Contains alcohol - Should people be worried?

weepingangel · 24-08-2010, 10:13 PM

i've started drinking more lately. Not a lot, like i might have one or two drinks a day and then i might not drink for a few days. It sounds pretty normal and that's not really what i'm worried about but it is more than i used to.

i've started drinking in the morning. Only done it a couple of times but it looks set to become a habit. Yes i could just stop now. But i don't want to.

i drink before i've even got out of bed. i get a drink ready the night before and leave it by my bed. And in the morning as soon as i've sat up in bed i drink the drink and then i get up. i don't want to stop because i like it. It makes it easier to get out of bed, easier to face the day. It's nice starting the day with the depression numbed, pushed back out of the way by the drink.

i'm pretty sure it's making the rest of the day worse, after an hour so when it wears off. But it feels worth it.

It feels ok. But i know it isn't. i told my friend what i've been doing and she's really worried that i'm going to become an alcoholic. Maybe she has a right to be worried. i don't know.

i feel like it's ok because i don't drink much. i probably drink less than average. i just do it badly. i usually drink alone and i often just drink stuff straight cos it's easier that way [my friends inform me that both those things are weird]. And then i drink in the morning. And before Church.

i don't know, sorry to go on so much, i'm just trying to make sense of it to myself really. i feel like people might think i'm a bad person. And i don't want people to think i have a problem. My problem is the depression. It's getting worse and i'm just trying to cope with it.

88shelz · 25-08-2010, 01:27 AM

if you feel it is wrong then it most likely is.
alcohol is a natural depressant so you should be trying to stay away from it
i understand how alcohol makes you feel but it wont make anything better for you at all hun. it creates more problems

weepingangel · 28-08-2010, 08:51 PM

Haven't drunk for a little while. i miss it when i don't drink.

i know it'll make things worse if i continue to drink. And that i should be careful.

i just really struggle to actually care at the moment. Sorry i know it's horrible and stupid when someone asks something and then ignores what you say. i just don't care anymore. i want to drink. i want to die.

i'm so stupid actually. Because i know how much worse alcohol makes me feel / will make me feel and yet i'm still sooo tempted.

no point · 29-08-2010, 12:11 AM

can you substitute drinking alcohol with anything else, such as coffee? sorry if it's a dumb idea!
if you think drinking alcohol is becoming a problem for you, i think you should seek help.

weepingangel · 29-08-2010, 01:51 AM

Not a dumb idea. Although i couldn't drink coffee. i get a caffeine high from it too easily and then feel sick for ages. Which as i have a very strong fear of throwing up i can't really deal with.

i think i'm ok at the moment. i'll watch it and see how i think it is by the next time i see my doctor. Think that if i've drunk more than 45 units in the month before hand [so exceeding the 10 unit a week recommended limit] and / or i've drunk in the morning more than once a week then i'll mention it. Next seeing my doctor at the end of September so i'll see how things go until then.

no point · 29-08-2010, 02:07 PM

what about drinking decaf coffee? the reason i'm saying this is when i wanted to quit smoking, the only real substitute for me was coffee. a lot of coffee made me hyper and agitated so i started drinking decaf. *hugs*

weepingangel · 29-08-2010, 04:29 PM

Sorry yeah it is a good idea. i could try tea. That would work better for me. i much prefer tea to coffee. *hugs*

weepingangel · 02-09-2010, 01:05 PM

This is so stupid. Drank too much this morning i think. i mean it was hardly anything but it was too much for me and for first thing. Just feel very ill. And drunk. Stupid. i am incredibly stupid.

HarryMonk · 02-09-2010, 02:15 PM

Weepy darlin you aint stupid PLEASE stop beatin yourself up lady.

I'm about to preach what I dont practise; Instead of reaching for a beer or a slug, make some eggs-on-toast or peanut butter sandwich.

You have to stop drinking early doors unless you are fortunate enough to meet a very rich man who can handle minging moodswings.

Make a time limit 5pm then drink yourself to death. Your sleep pattern will normalise in time - drink fruit juice or squash in the day.

These steps helped me when I was ok, I'm 41 years old & on a downward spiral so dont make my mistakes. It is sh*t.

Please try to understand
Your friend
Harry Monk x

HarryMonk · 02-09-2010, 02:29 PM

i cant find the hug button so here is a *massive hug*

weepingangel · 02-09-2010, 09:48 PM

i do eat breakfast, i just do so after drinking. i wake up and then i drink and then i get out of bed and then i eat breakfast.

Don't understand what money has to do with dealing with my emotions, that seems totally irrelevant. And thanks for the encouragement to drink myself to death. Right now that seems like a very attractive option. i want to die. Drinking myself to death sounds like a nice suggestion, thanks.

Sorry, my mood's bad tonight.

HarryMonk · 03-09-2010, 09:49 PM

Hey look I didn't mean any offense. Never do but manage it anyway.

Weepy I too have wound up drinkin in the AM, polish off the contents of the fridge or in extreme cases trawl streets to find an early shop.

It isn't a good look & in my case has often distorted my take on the world as well as other peoples view of me.

Please believe, I meant no offense.

Harry Monk x

HarryMonk · 06-09-2010, 05:35 PM

Good luck.