Telling a best friend

[somuchpain88]

One of my best friends does not know that I si. He knows almost everything else that there is to know about me. I had stopped si-ing for a while, but recently started again. He commented to me the other day that he was worried because my behavior and personality have changed recently. He asked if it was because of my family problems and I said no and that it was because of other things. Well, now he wants to talk about those other things. I want to tell him that I si so bad, but I do not know how. I think that he feels he knows me so much better than he actually does. He is one of my best friends and I do not want to lose him.
Does anybody have any advice?

[behindblueyes]

I would write a letter to him, let him absorb the information. Since he knows you so well to begin with.. he might already know something like this is happening. Get out all your feelings in the letter... that ay you can get them out without any interruptions. Give him websites to go to for information if you dont think that he will understand... or so that he can better understand how to help you if you want him to. Also i would tell him it isnt his responsibility to cure you and tha t isnt the point in telling him.. you just want to confide in him so you have a shoulder to lean on every once in awhile. But also prepare youself incase he takes it negatively at first as some do when they first find out about self injury... but time and understanding should bring him back if he is a true friend.

I hope that this all works out for you and i am glad you want to tell him =)
Hope that helps, even just a little.

Take care of yourself
x Kate

[*..life in pain..*]

behindblueyes is right.i agree with everything!!im sure he will understand.
my best friend found out today and at first was so mad but when i told her that i need a shoulder to lean on she told me that she will always support me.what im trying to say is that if you explain to him why you do it and that you need his help he will understand.

[revenge]

i think its a really good thing you want to tell him, im sure it will make you feel better having him there to talk to about it..
i agree, if you don't feel comfortable with talking about it face to face and just telling him, then writing a letter is a good idea, and that way you can make sure you say everything you want to say.

remember he might need some time to adjust, and let the information sink in, because it is obviously, something really important..

although, if you're really close, he might have suspected it and just not wanted to say anything, because everyone who's ever found out about me has already suspected it...

and like kate said, try not to be hurt if he reacts negatively at first, its going to be a real shock, and im sure he'll come round to it after a while.

good luck =]
sarah
xx

[ImperfectMe]

When I told my best friend it was over msn, she was really upset and we haven't talked about it since. It was really awkward...but I agree with everything everyone else has said.
Good luck!

[Spud]

Like everyone else has said. Do it face to face or write a letter. Letters are easier generally as you don't have to face them, but they also give less chance for them to ask you things. Letters also give more time for it to sink in and for them to get their head around the whole thing.

All my friends now know about my self injury and I told them in a variety of ways, none of them have reacted that badly, and something that I've learnt is that there is never a perfect way to tell someone.
One thing I would say about a letter is if you do want to talk about it after then bring the subject up some miscommunication happened between me and my friends where we ended up not talking about, they thought I didn't want to talk and I thought they weren't ok with it so I didn't talk to them. So if a letter ideally follow with communication quite soon after.
With talking to them face to face make sure you know the key things your going to say so you don't get lost.

Really if he's your friend then he will try and understand even if its a shock to start of with. Be prepared that he may need some time to sort things out in his head.

[somuchpain88]

Thanks guys. I am planning to talk with him tonight or tomorrow night.