Beth's really upsetting me. She really wants me to hurt someone, and I don't know how much longer I can disobey her.
I've just left the hospital after my fourth admission, two of which were a week apart. I can't handle telling anyone, like from the crisis team, because she keeps telling me they'll lock me up again.
I can't be around people. Not only am I worried I'll hurt someone, but it's so hard to concentrate and hear what they're saying when Beth's shouting at me to do something evil.
What can I do? My anti-psychotic has just been upped which has really pissed her off, and is making me feel really sedated and too weak to argue with her.
I just need advice on how to get through this. I feel so close to just ending it all, I really do.
sorry im being a little dumb, is beth like the voice in your head?
sweetie, if you are struggling to deal with this yourself then you should get some help from your crisis team. is hospital really really bad or does it help you a bit. know its scary but if beth is being a pain it may be worth it.
sending you lots of cuddles xx
this pic is so i can always remember jen who was my l'il sock monkey friend who has left ryl and i miss her!!!
hun.
if she's scaring you that much that you feel she may cause you to hurt someone or yourself you have to tell someone. please either ring the crisis team or go to A and E. i know you're scared but wouldnt you rather be safe than sorry? it sounds like you need your medication changed i its makn it harder to ignore the voice and not easier.
try to remember that YOU have control and not her, do this for yourself, go get some help.
love and hugs
PM me anytime
Yes, Beth is the voice I hear -Not in my head, I can hear her the same way I would hear you talking to me.
Hospital isn't really bad, but I just hate being there - I've been in hospital four times, and I just can't handle putting my family (or myself) through that again.
green.eyes, I have had my meds changed...I had my Aripiprazole upped.
I just don't know what to do. I don't have control, not at all.
Thank you for the replies.
Tell Beth, tell her that she's useless to you and that you don't need her. Tell her that you won't listen to her and that you will exterminate her.
As my psychiatrist said, "if the voices were singing that song about shooting the sherrif, then you wouldn't go and shoot the sherrif, would you?"
Sorry if that was entirely unhelpful. I am struggling myself not to listen to the People.
PM me if you want a PDF copy of the ICD-10or the Mental Health Act 1983/2007. I ALSO HAVE THE DSM-V BOOK and am a pharmacology student.
I have a visual impairment / neurological problems so I need people to type in clear text and no funny fonts. Also excuse any typos, my vision blocks things out.
I have autism and have problems communicating, PMs included.
Just becasue I type well doesn't mean I speak well. I am only part time verbal.
How long ago did they up your meds? they can take a while to fully kick in.
If you thnk hospital may help then i wouldn't worry about your family, i'm sure in the long run they just want you to get better and another admission now may be stressful but in a year? you need to do whatever to keep safe. can you call the crisis team? maybe they could give you something to help short term while the arpiprazole works.
please don't od, call crisis or talk to us xxx
"Because you don't notice the light without a bit of shadow. Everything has both dark and light. You have to play with it until you get it exactly right."
Only a week ago, but I don't expect them to work. I don't have psychosis, I have a gift...I can hear and talk to a dead girl. It's a gift I don't want, but APs wont help.
I'm so sick of hospitals, I can't see how they will help in the long run...They just make me feel lost.
I didn't OD last night, but Beth's as bad as ever and so I feel like today's going to be very hard. Someone from EIS is coming over, but I don't think I can tell her.
xx
You need to make sure that all people such as parents or siblings are cleared away and you need a moment with the person who will see you. You need to tell her everything. If Beth gets angry at you, you need to grit your teeth and carry on, because Beth will go away, but only if you try hard to make her go away by accepting help.
PM me if you want a PDF copy of the ICD-10or the Mental Health Act 1983/2007. I ALSO HAVE THE DSM-V BOOK and am a pharmacology student.
I have a visual impairment / neurological problems so I need people to type in clear text and no funny fonts. Also excuse any typos, my vision blocks things out.
I have autism and have problems communicating, PMs included.
Just becasue I type well doesn't mean I speak well. I am only part time verbal.
I told her how I'm not taking my meds because Beth wants me to store them to take an OD on Saturday.
She told me to give the meds to my dad and put him in charge of them, but I can't. I need to feel I'm in control.
Which I'm not, Beth is.
Give the meds to your Dad. I've seen the effects of antipsychotic overdose in a friend of mine and its horrible, really, really horrible.
Beth may be in control, but inside Beth is weak. She clings onto you like glue because she can't survive by herself. Without you, she is nothing. So if you make it known to her that you are not her property, she may die away.
PM me if you want a PDF copy of the ICD-10or the Mental Health Act 1983/2007. I ALSO HAVE THE DSM-V BOOK and am a pharmacology student.
I have a visual impairment / neurological problems so I need people to type in clear text and no funny fonts. Also excuse any typos, my vision blocks things out.
I have autism and have problems communicating, PMs included.
Just becasue I type well doesn't mean I speak well. I am only part time verbal.
this pic is so i can always remember jen who was my l'il sock monkey friend who has left ryl and i miss her!!! 
