Ok so as the title says I basicly cant feel emotions. By now im 14 and ive been getting destroyed throught all my Life. (btw sorry this is gonna be pretty long.)
ex: dad left when i was 1yo,
i was frozen out at the kindergarden that i Went to at 2yo,
when i was 4yo i was at a new kindergarden with some good friends that i had to leave since we were moving,
when we had moved there was a bully that was way older than me at the new kindergarden, he punched me, he told me to not look up if he ever saw me do it, told me i was horrible and so on, the staff dident do anything, one day i remember he basicly tied me up and tortured me (like putting insects in my mouth and punching me every once in a while), this Went on for atleast 2 years then he moved,
when i was 7 i had to move again and i lost my great friends that i had made after that horrible time,
in 1st grade i was ignored by everyone,
2nd grade i started getting a bit bullied like Calling me bad and stupid or so,
in 3rd-6th grade it got way worse ex; one guy would punch and kick me, one guy would tell me how useless i was, i lost one of the 2 friends i had and he started bullying me too, and the staff in this school dident care at all either.
7th-now still getting punched, stealing my things, still telling me how useless i am and all of it is getting worse.
also, ive basicly lost all my friends and pets, i have one real friend.
so thats it. i Think you can see why im numb. i just want to feel again and be happy or sad or anything because i cant care or feel for anything anymore and this is my atempt to get ok Before im far to gone.
I am sorry you have a difficult childhood. I can relate because I do not feel emotions and I moved every 3 months to about a year since my dad died when I was about 2 and my mom got remarried. My step dad was an alcoholic, drug user, and more bad things. I had to turn off my emotions at a young age and I cannot figure out how to turn them back on. I have been this way since I was a child, and I am not sure if it is worth starting to feel emotions again because I have been left and taken advantage of most of the people I have been in contact with, both family and friends. Maybe we can solve the mystery of missing emotions together. what do you think?
I don't feel much emotion and it works well with me as I prefer science and strong logic.
PM me if you want a PDF copy of the ICD-10or the Mental Health Act 1983/2007. I ALSO HAVE THE DSM-V BOOK and am a pharmacology student.
I have a visual impairment / neurological problems so I need people to type in clear text and no funny fonts. Also excuse any typos, my vision blocks things out.
I have autism and have problems communicating, PMs included.
Just becasue I type well doesn't mean I speak well. I am only part time verbal.
I don't know what to suggest atm but I'll think about it and get back to you.
PM me if you want a PDF copy of the ICD-10or the Mental Health Act 1983/2007. I ALSO HAVE THE DSM-V BOOK and am a pharmacology student.
I have a visual impairment / neurological problems so I need people to type in clear text and no funny fonts. Also excuse any typos, my vision blocks things out.
I have autism and have problems communicating, PMs included.
Just becasue I type well doesn't mean I speak well. I am only part time verbal.
Ok so as the title says I basicly cant feel emotions. By now im 14 and ive been getting destroyed throught all my Life. (btw sorry this is gonna be pretty long.)
ex: dad left when i was 1yo,
i was frozen out at the kindergarden that i Went to at 2yo,
when i was 4yo i was at a new kindergarden with some good friends that i had to leave since we were moving,
when we had moved there was a bully that was way older than me at the new kindergarden, he punched me, he told me to not look up if he ever saw me do it, told me i was horrible and so on, the staff dident do anything, one day i remember he basicly tied me up and tortured me (like putting insects in my mouth and punching me every once in a while), this Went on for atleast 2 years then he moved,
when i was 7 i had to move again and i lost my great friends that i had made after that horrible time,
in 1st grade i was ignored by everyone,
2nd grade i started getting a bit bullied like Calling me bad and stupid or so,
in 3rd-6th grade it got way worse ex; one guy would punch and kick me, one guy would tell me how useless i was, i lost one of the 2 friends i had and he started bullying me too, and the staff in this school dident care at all either.
7th-now still getting punched, stealing my things, still telling me how useless i am and all of it is getting worse.
also, ive basicly lost all my friends and pets, i have one real friend.
so thats it. i Think you can see why im numb. i just want to feel again and be happy or sad or anything because i cant care or feel for anything anymore and this is my atempt to get ok Before im far to gone.
People who bully are themselves damaged individuals. At some level they recognize this and in their internal pain they attempt to project it onto others, calling their victims what they themselves, often subconsciously, believe themselves to be. You need to recognize this fact and learn to discount and ignore what they say about you.
Your numbness is a survival mechanism. By shutting down your feelings your mind is attempting to protect itself. When your environment improves, as it will, the numbness will begin to fade. You just have to tough it out until you reach that better place, as you will.
Think about the good things you do, remind yourself you're a good person and try to pity those who bully you. The world is full of them but as you move into adulthood the bullies will fall away.
