My mental health
 

The last few days have been very hard.
I was feeling strong, able to ignore Beth and get on with things. But recently I've just been finding it so hard to deal with her. I can't ignore her any more, last night I couldn't sleep until the sun came up at 7am because she kept telling me the devil was going to rape me.
It's just not fair. I'm so tired of her. And it's been especially hard because everyone thinks I'm doing so well, I don't want to disappoint anyone by telling them how difficult things have become.
I feel sick.
It's been a month and a few days, but I don't think I can get through today. I really don't.

What're you frightened of?

I'm sorry to hear that things have become hard for you, has something happened that might have led to this deterioration? I'm sure you wouldn't be disappointing anyone if you let them know how things are for you, they won't want you to be going through this on your own. What is it about today that makes you feel like you can't get through? Please take care. I'm here if you need anything.

I was scared of self harming.
I slipped up, quite badly. I self harmed a lot and it's still bleeding.
I called my CPN who came over and was nice to me. He said I have a lot on my plate at the moment and it's probably the stress of everything making me feel weaker against Beth.

Saying a prayer for you Zowie.

Thank you Susan x

*lots of squishes*

I've messed up bad. They're all up my arms, like all the way up to my shoulders, all up my legs from my ankles to the top of my thighs, and all over my stomach. There's blood everywhere, maybe I should go to A&E x

*hugs* hunni it sounds quite bad...maybe a&e would be a good idea...
*hugs* thinking of you xx

please call someone to take you to hosp sounds like u need help hun let us kno how ur lots love xx

Go to A&E honey. you're under a fair bit of stress and when things get like hat it's very easy to slip back inot bad habits. *cuddles*

Didn't go to A&E, took my meds and went to bed. Slept badly, woke up about ten times because she was shouting at me.
Came to college today and couldn't hear my teacher over Beth and then I heard a male's voice talking to Beth about me.
Am I going even crazier? x