Imploding*now triggerng*
 

Time to shut you all out again.
Matthew going downhill fast.
I cant talk to you.
Im just gonna post and thats all.
For some reason i cant make this on V2.

One minute im ok and the next im crying and i havent been able to pick up since.

Im sorry

Matthew, I think you're wonderful and I wish I knew you better.
Please look after yourself, you can get through the rubbish times,
you're a super strong cookie, even if you dont believe it.
Love love xx

Oh sweetheart, I'm so sorry.
Try and get some sleep. I know you aint been getting much recently and that won't help.
It's Thursday tomorrow - get your meds and see your psych.
I know it's hard to talk, and I know it's scary that maybe someone might actually make you feel better. But I'm here. Always have been and always will be.
If posting is the only way that you can communicate your feelings then do it. Please.
Now, remember what a nag I am, and what conversation we had this weekend, and what an annoying little pest I'll always be because I just want you to be okay.
Love you. xxx

Why is it time for you to shut us all out when you need us the most?

Why can't you talk to us?

Its ok to feel sad.. really it is...

I can post advice. I can post silly. I can post anything as long as its not bout me.
I cant even say thank you.
I cant speak. sorry

p hearts b.

Sweetheart, you know where I am.
Please try and get a relatively early night.
Good luck for tomorrow. I'm sure I'll be txting you at 11:30.

BTW I have docs appt at 10 on Friday bout my shoulder. Thanks for making me feel actually quite squeamish about being such a stubborn pony!

Who says you can't post about you?

I just punched myself in the face so hard. Dunno how im gonna explain this in the morning. Have a terrible thirst for pain now.
Hit again. Shiit!
Twitchy and angry.
Keep them away.
Ccant speak.
cant speak
wanna break

*hugs*
Hun please try an talk.
Im not much use tonight.
but please talk to someone
anyone
dont shut yourself away.
take care hun

I know i posted this one last time. But it is a pic of you so i thought i hould repost t in here. *hugs* hope your ok hunni.

Oh sweetheart.

I'm so sorry.

xxx

Heh today therapy. Today hardest therapy of my life. Today i broke down and then shut down in therapy. Today i never said a word to anyone. Today the few words i uttered were more than i wanted to say.

Today i tensed so hard in therapy that i got cramp in both of my legs and my hands hurt from tension. Today i told her i never wanted to come back. Today i didnt understand. Today was too much.

Today there is no room for love. I have no heart left. today im so very tired.

:rose: :rose: :rose: :rose: :rose: :rose: :rose: :rose: :rose:

*hugs*

I don't know what I can do, and I don't know if you'd let me do it even if I did. But I can tell you that I care so very much.

Please try and stay safe. If that's all you do then please do that.

I think the world of you.

Oink. xxx

Today was hard for you hun. *hugs*
But you got through it. Just like you got through all those other hard times. Just like you will get through today. Where all here for you. I know it is hard to accept help or even ask for it. But it only takes on word. From heir things become easier.

I know its not easy for you, but at least try to speak to one person. Even if it is only about rubbish or boobies. Because you know as well as i do that once a on conversation is started, things can change. Moods can alter. People can save you from stupid things, all because they distracted you or made you think or slightly altered your mood.

Try not to shut down hunni.
*hugs tightly*
Want me to massage your cramped legs hun? ;-)

You know where i am. Take care.

*Sends lots of love*

Matthew James.

I aint going anywhere.

xxxxxxxx

Your heart is still there. Its just hiding right now because its hurting so much.

sorry things are so crap right now.

you dont have to talk if you dont want to but it might help.

please dont hurt yourself though,

xxxx