Mum I'm effin' twenty! I can do what I want!

[De Stijl]

Yeah my mum doesn't get that picture right now.

Last year I had a spit with my ex as we were both living away from home which ended up in the messiest break up I've had and I came down with depression pretty badly. But my mum will go off at me for getting like a piercing (which I dearly love!), or a new hair colour...what the hell do I do?

[shadow-light]

parents are that way I'm afraid... I'm 22 next week and live 400miles away from my parents but they still find ways to control my life of complain about my decisions...
the trick is to listen to them, not argue, and once they're done calmly explain your side or opinion... to appear to be taking what they say on board (and sometime really to do so)... it's like a compromise... and the calmer you stay and more thought out your arguments are the more they will think of you as an adult

[Dreaming.]

It's difficult - but no matter how old you are, you're always going to be her daughter, whom she still loves and cares about.

Maybe you could just sit down with her and calmly say that you feel she's being a little overbearing, maybe she could ease up a bit? And that you are 20, and legally an adult.

As Hazel said, it's very important to speak calmly, sensitively and sensibly with them - it just emphasises that you are an adult, and you are mature enough to deal with things - but maybe make sure you still ask for her help from time to time? That really helped my mum, because it still made her feel like she was involved, and that I needed her help sometimes - which, to be honest, I do!

But yes, act maturely and you're much more likely to get a positive reaction.

Take care
xx

[Bitter_Angel]

Its difficult as you will alsways be her "baby". Maybe try talking to her before getting things, perhaps asking her what she thinks of a certain shade of hair colour or a type of piercing. maybe if she feels more involved then she might adjust easier.

[ksdfjhlksajf]

I don't have any advice, but that happens to me too when I go home!

Like, I go home and it's back to curfews and stuff.