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-   -   An Urgent Plea to Help my Friend Chelsea!!!! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=76181)

Margo 08-12-2008 03:44 PM

An Urgent Plea to Help my Friend Chelsea!!!!
 
Chelsea (Queen Crabbit) is my friend. Shes close. As she would say shes like family. She's been so kind to me. Shes one of the loveliest people you could meet.

Shes also ill. Recent Diagnoses of Bi-Polar and PTSD. She spends half the week in pain from her car crash, 3-4 migraines so she cant sleep and the other half having nightmares of being raped so again she cant sleep. She has no energy. She is trying to get a job and live a life but shes struggling and its killing her.

She has asked her parents for help. It seems they are just shouting at her aqnd telling her that people get ups and downs all the time. They dont believe this illness. I dont think she has the skills to tell them. Shes too scared of her dad.

Im too ill to help. I have no more words for her. My anxiety prevents me driving down and telling them straight.


So im asking/begging can someone please help her? Can someone offer advice on any service that can speak to her parents and tell them the facts about this illness. Can soemone help in some way to make them see she is seriously ill and not just lazy.

Im scared she is going to get worse. She NEVER tells anyone exactly how bad it is.

I cant handle the burden right now. Im barely surviving myself.

I know im selfish. But please please please cna someone help her.

Thank you.

matthew

CaiteeBug 08-12-2008 08:39 PM

The best I can do is offer unlimited amounts of snuggles and an ear to listen.

~*forever_broken*~ 08-12-2008 08:53 PM

I can't help :-( I wish I could. I hate that Chels is feeling so bad. I hate that her parents are so awful...

Matthew, we love you.

Chels, we love you sweetie, we care... and we ave cuddles and such *massive hugs*. Sorry I am not of more use

Ragdoll 08-12-2008 09:32 PM

I wish I could do more, but all I can suggest is talking to Mind, because I know they do an advocate service and maybe they could talk to her parents...

Stay safe Chels xx

Rain Keeper 08-12-2008 09:59 PM

am at work but will try to advise when i get home in the wee hours...


I love you matthew and chelsea!

1ofmany 08-12-2008 11:35 PM

I would love to go and talk to them and explain stuff...unfortunatly i dont know the ins and outs of the problem and have no idea where i would be going.

ravynsoul 09-12-2008 01:01 AM

*Hugs to Matt and Chels* I will see if I can find out any resources on the web that you can provide to your parents....
Until then, I offer my ear to listen and as many hugs as you both want.

ravynsoul 09-12-2008 04:11 AM

I found some websites which offer support or information for families of those with bi-polar disease and have listed them below with a quick description - perhaps you can print some off Chels to give to your parents to help with their understanding.... [Note: I am still trying to remember all the rules, etc, so if I am doing something wrong by posting these, please let me know]:

1.) From Centre for Addiction and Mental Health- This has an info guide, tips, fact sheets, and resources for clients, families, and friends
http://www.camh.net/About_Addiction_..._families.html

2.) This is a pdf document entitled "Treatment of Bipolar Disorder: A guide for patients and families" it looks to be from a reputable source as well.
http://www.psychguides.com/Bipolar_2000_Guide.pdf

3.) From the website "Here to Help" there is a page on Bipolar Disorder and effects on family... it also has a link to the "family toolkit" which states "When a family member suffers from a mental illness, one of the most important things to do is to take the time to learn about the disorder. By educating yourself as much as you can about the mental or substance use disorder, you can take an active role in your family member’s recovery. The Family Toolkit was designed to assist families in caring for a family member with a mental illness by providing information and practical resources."

http://www.heretohelp.bc.ca/publicat...bipolar/family
http://www.heretohelp.bc.ca/skills/s...family-toolkit

4.) From the website: HealthyPlace.com a Bipolar Community part of an article on Learning to Cope with Bipolar Disorder contains the section "What can families and friends do to help?"

http://www.healthyplace.com/COMMUNIT...e/coping_2.asp



Please let me know if this helps you at all, or if you want me to look for more resources... I am going to look up some on ptsd; however if you want me to stop let me know too... I don't want to be a pain, I just want to help and this is one of the ways I know how..

Take care!! (*Hugs if you want them!!*)

ravynsoul 09-12-2008 04:35 AM

I found some sites on PTSD and have listed them below... Please note that these all could potentially be triggering as they talk about trauma and some have examples of types of trauma... again I think they are all from reputable sites... and will give explanations below.

1.) This is from the Website US Dept. of Veteran Affairs - National Centre for PTSD factsheet entitled PTSD and the Family

http://www.ncptsd.va.gov/ncmain/ncdo...fs_family.html

2.) (not as sure as the reputableness of this one, but think it is reputable) from the VA National Center for PTSD; entitled PTSD and the Family - a National Center Fact Sheet

http://www.forests.com/ptsdfam.html

3.) From Help Guide.org **Note this has at least one example; so may be triggering** Article called Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Symptoms, treatments, and self-help -- has a part on PTSD and the family as well as various links.
http://helpguide.org/mental/post_tra...reatment. htm

4.) From WebMD.com an article called PTSD and Your Family - an Overview

http://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/t...amily-overview


I hope this is helpful!!

Take care!

Heidi Tiger 09-12-2008 04:53 PM

*hugs for both Matt and Chelsea*

Matt, I know you feel like you can't help her right now, but I'm sure even knowing you care as much as you do helps in some way.

Chelsea, I'm sorry things are so tough, and wish there was some magic bullet to solve your problems. With regards to your family, I don't know what you can do to get through to them that it is a real illness. Would showing them the steven fry documentary help at all? Like as in Steven Fry is a positive role model who has bipolar, so you can have it and not be lazy, just be ill. Keep fighting, you will get through this, you're a strong person and have coped with so mch already, I believe in you.
xxx

Coffee Addict 09-12-2008 07:25 PM

Like I have always thought was right....
Write a letter, print off information.
Leave it where they will find it and then leave.
Give them time to read it and react without you being there.
It is just about the only way,if they don't get it from that seems like they are in denial and will never get it.

That is when you willjust about have to disown the thought of them helping and turn to friends or other family members.
Good luck,my thoughts are with you

Mrs Sam 09-12-2008 07:25 PM

chelsea i'm sorry things are so so terrible right now. please dont try and do this on your own, lean on us/me/friends/family/councillory type people. i know it must be hard accepting this illness and the new meds and everything but think of this as the beginning of recovery, not the end of normalness (if that makes sense).

i think you are an amazing woman and you deserve so much good stuff.

my PM box is always open and i'm only a text away too (did you get my text a little while ago?)

*hugs and snuggles*

xxxx

Bitter_Angel 09-12-2008 07:55 PM

Have you thought about taking one of your parents to your next psych app?
I know that I take my mum and it really helps her to try and understand.
Other than that, just what everyone else has suggested, with printing off info, or perhaps finding a film about it and watching it together.

Amaryllis 09-12-2008 08:00 PM

I wish I knew the words to help you, Chelsea. I think you're pretty cool.

phoenixflames_forever 10-12-2008 01:49 AM

Wish i could help but am pretty useless at this stuff *sends lots of hugs*, thinking of you Chelsea xx

P.S note to Matthew you are not selfish, by the sounds of it your a good friend :P xx

Yellow 10-12-2008 06:06 AM

i have no words right now.
i just want to send my love to you both.
you are both so very important to me though you probably dont know it.
i love you guys.
xxxxxxx

sherlock holmes 10-12-2008 07:26 PM

Oh yeah, that Stephen Fry documentary was rather enlightening and well made.

Louise 10-12-2008 08:28 PM

Sends hugs to matt and chelsea thinking about you both.
i am only a pm away if any of the two of you want to talk.

Trucktastic 16-12-2008 08:56 PM

I can't add anything that hasn't already been said above.

Printing off and leaving them around might help, it's a good idea.

Take care

Loz xx

Kija 17-12-2008 12:09 AM

are there any bipolar drop in groups for those affected by bipolar including friends and family near her? i'm trying to find one in my area to send my boyfriend to! i went to one before i moved and it was helpfull for me, finding new information and understanding, so would think it would be usefull for her parents?
i wish i had the courage to talk to them, because people who think this illness is nothing really annoy and upset me, because **** it its real.
hugs to both of you. sorry i cant be of more help.


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