I was just wondering... How do you tell if you are bipolar?
I never thought I was before, someone whose father is bipolar said I might be but he's like, 15, so I just ignored him.
And I know I have depression, but lately I've been wondering if maybe I was... or maybe I'm just overreacting?
I never have super "high" feelings, I'll have moods where I am super hyper and talking a ton, but not too, too often, and not like I can do tons of stuff or anything but sometimes I am more motivated to do things than others... recently I've had times when I'm super on edge, feel like I can't sit still, and really irratible.
I get really depressed, to the point were I wish I would die. Also, last week I was like... I don't know... I was watching an old episode of Intervention, where the girl cuts, which normally doesn't bother me too much, but I was feeling especially bad that day, and just kind of freaked out when I was done watching it. Like, I had to cut, but wouldn't let myself, so I was screaming, slamming my hands against the wall and the bed, shaking... I don't know why but it hasn't ever happend before... but maybe that's normal, and I'm just overreacting, I don't know.
Sometimes I feel like I'm missing a piece inside me that everyone else has, like I can't control how I feel at all...
Right now I'm on Lexapro, but I'm backing down a little on the Lexapro, maybe stopping it, I don't remember, calling the doctor tomorrow to see, and going on Abilify. I was on Zoloft, and it worked well at first, but then it was bad, I had very bad suicidal urges and thoughts, so much worse than before, felt like I was going crazy.
And lately I've been feeling almost... disconnected? I don't know why...
But I don't feel like I ever have huge massive mood swings... but I am moody. I don't know...
Sorry if this doesn't make sense the way I've written it, or if this is in the wrong place.
And I know obviously I need to go to my psychiatrist to see for sure if I'm bipolar, but I just wanted to talk to someone about their experiences with bipolar disorder, if they didn't mind sharing, and their opinions.
So sorry if I've said something I'm not supposed to! I looked over the rules but I'm a little neurotic I'll get in trouble! haha.
Also, has anyone ever been on Abilify? What are your opinions on it? I mean obviously, its different for everyone, but yeah.
Sorry this is so long! haha. I talk too much sometimes...
edit: also, I have felt depressed... but at the same time almost happy? I'm not sure why...
Last edited by RainbowVeins202 : 14-05-2009 at 01:24 AM.
Reason: added something
hiya! there are actually two types of bipolar disorder, bipolar I and bipolar II, for bipolar I you must have experienced at least 1 full manic episode, which it doesnt sound like you have, however bipolar II is associated with hypomania which is a milder form of mania. ALso another possibly is cyclothymia, but this also depends on the severity of your depressive episodes.
hope this helps a little, feel free to pm me if you want to know anything else :D
also would def recommend a chat with your psychiatrist if you feel this way
xx
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you could be experiancing hypomania, wich is a less severe form of manic, for the most part i get that, but i also get the manic.
recomending talking to your pysch, would be very good!
as for abilify, i was just on it for a week, reacted really badly to it, came off it for a few days and am now on lithium! i've tried a fair few meds! lol! everyones difference with abiliy is different, for me personally, it made me very high, but incredibly nervous and anxious, i then hallucinated, and then overdosed because i was so freaked out, the nervous energy didnt help at all! after i spent the evening in hosp, and missed my next dosage and help from my bf, decided it wasnt the one for me! but then you could react really well for it, for the first 2 days, it cleared and slowed down my head really nicely, then it all went wrong! oops!
anyways, i'm fairly newishly diagnosed, but pm me any time!
xxx
I have bipolar I-mixed. I don't ever get 'depressed' but I get wild highs once a year (although it has been almost 2 years since my last episode) which last a couple of months. The mixed part is because I am destructive manic, rather than happy manic, although my last episode was happy 'wild' manic. I can do things when I'm like that, that I wouldn't even know or have the courage (or stupidity) to do when I'm 'depressed' or just down.
I have been on abilify, but not for long,apparently it is for more psychotic symptoms, whereas I was just plain old manic grandiose lol. Lithium has been my wonder drug, I still feel down and get anxious, but am no where near as bad as I was.
Thanks for everyones comments, I really appreciate it :)
I'm definetly going to talk to my therapist about it.
Last night was weird and just... ugh. Bad. I felt like I was going crazy. I was so irritible and aggitated and I couldn't stop moving, for like, 5 minutes I just sat on the bathroom floor, rocking back and forth. It was really weird and just ugh. Not fun. I don't know what it was. I couldn't stop my brain from moving.
But maybe its just because I'm paraniod about being bipolar or something? That hasn't happened before... i dont know.
I just kindo f waited for it to stop, then lay in my bed and cried and listened to Jack Johnson till I was calm and tired enough and could be still long enough to fall asleep.
Mania is pretty extreme, and symptoms like anxiety can be pretty scary too, but don't mean you are bipolar. A friend of mine has depression and anxiety - and her anxiety attacks can be really scary.
But probably best to see your doc, as I said, my manic episodes last a month or more, though I know it does vary depending on person.
Yeah... I don't think I have bipolar... but I don't know. I've just been feeling really weird lately so idk...
I've had anxiety issues for years though. Lots of panic attacks, not ones that sent me to the hospital or anything, but trouble breathing, feeling sick to my stomach, dizzy, hot and cold, all that good stuff... this didn't feel like that... so idk :/
I was going to say, it sounds like you might have an anxiety disorder. I used to have panic attacks a lot, and although they aren't dangerous they are extremely upsetting experiences. I'm sorry you're going through that. I'm not Bipolar so I can't tell you my experience there, sorry. But you're not alone.
I was on Abilify once. I did not care for it, to say the least. It works really well for some people, though, and I was unlucky with the severity of the side-effects, but you should be aware that atypical antipsychotics like Abilify are pretty strong drugs, and they can have some nasty side-effects at first. Mostly you'll feel really really tired when you first start it, but that does go away for most people. It can also affect your blood sugar and make you crave sweet things. For some people this means they gain some weight because they eat more.
For a full list of side-effects, you can see a US patient information leaflet here.
s a r a h
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"Between two worlds life hovers like a star,
twixt night and morn, upon the horizon's verge."
- Lord Byron
There are all kinds of Bipolar, unfortunately so talking to a professional is a good idea. My bipolar is type two, but it is rapid cycling which makes it so I randomly switch multiple times a week and sometimes in a day. . . not fun, I assure you. So, if you are concerned, talk about it. Keeping things from those who are trying to help you won't get you very far.
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