I have Cereral Palsy and been struggling since I can remember, was bullied at school and suffered Depression. I have tried school counselling, uni counselling and CAMHS counselling - some 'personal counselling' CMHT said I wasn't 'bad enough for them.
My Dad and Grandma died a week a part in March this year. I'm very anxious... I did get through Uni and got a 2:1 Bsc(hons) Counselling and therapeutic studies and worked in various places (temp) Latest job - very unsupportive and I've packed it in (probs unwisely) with no notice as I just can't do it not with the pressure and no support.
GP is being very good (only one gp is any good with mental health probs there though so no idea what I'll do when he leaves eventually)
GP said it sounded like I had Generalized Anxiety and Meta Worry so changed my meds from Citalopram to Sertraline was on 50mg for a week increased to 100mg and just been back as struggling again (felt it was time to leave work as really not coping) been put on 2mg Diazapam () 3 x a day and increased Sertraline to 150mg. Just on Diazapam for a week to according to Doc 'take me down a notch' Not keen on taking Diazapam long term but related to my other thread 'scared to be forced of meds' if I get stable I would be happy to reduce Sertraline to 100mg I think but as I said in my other thread titled 'Scared to be forced of meds' - I have tried coming off completely before with fluoxetine and citalopram and I last a few weeks/months and seem to 'crash' again.
Can anyone offer support, has anyone had a similar experience?
I'm sorry to hear that things aren't going well at the moment. What with childhood memories, losing two close family members so close this year and dealing with current anxiety is a lot to cope with and hold on your shoulders! I am glad however that you're getting some support from your GP. Are you currently in touch with your mental health team? If not I think it might be a good idea to ask for your GP to refer you to the access team or similar.
I've been prescribed diazepam prn and it's usually given short term as benzos are physically addictive. I've been prescribed beta blockers for anxiety too (propanolol) which I found worked quite well but again that was short term. I am also on Sertraline 150mg which I find is a much better all round medication for me... but everyone is different. I can feel a difference if I miss two or more doses though so I think it is definitely doing some good. Coming off medication is always going to be difficult but when the time is right, with support from your GP and with strict reduction guidelines, I think it's possible.
*cuddles you*
Sophie.x
Soon... Now will be then...Today will be yesterday... Present will be past...And thought will be memory... So...Live for the future! Make your future how you want it!
I'm not an expert on the meds but I think Sophie is right. I have also been prescribed diazepam but only short term and when I was in hospital.
It sounds like there is a lot going on for you right now and I can see how work can be a very difficult thing.
I'm glad your doctor at the moment is supportive. Are you getting any support from family, friends or professionals? Someone to talk to or make sense of what is going on?
Take care of yourself. xxxx
The Mole was bewitched, entranced, fascinated. By the side of the river he trotted as one trots, when very small, by the side of a man who holds one spell-bound by exciting stories; and when tired at last, he sat on the bank, while the river still chattered on to him, a babbling procession of the best stories in the world, sent from the heart of the earth to be told at last to the insatiable sea.
Wind in the Willows.
Droplet and Sophie and PE (sorry don't know your name) Thank you so much for replying.
Droplet - I don't have friends which is a problem but when you are 22 and the only friends you have had in the past are the ones that use you because you are an easy target, where do you find friends? At my age - everyone has established a friendship circle.
I have a fab Other Half (OH) I met him on this site actually and we have been together 6 years in March. Heavens only knows how he puts up with me! The other day I asked him why he loved me and he said he couldn't tell me... I find this worrying but maybe it's hard to put into words.
My family will naturally die and I am frightened of being alone Miss Havisham - eske.
I see no future for me at the moment but I will struggle on as Suicide just isn't me - not an option in my view as it destroys those left behind.
I have Counselling, through a charity I volunteer for - they are a god send.
Just to add to what you were saying Sophie - medication is my crutch and I can't see a life without it. If it helps, why should I come off it? (Not attacking you but I just have a 'thing' about the Doctors and being 'funny' about meds)
I've tried Counselling... I've studying counselling. If medication helps me get stable and feel better what is wrong with taking it for the rest of my life?
what you said about everyone having a circle of friends.... i've said that so many times before. about middle school. and then about highschool. and it hasn't proven to be true. my general sense is that when you feel like you're on the outside, thats all that you see. you're 22. people are changing jobs and just finishing school. they're moving for a job, or to be with a significant other. there are lots of people your age that would really like a new friend. what activities do you enjoy, or would be willing to try? the best way to make friends is to go out and do things. and don't wait for the "perfect" opportunity either; if you wait for perfect, you'll never actually do anything. go for "good enough" and then in a while when you're looking back you might see how perfect it really was.
this is my magical medicine cabinet. Left to right they contain: courage, hope, calmness, and strength.
The magical part: They NEVER run out, so borrow some any time you want.
Oh I got the wrong end of the stick I thought that you wanted to come off your meds and not rely on them for the rest of your life. I'm with you on this though... if meds helps and they're designed to be taken long term than why fix something that's not broken.
Sophie.x
Soon... Now will be then...Today will be yesterday... Present will be past...And thought will be memory... So...Live for the future! Make your future how you want it!
I'm not in the best place to offer advice at the moment, but I wanted to let you know that I read your post and am thinking of you and wishing you well, hugs:)
"just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it turned into a beautiful butterfly..."
As long as meds are keeping me stable, I should stay on them I think. BF says 'when you feel ready, why not come off them and see?' My answer: Well yeah - been there, tried that, had counselling etc etc and if I need meds forever then so what?
Maybe I'm weak. Maybe I'm a wuss. Perhaps, they'll damage my body or something. Most SSRI's (apart from Fluoxetine) haven't been around long enough to know about long term effects.
ps: Sophie, I'm not sick of you. I think it's great that whatever place you are in at present you are still helping to support others.
OMG Still feeling similar to this except I'm now in a state over my ESA claim. I put on the form that I take Diazepam PRN... It's there just incase but not on repeat or anything..perhaps I should have left that out.
The CAB lady filled the form in for me and then I signed it...more panic.
I'm panicing I'll be seen as some Fraud. I am trying really really hard but it all just feels a bit too much. The Sertraline has kicked in a bit but I wouldn't describe the feeling as pleasant.
The ESA50 questions were hard. I'm scared about the ATOS assesment
i understand how stressful it can be to fill out those types of forms. i would get totally wrapped up in thoughts like that as well... even if by some chance they did question it, you could just explain that you made a mistake. it wouldn't possibly be the first time that someone has gotten confused on those sorts of forms...
this is my magical medicine cabinet. Left to right they contain: courage, hope, calmness, and strength.
The magical part: They NEVER run out, so borrow some any time you want.
I'm Clare. I've read your post and I'm sorry things are so hard for you at the moment. I understand the feeling that if meds work why change them?
I dont know what ESA is cause I'm in Australia but I assume its some kind of benefits? I always hate those forms cause like you I feel like they will judge me or think I'm a fraud! As for having no friends I thought the same thing because I was in hospital for years and when I came out I had no friends but through social groups I have made plenty and I feel very differently about making friends. I think if you put yourself out there (which isn't easy) you may just find some people who will like you for you and maybe make great friends. Are there any groups in your area either support or social? Cause that's what I found that once you settle into a group it becomes really easy to make friends. Anyway I'm rambling but I'm sure you are a beautiful person who people would love to be friends with <3
) 3 x a day and increased Sertraline to 150mg. Just on Diazapam for a week to according to Doc 'take me down a notch' Not keen on taking Diazapam long term but related to my other thread 'scared to be forced of meds' if I get stable I would be happy to reduce Sertraline to 100mg I think but as I said in my other thread titled 'Scared to be forced of meds' - I have tried coming off completely before with fluoxetine and citalopram and I last a few weeks/months and seem to 'crash' again.
