Back here again.
I truly hate myself right now.
After pushing through all the **** since I was 14, now 29, I find myself stupidly and foolishly back where I started.
Spent time avoiding him, knew I'd fall hard. But he wouldn't give up. Despite me being UK and him USA. We spent too many months talking daily. I trust him more than people who can stand next to me.
But now, he has disappeared. I'm stuck between worry and hurt.
Problem is, I never realised how much I started to rely on him. And now I find myself depressed, alone, and in pain. I hate that I feel so empty now. Feel so weak.