Don't know

[snixxy]

Things are getting really bad.
The stress of coping with life are getting too much. After being sheltered in hospital for 3 and a half years its hard re-adjusting to life and things are particularly bad at the moment with a couple of family members being ill. I cannot, therefore, go to my normal family members for support as they are caring for my ill family members.
Feel incredibly lonely and VERY close to reverting back to my old, destructive ways of coping.
My CPN doesn't seem to understand when I explain to her that I am struggling, she just brushes it off or changes the subject.
Increased stress = increased visual and auditory hallucinations. Trying to stay calm but its just a vicious circle.
Seeing my Psychiatrist at the beginning of April. Hoping he can help. If he has no answers I don't know what else to do.

[Pi.R^2]

Is there a care plan or discharge plan for you since leaving hospital?

Could you try again to convince your CPN to take your issues seriously, and if that doesn't work, maybe you could request to see a different member of your care team?

[K8EB]

I wish that support was better after leaving hospital. Is there a specific support group in your town or city?
How did you cope with stress in hospital? Have you got any activities that you could spend time on?
In the UK the Samaritans are terrific and often have a centre that you can drop into for face to face support. They're not just for the suicidal and really are good - at least the ones that I've met are!
Stay in touch and keep posting.

BTW I love Tori Amos too. I also like Bat for Lashes and Kate Bush.

[crazykat]

I'm sorry to hear that your CPN isn't being helpful, maybe try and write down specifically what you are struggling with and give that to her. If she still doesn't listen is there someone else you could see? As I really think you need the extra support at the moment. What kind of coping strategies did you use in the hospital that helped? As it would probably be useful to try and see if you can implement some of them at home.

In terms of the hallucinations some people find listening to music can be helpful to block it out especially if they are auditory hallucinations. Other than that it might also be helpful to try and look at ways of reducing your stress such as using relaxation techniques, going for a walk/run. Hopefully your psychiatrist will be helpful. Take care
Kat xxx

[Patent Pending]

Sorry you're struggling so much right now *hugs*

As suggested above; it might help to write down what specifically you're struggling with so you and your CPN can come up with a plan of how to help you? Often when I tell my CPN that I'm struggling she askes me to list the areas in life I'm struggling with and we're work through them.

Did you have a plan for when you're discharged? In case you started struggling and wanting to harm yourself again?

Try to stay strong.

x x x

[snixxy]

Thank you for your replies. I tried to ring the crisis line three times last night but couldn't get through so took myself to bed and cried myself to sleep.

Today I needed to get out of the house so went into town. Just wandered round the park, fed the ducks, then went into the city and listened to buskers. Sat in a coffee shop and read a newspaper. Bought myself so nice posh food from marks and spencer!

You're all right, I need to make my CPN realise how much I am struggling. I will write down how I am feeling and what areas I am struggling with and give it to her when I see her on Wednesday. If that doesn't work I will ask to see someone different.
I'm sure she said there was a care plan written for me when I was discharged but I have never seen it, so I will ask for a copy of it when I see her next week too.
I attend a Hearing voices group every week, just started going and they are very supportive so I am learning new coping techniques from them.

I just hate evenings/night time. My mood starts to drop from about 5 o'clock onwards. Think I need to talk it through with my psychiatrist when I see him.

[PinQ]

Maybe you could see if the appointment with your psych could be brought forward? You seem to be handling the days well, have you got a friend or relative that you could stay with/have stay over night? Or perhaps make plans for the evening like dinner or the cinema? Sometimes that helps me especially seen as I tend to be tired by the time I come home. I hope you feel better soon.

[snixxy]

I've only just moved to the area so I haven't made any friends yet. My Mum is coming on Saturday but, again that will only be during the day. And I can't worry her as she has my Dad and Nan to worry about.

I don't think they will be able to fit me in any sooner to see my psychiatrist, it's only another 2 and a half weeks that I have to hang on. I really hope he can help. Don't know what i'll do if he doesn't do anything.

Like you say, days are good, I keep busy but nights are awful, going to watch some tv and have a shower and have some dinner.... just trying to keep busy.

[PinQ]

Yeah you could write yourself a list of things to get done in the evening to keep you busy. You could download a movie to watch every night. Just keeping yourself busy can be helpful but remember helplines like the Samaritans and sane are there all night. If you can't get hold of the crisis team they could be a big help.

[crazykat]

You did well to go out and distract yourself, I know how hard it can be when your not feeling the greatest so you should be proud of yourself. I hope it goes well when you see your CPN. You have identified that you find nights hard, maybe it would help if you planned some things ahead of time for you to do in the evening so you stay distracted. Keep fighting, you will get through this. Take care
Kat xxx

[snixxy]

Trying really hard to motivate myself today. I got up at half 8 as normal to let puppy out and take meds, then went back to bed and didn't get up till 2pm. My mum is coming tomorrow so I desperately need to tidy the house otherwise she will have a go at me. Just doing a little bit then sitting and watching a bit of tv. Still need to write stuff down for CPN but will do that this evening. Sounds weird but my puppy is keeping me going too, I look at him and I love him so much.

Done my washing, Need to...Hoover, wash pots, tidy upstairs, take out rubbish, clean kitchen and bathroom. (blergh!)

[snixxy]

Managed to drag myself in the shower this evening (Didn't make it last night). Feel a lot fresher.
Housework...hmmm not so good Will need to get up early in the morning and do it before mum comes.
Holding it together this evening. Trying to write stuff out for my CPN. It just doesn't sound right on paper. It sounds right in my head but when its on paper it just doesn't seem the same.

[crazykat]

You did well to have a shower and even do a little bit of tidying. I understand how hard it can be when your feeling low. Keep trying, maybe writing a list and having rewards between each task would help.