stabbed in the back
 

iv recently had 2 months of school, not only am i behind with coursework in just about every subject but iv also lost touch with my friends. i dnt feel like i can talk to them anymore and feel really alone. they are really funny with me about my scars and stuff, and i recently over heard one of my friends tellin sum1 how much of a freak she thought i was. it has really affected me and i am becoming very paranoid in school and dnt trust any of the people i thought were my friends.she was my best friend and i dnt no why she is being so horrible to me, before i had the time off school we were fine.

has this happened to any1 else?
what should i do?

kate xx

A simillar thing happened to me when I was at school actualy. I was ill for a few months and when I went back my friends had all sort of rearanged themselves and I was kind of pushed out of the group. They had spent those few months talking about things and doing things which I hadnt been a part of, so when there conversations were about things I hadnt done, I couldnt join in.
After a few months, everything was so obviously different that I decided to make a whole new group of friends. I know that might be hard for you, it was soooo hard for me, and it might not be the right decsion but for me it was. You could always try talking to them about how u feel?
Hope I helped a little xxx

Oh god yes. This rings some noisy bells.
My "supportive" friends decided that I was dragging them down and that I was a freak who made up lies and cut for attention. That I was making them depressed with my selfish problems. And that they wanted nothing to do with me. This was all a few months before we started exams. No pressure there, dealing with things on my own cause my friends had disowned me, trying to finish coursework and stuff all the while freaking out about a new issue in my life as well as all the same ones from before. It was ****ing hard. Two of these girls were my best friends, one I had known all my life. It hurt me so much. But I got through it.
They wouldn't talk to me - so I wrote them letters every now and then. Telling them they hurt me and they were making things ten times harder for me, and we had exams coming up and can we just be friends again.
Now I look back and think, Gemma, you didn't need them to be happy, they weren't helping in the first place and then they made it worse. They weren't real friends. I shouldn't have crawled on my hands and knees to get them back.
I don't talk to any of them now.
Not worth the time of day.

And these people who have done this to you. Not worth it either. I could make excuses for them, they don't inderstand it, they aare scared and worried and don't know how to deal with it. But honestly, they could jsut talk to you about that stuff, not treat you like something on the end of their shoe. Sure hun, talk to them if you want to. I could be (and quite often am) wrong. Maybe they are worth it. But think how this is making you feel sweetie. You are worth more than this. Whatever was causing you to SI, whatever underlying issues you have, you don't need these people making it worse for you.
Move on. That is my honest opinion, easier said than done yes. But there are more people out there, people who will appreiciate you, and care for you, who have things in common with you and that you will be friends with for a very long time to come, maybe even forever.



Honestly? People who you are friends with at school - you probably will never see once you have left. Everyone says it. And everyone tries to deny it it. I did. I was going to be friends with my school mates forever. But I have to admitt it now. It didn't happen. I see the odd one out drinking on a friday night but that is it.
Tust me chuck, move on, leave them behind you. They aren't being fair on you and you need to concentrate on getting through school.

good luck, take care, and if you want to talk I will be around.
Gemma xxx

She doesn't sound like the friend you thought she was. But perhaps she was just saying those hurtful things thinking you wouldn't find out so she could maintain her status. Cause honestly, there are people who do think scars and all that are weird and she probably doesn't want to appear weird. But you are not. Perhaps you can sit down and explain that to her. You are going through tough times and your scars are not funny, let her know how her comments made you feel.
Message me if you ever want to talk.

thanks for posting your replies
its really helpful to get other peoples views on the situation, my judgement always seems really cloudy at the mo.
hopefully i wont freak out anymore and wont get totally histerical about everything!

x kate x

Don't be sorry if you freak out about that again. Friends are one of the most important thing in our lives.
I can only advise you to ignore your so called friends and to try and find new ones. I know it seems hard, but I know that in every school, there are also kids you would never have thought to speak with who are actually much nicer and understanding.
Give them a chance, you might not regret.

most of my mates ditched me when i started skivin lessons becuase i couldn't hac it anymore. it was becoming too hard for me to cope in lessons.
they didn't understand what i was goin through and they still don't. it is a pain and i hate it.