Triggering (SI/Suicide) - pretty urgent really (rantish)

[pretty_in_pain]

two attempted suicides (OD's) earlier this year.

thought i was getting better. i got my SHing down to once a fortnight.
but now i'm falling apart again. i want to die. i cant think of anything else.

yes, i've got things to live for, i know that:

an amazing boyfriend
friends
family
college
opportunity to go to uni

but nothing seems important anymore. i want to sleep and never wake up.

i wanna tell my counsellor before this gets too far, because i'm really really scared but my next appointment is next weds. so i need to know:

1.)what do i do in the meantime? is there a quicker way of getting help? a week can seem a really long time.

also,

2.) what happens when i tell someone? do they put me on medication? will they make me go to some kind of centre?

i'm rapidly and seriously losing the will to fight.

please help me?

thanks for reading
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Breeze]

How about getting an appointment with your Dr/GP tomorrow, make an urgent app with them, tell them what is going on and ask their advice also.

You also mention boyfriend family and friends. Can you sort something to do for each day. Keep your busy. Not nessisarily busy but just occupied with things.

Remember what you have managed to do so far, by reducing your SI etc. It an awful lot to achieve. It is really good hun. Hard work.

Blips are gonna happen but knowing how to get through each one is something you need to work on I reckon.

[pretty_in_pain]

yeah but my family don't know that i'm feeling like this again, and i would have to tell them in order to get an urgent appointment.

my best bet is to hold out for wednesday. problem is, im not sure if i can..........

xxx

[Kame]

Hayley, you willmake it to next Wednesday, I know you will. You can get through this, and I will do anything to help you.
Is it worth telling your family to get a more urgent appointment? If you really are at risk, then I strongly advise you do.
*Squishes*
xxxx

[pretty_in_pain]

thanks lanny, i wish i had some of your strengh babe.

im hoping i can just keep myself distracted til next week, i guess we'll soon find out............

xxxxx

[pretty_in_pain]

i'm an actress

im an amazing liar

and i'm getting sick of this.......

[ashleigh14]

i know what your going thourgh and i still feel like that so what i did was i write my feelings down in a book and it dint really work coz i felt really upset still and then i told my friends bout it n they sed tell ya mom so i did and she took me to cams on an emergancy ampointment and now i go to oakwood a young peoples centre to help me through tuff times and im getting help and i still feel like it now but then i think bout all the good things in my life and how it would make my family feel and how much stress would go on my mom and i talk to my friends when i feel like it and it helped me so much

yooh can get through this bbe i promise

[pretty_in_pain]

what if i dont wanna get through?

maybe i do

idk

im not sure i care much anymore :(

xxxx