Work/Sick Notes = Me Freaking Out (UK)

[albie]

I've been signed off work again for "excessive stress" code word for doctor being concerned about my SH and current state. I had one week off say three weeks ago, returned to work for a few days but now I'm currently in the middle of another week being signed off.

Doctor then wants me to ideally do a phased return to work of either short days/short weeks for just two weeks. I had a meeting with HR on Thursday where I was more open about my depression then I intended or wanted to be which left me in tears. Although the man was sensitive to a point he also had no understanding about MH and some of his questions of "will it not all blow over" angered me.

They don't seem to think that a phased return to work will do me any good as it's only been a week off work, since it's only a doctors recommendation (I have a sick note for a week off from the doctor and then another one stating altered duties, amended hours and something else but I don't think they have to listen to it?). So I came out of the meeting "to sort things out" in tears and completely confused as to whether I'm having phased return or not.

I've now got to speak to work again tomorrow, something I really don't want to do and then go in for another meeting on Wednesday.

I'm now not sure whether it would be a good idea to email my manager explaining what's happened in the past month or so and possibly about my OD'ing past (as I've been having suicidal thoughts recently) to emphasis that it's not just me being a bit sensitive and explain why my doctors come to this decision. I'm really not in a good place at the moment. He did say if they weren't playing ball he'd sign me off for another two weeks rather than phased return but then I look like I'm just being awkward with work. I think my parents see it as me wanting sometime off work as I'm acting "fine" but my SH is occurring daily now, worse than it's ever been so if I get those two weeks I'm likely to get grief from work and home. Ironically I've claimed to be "fine" for several years now but been struggling and they had no idea. Unless I break down and cry in front of them they don't seem to think that there's a problem.

I didn't put it down on my pre-existing conditions when I joined work a year ago (despite having on going MH issues for five/six years now) because although on medication I wasn't suffering and no-ones ever given me an actual diagnosis. So I'm also trying to not give too much information away because I don't want that to bite me on the bum either.

I just don't know what to do now as I feel that no matter what I do it's not going to be right for anyone.

I think I just need some outsider advice from someone who understands/has been there.

[NoAngel]

I understand the fuss, I've been signed off work sick for a year and a half now. You do NOT need to tell your work any of these details. Occupational health cannot over rule your gp's advice (as much as they like to pretend to). Go ahead and get your phased return if this is what you are after. Just explain to the man if you see him again that you think this would be beneficial, don't let them bully you. Are you getting any other help at the moment?

[Heaven Knows]

I can understand where you're coming from - I've been signed off work for nearly seven months now. Unfortunately, in my case, I have found that Occupational Health can override the decision of your GP - my GP has been saying since my first week off that I should be at work but due to liability my work have taken advice from OH rather than my GP. I was advised by my HR that the doctor from OH overrides a GP but not a specialist [a psychiatrist etc].

My best advice would be to seek advice from a company called ACAS - if you search for them on google they've got a pretty in depth website. They have really helped me with my fight to return to work and were really nice to talk to. Also, there is a leaflet on the Governments website; www.dwp.gov.uk/fitnote which says all about the doctors fit note and what employers should be doing about it. It might be of some use.

I hope things get sorted for you without too much stress.

x Katie x

[PassedExpectations]

i don't have advice, but am hoping that things work out. you can get through this, as difficult as it is right now.