what is going on for you.
Lotti
P.S. Nobody is going to judge you on RYL so please don't feel you have to explain yourself to us, we care about you and want to help you.
no email address that i can find - that was one of the first things i looked for.
its okay now i think, i found someone to call them for me so it should be going ahead. next big problem will be going. when you go to these places whathappens?
it was a reaaaally long time ago for me, and things have progressed mucho within CAMHS since then i believe, but when i went a CPN just talked to me and my parents for an hour, to gather bits and bobs of info about what i'd been struggling with etc. i found it quite difficult to talk in those days but it was still okay. sometimes she asked things about my childhood toilet training and stuff!
then she said she would be my CPN and i saw her around every two weeks, until things with my mental health changed. i didn't see a psychiatrist until i'd been with CAMHS for around a year and a half, but now i believe you would be assessed by a CAMHS doctor of some sort initially. could be wrong though.
My first appointment with CAMHS was just talking about my situation like who i live with, what mum does for a living, what dad does, how old my sister was, general stuff so they could build a picture.
Well done on finding someone to call for you.
Stay Safe and Take Care and GOOD LUCK! You can do this!
Leighxxx
Life can be beautiful if you let it.
Step back, breathe and take it in
My first appointment with CAMHS was talking about what problems I was having, and about my family (we did a family tree) and what they do and who I live with, and how I was finding school and stuff.
Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back, everything is different…
you once called your brain a hard drive, well say hello to the virus.
i have loads more stupid questions about this and going to see them - im sure no one else makes such a big deal about it, im just so scared about it. i dont really want to make myself look more stupid by putting them on here though because they are such trivial things so could someone who knows a bit about that sort of thing please pm me - be aware though that i have a load of really pathetic questions i need to know the answers to as i am still really unsure about whether i can cope with going or not.
thanks
i think it might be a good idea to post them on here, they're not pathetic, any questions, no matter how small, are fine. and it'll give more people opportunity to know/answer them. i'm worried about PMing incase i don't know the answers to your questions. but i hope someone is able to PM you. xxx
just questions like - when i get there what do i do? will there be a receptionist person who i have to talk to or will it be a computer signy in bit ( i got my mum to explain exactly what happened at the drs but there is noone to explain this one) im scared of doing it all wrong and looking really stupid or something.
also if i cant think/ concentrate (i know i wont be able to) will i look really stupid because i wont be able to answer simple questions or is that normal to them.
i dont know - i hate things im not used to and i havent done anything like this before. im scared its going to go all wrong. im already feeling really panicky about it and i dont even know when it is yet!
normaly there is a receptionist, all you have to do is show your letter to them or say youre name and who youve got an appointment with. Then youll usually be asked to sit in the waiting room till whoever your seeing comes for you. just remember they see lots of people and you wont be the first whos been nervous! noone will think your stupid hunny.
it gets easyer after youve been once.
is your mum coming because for your frist appointment they normally want your parents/guardiens to be there. so then you can watch what she says
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
After all this has passed, i still will remain
After i've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
