A question about work (changing managers/staff) *is stressed*

[BatRachy]

Howdy Dudes and Dudettes of Vets (wayhey that rhymes!!)

I was just wondering if you could give me a little bit of advice please?

Basically our wonderful (stand-in) manager where I work (Leeds Waterstone's store) is leaving. It's bad enough in itself, but it's due to head office being a right pain in the arse. The lovely Sarah has been stand-in store manager for 2 years, without being paid the managers wage (considerably higher than assitant manager) and without any of the benefits. She has done a wonderful job, and is also the only person in the shop, apart from my boyfriend, who knows the real deal with me, and my mental status.
She's now leaving to pastures new, and although I've only been there since last September, I feel like the rug is being pulled out from under me. Also a few others are leaving due to university in September and the want of a better wage and no ******** customers.

What do I do regarding the new manager and my Efexor withdrawl/mental health (or lack thereof) etc?? He's meant to be ''nice''. But Sarah's own sister had major mental health problems, and killed herself when her daughter was a baby. Sarah has brought her neice up as her own. She helped her sister work with the NHS all through her illness. I'm guessing this new manager won't have this kind of empathy and experience?!?!? And anyway, it's a man. Not good.
Now, another assitant manager, and the manager of the floor i work on, knows I self harm (having scars all up my arm, wearing just one sleeve pushed up etc she guessed, and we've had long chats about stuff too), and knows my views on the NHS, and some other troubles, but nothing about other stuff that's going on. Now, her husband is diagnosed as Bi-Polar (yep we are a bunch of loonies in Leeds!) so she also can empathise and stuff, and help.

BUT. Any time off, or going home early has to be authorised by the manager, aka Mr. Scary-new-man. I would have to give a good reason. Also due to my withdrawl and other stuff I'm spending a few mins each day in tears, and all lunches and breaks asleep or in the pub. I'm sure he won't like this either... I'm not sure what to do!

Should I talk to my floor manager who knows some stuff and explain my fears? I just don't want to get into trouble as I love my job.

So sorry this is so long, but it's all a mess in my head

Thanks for any advice etc

love, Rachy xxxxx

(oh, and feel free to move to support if you think it's better there )

[Trucktastic]

Ooh, sounds like you are feeling abandoned by your previous manager. Which I'm not surprised, it sounds like she was a great help to you.

Personally I think the thing to do is to speak to your floor manager and tell her the problems you're feeling at the moment, and she can help, maybe tell the new guy some of the issues for you.
What you do in your lunch break is up to you, you don't get paid for it. As long as you don't go back to work drunk or cause trouble for the shop then it should not be a problem for the new manager.

The new manager is also going to be nervous a bit about meeting everyone, he's probably thinking something like: "what if they don't like me?", "what if I can't do the job?", "what if I'm not good enough?". He could even be thinking: "how am I going to hide my illness/es from the staff?"
My advice would be: speak to your floor manager, sounds like she's your immediate line manager anyway.
And give the new guy a little time to get used to the new situation, and see whether you think you can trust him enough to tell him a little of the problems. He won't have become a manager in a customer facing job without having some people skills!

You may find he's a great guy.
But you might find he's a complete asshole too. If he is then it's probably a good idea to leave him out of the loop.

Also there must be a personnel department in the company, is there anyone you can speak to there? Maybe not HR, because they are more concerned with where people are working, rather than what their problems are.

Summary of this rambling post!

Speak to your floor manager about your issues with the new person
Give the guy some time to settle in, to know you, and so you can get to know him
Then and only if you trust him, talk to him about some of your issues - you don't have to go into the complete details.

Good luck!

Lozx

[Queen Crabbit]

I don't have a clue, but how's it gone/how is it going?

And bump.

[BatRachy]

It's ok I guess. First day working with him was saturday just gone and he seemed pretty laid back, and a nice, friendly enough guy.
He's offered me a full time job instead of my part time hours I do at the moment which I really appreciated, and accepted.

Following recent self harming (recent being in the past few days) I am going to have to ask either him or my floor manager about wearing arm warmers when I go to work on thurs. Not sure whether I should even ask really; no uniform, just a dress code. So maybe I should leave it unless someone asks why I'm wearing them?!?

Anyhoo, yes, I'm still pretty worried about how this is all going to pan out, but the first step of meeting him and realising he's not a big-rachy-eating-monster is over, and I feel relieved for that.

Thanks guys xxxxx

[Stellata]

Congrats on the extra hours! :)

Can you not just wear long sleeves?

This is good - Mind guide to surviving working life [link]

You might like to print him off a copy. And maybe list for him a few things on how your illness and withdrawal does and doesn't effect you at work. I did that with each manager shift in the past year [I had a lot of transfers as I negotiated the varying adjustments at work for my own difficulties.]

[Mrs Sam]

if i was you id just wear the arm warmers and see what happens later. its been pretty cold recently so if you didnt give the actually reason im sure they wouldnt say anything.

*hugs*