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Old 03-04-2021, 05:45 AM   #1
Join Date: Apr 2021
I hit a lady car..

Can I get some advice with no judgment please? About 3 weeks I accidentally backed into a lady car. She wasn't there so I left my info with the business owner. Due to it being on private property the police wasn't called. Well the lady who is 75 called me like a week after it happened saying it was going to cost $900 to fix. She showed me the estimate but since I am paying out of pocket she said I could find somewhere else..last week I ended up in the hospital and she threatened to sue me if I didn't answer the forward to today i found a local legit body shop and explained the situation. He understood that since I'm on disability he would work with me and respects I am trying to do what is right. He said if I go get the paint he will charge me $50 to fix it. Well now she is being extremely difficult. Subaru needs her Vin to find her paint code(I told her she can call with it if she is not comfortable giving it to me). She said until she physically sees the shop she is not giving me anything but just some days ago she was accusing me of dodging her and threatened to sue. she literally said she is no fool to just believe I found someone legit to do it cheaply. I gave her the man business information earlier and she never even called him. She wants to meet me and him personally. I don't care to meet the lady. I just want to take the man the paint and money and move on with my life. It also was a problem that I was going to pay him directly.

I tried to do right thing and now Im getting stressed. My health is in a critical state and I'm honestly just trying to put all this behind me. I'm just not even sure what to do from this point on. I accept my fault in this and have from day 1. My mom told me to save all the messages so if she decides to sue I can at least prove that I tried. I'm exhausted of the situation and again I just want it over.

Even if she sued I have nothing to my name..with being on social security and section 8 I cannot have too many assets. Anyways...i just need some sound advice on what to do next. And please no judgment I'm already stressed enough. 😫

Here is the scratches
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Old 03-04-2021, 09:25 AM   #2
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Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: London-ish
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Car troubles are always extra stressful especially when you're already going through stuff... and, annoyingly, people also get extra stressed out when someone damages their car so just makes the whole thing worse than it needs to be. I'm sorry she's not making it any easier for you.

I'd say $900 to fix that is way too much. The scratches don't look that bad. Maybe what you could do is get multiple quotes from people, get an average cost and give her the money directly then she can organise getting it fixed herself?

If you already have the licence plate number you should be able to use that to find out the paint code without needing the VIN.

Is there anyone you could pass this to (friends/family) who could deal with her for you?

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Old 03-04-2021, 01:21 PM   #3
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Godric's Hollow

I actually don't see 900$ as unreasonable, especially if they're quoting for a new bumper and paint, and assuming they're not going to be able to buff it out and paint it.

Is there any reason you can't just go through your insurance instead? You don't need a police report to do so.

If not, what about telling her to fix it herself, and then offering to make payments that you can afford? If you go this route I'd put a contract of sorts in writing and see if you can even get it notorized, that way if she tries to sue you have the contract to prove you are doing the right thing.

Please do not give me virtual hugs unless you are only using the hug function on threads. Thanks.

You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.

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Old 07-04-2021, 10:07 PM   #4
Join Date: Mar 2021

Has she filed anything with her insurance? I actually work in insurance claims intake, I don't handle claims myself but I get calls and initiate claims. I would say you should document everything, if you can communicate with her via email so there's a written record that would be good, also a record of the estimate from that guy. If it's not being handled through insurance I'm not sure how it'll go...

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