gonna need some help....sorry.*update*
 

thank you all for supporting me through the whole surgery ordeal.


and NOW the reason for this post.....

i'll be seeing keith on friday night and all day saturday. he is leaving early sunday. im a bit upset that i'll only be seeing him for a day and a night. but its better than nothing. theyre coming early this year because they are spending Christmas in the bahamas.

the problem im having is that Kelly has 2 children, a 3 year old and a 12 year old. tonight we are putting up the Christmas tree. its so freaking painful. i see flashes of Christmas's past, when Keith and i used to do all this. its breaking me and i dont know what to do.

someone help...please?
xxxxxxx

oh hun *hugs you* I understand how painful that must be for you doing that without Keith even if it is with other people you care about. I have no advice, I just wanted to say I hope you enjoy your time with him and I am sorry things are so rough at the moment xxx

No advice.

Offering you a bear hug.

I'm sorry that you have to spend Christmas away from Keith. Just try to enjoy the time that you two do have together, and let those good feelings carry you through the rest of the Christmas season. Can you call him while he is in the Bahamas? I'm sure you would both enjoy that. Best wishes, and *hugs*

Hey rachel honey, I can imagine how you feel and how hard this must be for you.
Think about the time you will have with Keith, and let that help you through the difficult times, I really wish I could offer some useful advice, Im really sorry that I cant be more help, but know that Im here if you ever want to chat.
Take care, Love Lora xxxx

hey hunny, you're doing it for Keith, to make it special for him, maybe save a few decorations for him to add to the tree, or make some new ones together out of cardboard, glitter and wool or string. mand x

Thinking of you and the family at this difficult time hun.
Always here to chat.
All my love and big huggles.
Mary
xxxx

I dont know what to do except relish every second he is with you and take as many photos and have as many hugs as you possibly can.

Love
Matthew xxx

I'm sorry I cant say more to you. But I have read and I care, and Keith will just be so happy to see you. xxxxxxx much love

Bit useless with advice right now but wanted to offer big hugs and a mug of eggnog/hot chocolate.

*squeeze*

*sends comforting huggles*

Thinking of you hun, hows things?

Much love
Mary
xxx

thank you all guys.

im home now. i had a great time with Keith and my whole family.
i just got back home.
Keith is on his way home and is leaving for the Bahamas on thursday.
it was a wonderful time and a pleasant goodbye.
thank you for all the support.

now i just have to get through Christmas. im feeling ok about it.

love to all.
xxxxxxxxx

Hey hun, Im glad you had a good time, just think of all the good memories Keith is taking with him!

Take care of yourself, Christmas is gonna be hard but remember its only a couple of days then things will get back to normal. You and Keith have had your Christmas together, now its just a case of watching soem good films and waiting for the January sales to begin!

Much love
Mary
xxxx

thank you Mary.

today is hard. last night was especially hard.
i dont know how to do this.
i miss him so freaking much.
i need him with me so bad.
ive cried until i cant cry anymore.
i really want to harm but i know its only a temporary release.
i dont know why im posting again.
i just really dont know what to do with myself.
im really sorry.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx

i so wish i knew what to say and what to do to make this easier for you buttercup. you know i love you soo soo much and you have all my love. i'm so sorry that having my kids here makes it harder for you. what can i do? you know sweet Kaleb loves you soo soo much and Chenoa too. you are a great big part of our family TOO and without you, i/we fall to pieces. just wish Keith could be here with us too. i'll do whatever i can to help you. you KNOW that! just hang in there for all of us. please. for sweet Keith, me (your baby girl), Kaleb, Noa... your family who DOES love you dearly. it will all get better. it will. the better days will come again. and just think of how much fun Keith is gonna be having down there snorkeling in the Bahamas and all the other fun things he'll be doing. He's in good hands with Robert. you know that. and he's got all the fun memories to carry with him that you and him made this year. :-) you keep them with you and hold em tight. but now we need you too. ok? :thumbup: let's make some good memories of our own. i love you soo soo much!!!!!!!! and i'll never ever stop!!!!!!!

((((BIG BIG HUGS!!!))))

loving you always ... SO MUCH,
your baby girl :kiss:

You don't have to be sorry for posting honey *extra hugs* I hope you feel better soon. I'm sorry I don't have anything better to offer but I will try and dispense hugs on a regular basis if it helps xx