Contains alcohol - Do I need help?

[MarshallBurlington]

Hello, I'm a new RYL member and this is my first post. I'm 23 years old. I graduated college last May. I had my occasional nights of heavy drinking in college, but it hasn't started effecting my life until now. I moved from my hometown in NY to Philadelphia to start my carreer as a school teacher. My girlfriend of over a year moved here as well, we decided to start our lives together in Philly. The problems started in September. I drank to much and yelled at her for no reason. A few weeks later it happened again. She resented me for a while, but we made it through that. But last weekend I went to visit some of my friends. I drank too much with them. I went to a bar and a girl we knew from school kissed me. In the state I was in, I didn't realize what was happening until it was too late. I pushed her off and walked away, but not before someone took a picture of it and sent it to my girlfriend (the kiss only lasted about 30 seconds). I knew none of these three things would have happened if I wasn't drinking at the time. I would never yell at her for no reason or allow a girl to come anywhere near kissing me if I was sober. I didn't completely black out on these three occasions, but I don't remember every specific event of the nights. I don't rely on alcohol, I have fun without it all the time and I go weeks at a time without touching it. However, because of alcohol, my girlfriend (who i moved to Philadelphia to be with) has left me and my life seems to be in shambles. Drinking hasn't directly effected my work, but her leaving me has. I don't think I'm an alcoholic, but I think I may have an alcohol abuse problem. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

[consequential]

hi and welcome .this area of the site is really bad for replies i notice.
im sorry to hear about your gf.the person who sent that picture should get a walloping.i dont think you sound like a really bad drinker .you just sound like you have had bad luck .maybe it makes you agressive .a lot of ppl do things they regret when drinking ,i know i have .i mean i think you should talk to your gf and try and work things out ,yelling at someone isnt that bad .its normal to yell if youre angry .i think she over reacted

[Sigma]

Well, I guess the question is why you drink to the point you're out of control... because on the outside the simple answer would be don't drink enough to get drunk. If you find it difficult to restrict your drinking, then it's a problem (though not necessarily alcoholism in my opinion).

It sounds as if it's been a few months with a lot of changes - hopefully a lot of them positive, but still a lot to adjust to. Talking with your girlfriend and other friends would be a good start, but if you still struggle to control your drinking and anger then perhaps seeing a counsellor would help.

I hope you work it out with your girlfriend and you can put this behind you.